All comics by cocksucker

Profile

 

by cocksucker
2-15-07
"You've got cancer!", thats what your doctor will say to you if you haven't raped my wife yet.
She's very cheap. Hey this is my wife.
I'm a boy.
he he, she's just joking......Say that again and I'll give you anal....WITH A CHOPSTICK!
.....................................

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
Why did you lock us in?
Watz up nigga!
Oh! Sorry Mr White guy!!! So you fink that coz I'm black you can call me a nigga?
He won't shut up. I better go next door to lock in the Nasi.
It's always about black people! BLACK BLACK BLACK, Yeah you betta run, BITCH!

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
My wife left me...
My son is a emo..
And I'm gay, what more could I ask for?

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
Ih M'i drut.
???
You're that guy from X-men, right?

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
You've parked your car behind mine and haven't moved it for 2 hours, I couldn't get my car out. So I'm arresting you for making me be late for my fat fighters class.
Wanna donu--
--YES!!!

 

Here you go, Rudolf.
Thanks, Jonny... Same time next year?
by cocksucker, 2-16-07

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
11:00 am
...
...
11:01am
Screw this I'm moving into my mother's celler.

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
11:00
.........
........
11:01
I'm going to make a film. I'll call it, "Osama in a cave", I'm going to have a grammy for this.

 
by cocksucker, 2-16-07

 
by cocksucker, 2-16-07

 
by cocksucker, 2-16-07

 

Watch out, she's ready to snap.
GRRRRR!
by cocksucker, 2-16-07

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
That was really good, Marcia.
My name is, Kerry!
GRRRRR!
Ohhh Shit.

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
AGHHHHH!!
Happy Halloween?!?

 

by cocksucker
2-16-07
Ha ha. I've made a fence inside my house. I love to see a zombie get into my house. Ha ha
Boo!!
Umm, I'm over here.
Oh god damn it.

 

by cocksucker
2-19-07
He dude, where are all of the chicks, babes, foxes, girls?
He he he.
Whats so funny?
This is a GAY bar.

 

by cocksucker
2-19-07
Hi baby!!
I hate men who can't handle their drink.
Lol. I'm not a man.

 

by cocksucker
2-19-07
I'm going to kill you.
And how are you going to do that?
Well first I'm going to pull off your afro and shove it up your arse. Then I'm going to tie your beard to a fat mans leg whilst he's eating a chicken flavoured pie.
How the hell is that going to kill me?

 

by cocksucker
2-19-07
Being a non-donor is hard work.
How is it, You don't have to like door NOBS do you?
NO!! It's hard work because no one looks at your comics and when they do they message you saying "Hi nice comics, let's have sex." and " Lololol, your comics are so funny. Can I give you anal?"
Oh. Well it's not easy being a cock either you know.
All you do is cluck and sit on eggs all day.
I'm going. and No, thats chickens.

 

by cocksucker
2-23-07
American President
I want world peace.
British President
I want world peace.
Chinese President
I want to play ping pong.

 

by cocksucker
3-08-07
Hey, what are ya doing?
Sleeping on da job are ya?
Ewwww! You're eating the chewing gum stuck under the table, you pig!
mmm, cherry.

 

by cocksucker
3-10-07
Happy 50th birthday Osama.
Thank you.
So what did you get for your birthday?
Well I got a white pair of pants from George Bush saying "No more war, let there be peace" and a fat b*tch going down a slide.
Right, well I bought you some turbans..OH look what time it is!! I better be going, have fun with your pants and the b*tch going down the slide, bye.
Some turbans? I don't wear turbans.

 

by cocksucker
3-18-07
After 16 and a half beer's
Yo homi', get yo' blak ass over her'
I ain't your homi'. I ain't even black.
Fuck yo'..homi'
I told you, I ain't yo' homi'.... Run, I've got AIDs!!

 

by cocksucker
3-23-07
Ok here's a good one. "What is hairy, scary and weighs 500 pounds?"
Umm, I don't know.
Well it says here that "It's your mother's"
My mother haven't got a dog. Maybe it's talking about my mothers pussy?

 

by cocksucker
4-10-07
Hello?
Do you want something?
Your wife has been killed. I don't know how.
But I'm gay!

 

by cocksucker
4-10-07
Hi...I'm, The Easter Bunny. But you can call me, Bob.
What do you want, Bob?
Some of that coffee.
This ain't coffee.
What is it then?
100% home made CUM!

 

by cocksucker
4-10-07
I'm going to be like you when I'm older, Daddy.
How? You're not Evil at all.
Yes I am.
What have you ever done Evil?
I told bush to bomb Iraq.
That was your mother!

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
Hi, Gary. Remember me?
Jesus? Where am I?
You're in hell.
Noooo!
Just kiddin'. You're in Afghanistan!
Noooooooooooooooooooo!

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
Dad, I'm home.
So, uh the same time next week?
Yes, I'd love to.
Who are you?
Just call me "The Doctor".

