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I like meat *clap, clap*. PantzIzGood2Eat.

 

House tickle froth paste. by dikrok 7-05-04
FAT BONERS Yum.	FAT BONERS Tootsie! Just call ME Preggosaurus.	FAT BONERS? FAT BONERS.

 

Spider-Man 2 by dikrok 7-09-04
So I went and saw the Spider-Man 2 today. Oh yeah? I haven't seen that yet.	Lemme just tell you one thing, you know that scene in the commercial where Harry is about to pull of Spider-Man's mask before he kills him? ... Yeah?	See, he switched places with a robot. Because he said to DocOck, "here, you can just give Harry this robot instead". You just ruined it for me, didn't you?

 

Go download Girls On Film by Duran Duran, I command you. by dikrok 8-15-04
Maybe we would have found Sanderson Cussing by now if you weren't too busy picking peoples butts.	I swear to fucking christ that if you talk down to my biological bee-compulsions again I will sting you full of acid. I ain't never heard of a bee making no honey out of ass-lint.	Would it please you if we moved out scenery to the caves of Iraq?! It is probably close to where Sanderson is hiding!

 

Telekenesis is for sissies, bitch. by dikrok 8-15-04
So Chino and Manga have arrived in Viet Nam, have they? Perfect. I will send Tomboy to join them soon enough. And what of me, master, what shall I do?	Are you any good at math, maybe you can wash my car, or play your complimentary copy of Jeapordy for the Nintendo Genesis Entertainment Man. Sanderson will pay for bearing Millie Cussings children!	Menwhile... Maybe I am really a concealed rocket ship. I think there are some of Sandersons eggs hidden in this tree. If I consume them I will enter an atered state of conscience and go on a rampage. I need a fizzix!

 

Tank tank. by dikrok 8-15-04
*SNIFF* OH YEAH THESE INSECT OVUMS SURE CAN MAKE A FAGGOT LIKE ME GET ALL HOPPED UP.	NOW I HAVE TURNED INTO A FUCKING ROBOT. WHERE TO GOD DAMN RAMPAGE FIRST?	What is Csetop Cmaelon doing here! Robot rampages are played out asshole, what the fuck is your problem. YOU WOULD CRY TOO IF IT HAPPENED TO YOU, DOOT DOOT DOO DOOT DOO!

 

LIKE NUFFIN EVAR HAPPINNED by dikrok 6-28-07
MEANWHILE: It is time to put an end to your horrendous subplot right now you fucking shitty subplot of a son of a bitch. Oh my god why are you IN this comic anyway you complete ass-fucktard? OH ARE YOU SURE ABOUT THAT?! ARE YOU SURE THAT THE TIME FOR SUCH THINGS WAS NOT (oh how do you make text more dramatic if you're already typing in all caps again?) THREE YEARS AGO!!!	ARE YOU EVEN A NAMED CHARACTER?! I don't want to remember! You were shitty shitty shitty shitty shitty shitty shitty shitty shitty and you must D I E , N -O- W . LIKE FUCK AM I GONNA DIE. EAT ASS, CRACKER.	LOOK. I DONT EVEN WANT TO THINK UP A CLEVER WAY TO PWN YOU. I WAS GONNA TURN YOU INTO A CLOUD OF SMOKE AS I UNLEASHED THREE YEARS OF PENT UP FARTING ON YOU, BUT IT DIDN'T LOOK COOL. THEN I WAS GOING TO TURN ME INTO FLAMES, BUT THAT HAD BEEN DONE BEFORE. SO WOULD YOU PLEASE JUST GET LOST YOU FUCKING NUISANCE?! Woah. That's some rough stuff. I... I don't know what to say to that...

 

SIBLING RIVALRY by dikrok 3-06-08
LADIIIIIIIIIIES He'll never know what hit him!	Ah fuck! I farted!	Here I come to rape you!

 

Slibbing Raviolli by dikrok 3-08-08
fuckpiss CAN'T A MAN GET HIS RAPE ON IN THIS DAY AND AGE? HAVEN'T YOU HEARD OF AIDS	cumballs IT'LL NEVER HAPPEN TO ME!!! THINK AGAIN, STATISTICS SHOW THAT MOST PEOPLE WHO CONTRACT AIDS DO SO AS A RESULT OF UNPLANNED RAPE	rapetenticle THAT'S JUST AN OLD WIVES TALE. TOLD BY OLD WIVES WHO DON'T WANT ME TO GET MY RAPE ON HOW WELL DOES THIS CAPE HIDE MY HARD~ON?

