All comics by darwin_farkus

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by darwin_farkus
11-05-09
Sal! Just the girl I wanted to see! Say Sal, did you catch the HUEY, JEWIE and LOUIE comedy special on W.E.T. last night?
Ugh... No. And not that I care, but what is W.E.T.?
It's WHITE ENTERTAINMENT TELEVISION! New network! Just launched!
Let me guess... Like B.E.T. it takes the lowest common denominator of our collective social intelligence and multiplies it by our cultural complacency to be a nation of retarded fuck-ups?
Pretty sure you're thinking of E! So anyway...

 

by darwin_farkus
11-05-09
As Performed By Various Klansmen...
Go fuck a TREE!
Fuck off, SHIT DEMON!
As Performed By God And Space Jesus...
Hey, if the SHOE fucks, EAT it!
There IS no gravity on Planet Fuck!
And Finally, As Performed By O.J. Simpson And Nicole-Brown Simpson...
I could shoot the BIRD out of an EYE flying!
Are we going to fuck their MELONS or eat their COCKS?

 

by darwin_farkus
1-08-14
Yee-uh. Yee-uh. Uh-huh. Uh! Nigga! Yee-uh..
Tight! Tight tight! This shit is tight! I'm hardcore. Guys that like this get pussy.
Ugh. This makes my pussy SOOOO wet. I bet it would piss my daddy off if I fucked a black guy.
This is totes fresh. I'm hip because I'm white, nerdy and diverse. Like, I can hang with gangsta rap AND Death Cab.
Hmm... I'd better nod along and be accepting of this or else people will think I'm a racist.
(Sigh)... Sam Cooke... Smokey Robinson... I miss the days when niggers wrote actual songs...

 

by darwin_farkus
1-20-14
Sweetheart, I'm afraid I have some bad news...
Oh Christ, Mom... Is it one of the cats? Did we lose one of the cats?!
I don't really know how to tell you this... Your uncle just called. Your dad passed away unexpectedly this morning.
And... Well, yes, one of the cats IS missing, too...
NOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

 

by darwin_farkus
8-30-15
Gordo touch... devil dookie?
I wouldn't.
I would.
Do it then.
Cunt.

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