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
Had a bad day, Chen?
Yes, I just got fired.
I just got nailed to this wall and people started sticking sticky paper on my back saying "Hug me I'm lonely" and "I use 2B a pig"
Thats aweful.
I know, they can't even spell "To be".

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
What are you doing?
I just got nailed to this wall and people started sticking sticky paper on my back saying "Hug me I'm lonely" and "I use 2B a pig"
No. There are no sticky notes on you and you're not stuck to the wall.
Really? Well If my hand wasn't stuck to the wall how come this happen's?
OH MY GOD!!!
I told you so.

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
Jesus Christ, what are you doing?
Nothing, Judas.
You do know you can breathe without the spacesuit, don't you?
Yeah!
Well why are you wearing it?
The pants are really tight and it makes me feel like a girl, that's why.

 

by cocksucker
4-21-07
Somewhere in Virginia
So you want a job, eh?
Yes, sir.
Well you've got good qualifications and it says here that you work well with people, so that's great.
So have I got the job?
Yes. What's your name, son?
Ummmmm, eh...,Cho Seung-hui.

 

Cool, I can see my house from here.
by cocksucker, 4-21-07

 

by cocksucker
4-22-07
You've got the job, Gary. What was your job before you applied for this?
Uhhhh....
Flash Back
GET ME OUTTA' HERE!
I was a teacher!

 

by cocksucker
5-19-07
STUPID COMPUTER!
What's wrong?
It's this computer, it isn't coming on.
Have you tried switching it on?
Have you tried SHUTTING THE HELL UP?

 

by cocksucker
5-19-07
Hey, boss. How come people always pic on me?
It's easy, ben. It's because you're black.
Well how come no one pics on Chen?
It's easy. It's because the Janises likes ping pong.
I like ping pong.
Yes....But you're black!

 

by cocksucker
5-19-07
Today we've got a special guest, Osama bin laden. He's going to tell us how he became the most successful bomber in the world, and he'll tell us some of his secrets so we'll be as good as him.
Hi I'm Osama, today I'll be telling you how to destroy your enemies.
Osama, we're a loyal company who likes to beat the other companies fair and square, could you help us with that?
No. Look mate I think you've called the wrong person for this, you should've called Mickey Mouse or The little mermaid, not a bomber.
Ok, can you sell us all some of your secrets?
I wash in a lake, I live in a cave, I bomb white people. I have no secrets.

 

by cocksucker
5-19-07
Hi I'm Jesus. You might not remember me but I died for your sins.
What's that? You don't care. Would you like to avenge my death? You would, great.
Go to the Jews cathedral and plant a bomb under seat 2977, then come and see me for more information.

 

by cocksucker
5-21-07
God damn it.
What's wrong?
My computor has got a bug.
Why don't you give it some medicine?
Shut up!!!

 

by cocksucker
5-21-07
Hi little girl, can you please pass the hammer over here?
Why?
So I can pull this nail out of my hand.
lol.
What's so funny?
You're like Jesus but he was nailed to a cross not a wall, and he was white.

 

by cocksucker
5-22-07
So it's a deal then?
Yes it is.
Thank you. Is there anything I can do for you?
Pull my finger

 

by cocksucker
5-22-07
Hi, can I have a job?
Have you got any qualifications?
No.
So what are you good for?
pocking.
Hey you're right. You're hired.

 

by cocksucker
6-02-07
What a lovely day it is today.
Nice and peacefull. I love Earth, I love everything and everyone on it.
Kick me the ball!
GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME, NIGGER!

 

by cocksucker
6-02-07
Hi, Daddy.
Hi, Son.
Where's you pants Daddy?
Have you every heard of a testectomy?

 

by cocksucker
8-10-07
Hey, you're not alloud in the mens toilet. Get out.
You sexist prick!
I'm not being sexist. It says that this is the mens toilet, the womens toilet is next door.
How was I supose to know she was was transsexual?

 

by cocksucker
8-10-07
Why are you always dressed up as a bunny?
To scare people.
Being dressed up as a bunny don't scare people.
Oh. Hold on then.
AGHHHHH!
Scarier?

 

by cocksucker
8-10-07
Went on the internet last night and typed in rehab and you never guess who came up.
John Lennon.
No..wait yes. How did you know?
Just really obvious that's all.
Ok I dear you to type in...No I've got no come back, I'm ashamed.
But black people have got bigger dicks!

 

by cocksucker
8-10-07
God, how come most black people are born in hot and poor places?
Dunno
But you're the almight God, you know everything.
Yeah, well it's hard to remember something when you've got a major hang over. That mary has big hooters.
Mary the mother of Jesus?
No, Mary Osborne, of cource Mary the mother of Jesus!

 

by cocksucker
8-10-07
Hey, why have you got a turkey tied to your stomach?
Well I'm trying to give up herion straight away.
So tieing a turkey around your stomach stop that?
No. I'm a stand up comidian. It's cold turky. tadaa
...

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