 

CATCHING UP WITH MA by dikrok 3-08-08
SO ANYWAY I GOT THAT PROMOTION AT WORK TO "SENIOR VICE RAPE ANALYST" I THINK IM REALLY GOING PLACES MA. I'm proud of you Chester. You always had a rapey dick.	IVE GOT A NEW RAPE TECHNIQUE. I GO LIKE THIS. ARE YOU WATCHING? mm-hm	BOY-OY-OY-OY-OYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MERRY CHRISTMAS FROM THE CAST AND CREW OF DIKROK COMICS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

To-gether again!

THE FIGHT OF THE CENTURY SANDERSON CUSSING!!!!! CHESTER THE MOLESTER!!!

by dikrok, 3-08-08

 

In which the topic of rape is discussed. by dikrok 3-09-08
Hey what's up? This is Estephan. And I'm Chester.	We both rape. But I rape harder.	It's important to remember only to rape with a consenting partner who is willing to rape you back. Pussy.

 

In which rape is not discussed. by dikrok 3-09-08
Dad can I borrow five... fifteen dollars? What is it this time Estephan?	Omigod omigod omigod. Can't you hear the music? The taco trucks are on the way!!! You have GOT to kick this damn taco habit of yours.	Fifteen dollars of tacos and I'll be set for the week!!! Here's forty. Pick me up a chihuahua.

 

Sly and the Family Stone by dikrok 3-09-08
Hey, when you're suckin' on them titties, does your mom ever need a fella to reach in there and give 'em a pinch to get the flow started? Or a squeeze? Hm... Nope.	But I'm really good at pinching! Put in a good word for me just in case? Dude, just give it up. You're never gonna cop-a-feel on the bountiful heaven in which I routinely burry my face, okay?	TAKING MATTERS INTO HIS OWN HAND, OUR CRAB HERO CONFRONTS THE OBJECT OF HIS DESIRE. I'd like to help you whip out your gazongas at feeding time, today, Mrs. Wilmington. Sorry Meyers. There's only one kind of crab for me, and I've already got 'em.

 

My hump, my hump, my hump my hump my hump. by dikrok 3-09-08
I was raped by the sweetest vampire today! Oh, I'm sorry I don't know why I'm telling you this, Meyers. I didn't mean to get personal....	No Mrs. Wilmington it's quite alright. You.... can tell me anything... yeah....	YOU FUCKING SON OF A BITCH I'VE BEEN WAITING SO LONG TO TAP THAT AND YOU JUST USE YOUR VAMPIRE HYPNOSIS POWER? YOU FUCKING ASSCLOWN I COULD KILL YOU WHERE YOU STAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! My milf-rape brings all the crabs to the yard!

 

THE OLD BAIT AND SWITCH by dikrok 3-09-08
What Feeding time, Mangabey!	the gay Awright!!!!!	fuck? Hey what the-?

 

This is a UNIX system. No it's not. by dikrok 3-09-08
So Mr Wilmington can you give me any pointers on how I might be able to convince Mrs. Wilmington to grant this little crab his lifelong dream... of pounding my crabmeat relentlessly into her crevasse? Well you could try writing her a poem. Maybe sign her up for a free trial of AOL 3.0 with Netscape.	But Chester the vampire just rapes away at her any time he feels like it! And are you a vampire named Chester?	No, I suppose not. Then I guess life's not fair, and you have to work with what you're given. Hey wait, are we talking about the Mrs. Wilmington that's my wife? Not my mother??? FUCK!!! Ah well, too late to stop it now.

 

It is a joke because in the background of the last panel... by dikrok 3-09-08
Meanwhile... Three rapes in the same day! You sure know how to spoil a girl! Mrs. Wilmington, can I be honest with you about something?	Sure, Chester, what is it? It's actually me, Estephan, Chesters brother. We've been switching off.	This is... I can't believe this... I feel... MILFY TO THE MAX!!! You know what they say, it takes a village!

 

The Ballad of the Salad by dikrok 3-10-08
I wrote a poem for you Mrs. Wilmington, would you like to hear it? Um... alright.	Okay, here goes... Take off your top, your pants: drop. This crab has got to grab. I'd be a buffoon not to squeeze your balloons so let me do that soon. Get back to work Meyers.	somnambulist But that's only the first half!!! Goodbye Meyers. Take care of the baby. I'll see you this afternoon.

 

Dikrok Comics: RETRO flashback!? Pt.1 by dikrok 3-14-08
WHEN we last heard from Sanderson Cussing, there was a crooked Scientologist mafia coming to enact their revenge on the now deceased Millie Cussing on her.... But that was a long time a-go. And now Sanderson Cussing, too, has passed on. But before she went, she left hundreds of fertile eggs of her own spawn behind, to repopulate a now diminished planet. I'll be playing the Scientologist today.	AND now a reenactment of what might have happened in the latest days of that fateful year of 2004... STOP THIS MADNESS SCIENTOLOGISTS I see your point I will go away now and probably burn in a firey death like so many strip creator villains before me.	But who is this! I, Csetop Cmaelon have saved you and now we must run off to do some other sort of world saving activity and then we did that and yadda yadda ya. Hey, 2004's over and this comic has a new ongoing story

 

Californiavacation by dikrok 3-14-08
This is upsetting, just stop. Look at me, I'm what, a couple months old? I shouldn't be hearing this sort of stuff about my mom, okay? But you're my IN, Mangabey, you can turn this AROUND.	Have you considered that I in no way wish to PIMP OUT MY MOM Pimp my ride!	Thanks.

 

This is a comic where Meyers the Crab hits on Mrs Wilmington by dikrok 3-14-08
Welcome back home, Mrs. Wilmington, did you have a nice day? I menstruated, Meyers. I menstruated and made no apology for my actions.	You could go to jail! FUCK jail! I'm a woman and I can do with my body as I please! Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, GOD OR GOVERNMENT can take that away from me!	RIGHT ON, Mrs. Wilmington!!! YOU tell 'em! And if YOU wanna fuck a crab, then BY GOD you're gonna ride that crab like there's no tomorrow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I hear ya! Meyers.... no.

 

It ends with a THANK YOU CHIEF MOOSE joke by dikrok 3-14-08
But Mrs. Wilmington, you could be in serious trouble! If the cops are on their way, wouldn't you like one last act of passion before you get sent to the slammer? It's not that severe of a crime Meyers. Like downloading a song or smoking pot. Some people might be dicks about it, but everybody knows it doesn't matter.	YOU MENSTRUATED!!!! IN A PLACE OF BUSINESS!!! Are we even living on the same PLANET?!?! Aparently not, Meyers.	MEANWHILE All available units, we have a positive ID on our menstruation suspect. Rape with excessive force! THANK YOU CHIEF MOOSE

 

A neigh-bor hood stroll. by dikrok 3-17-08
Hey Jerff, I haven't seen you in a while. How've ya been? Yeah, I haven't left the house much, I just haven't felt up to it lately.	Oh? I'm sorry to hear that. Everything going okay? Anything I can do to help? Oh, it's okay you know, uh...	It just seems like it's all downhill after you've shat on the stillborn body of a baby you've aborted and raped in front of it's parents. Atta boy!

 

A standoff in 3 parts part 1 (of three). by dikrok 3-17-08
Oh god, ugh... I'm kinda embarassed to say this... What is it? What's on your mind.	Uh, I kinda forgot what this standoff was about. It's the darndest thing. Oh thank god! Y'know I wasn't gonna say anything....	You wanna grab lunch or something? Good idea. We should keep our weapons trained on eachother though, in case the overlords swing by.

 

A standoff in three parts part two (of 3) by dikrok 3-17-08
I want to thank you again for suggesting this. I feel so much better with full stomachs. Yeah, I didn't see any reason to not take care of ourselves during this little debacle.	Oh god I just remembered why we were pointing blasters at eachother!!! Really? You did!? What's it all about?!	Do you remember kidnapping my sister, destroying a populated solar system and declaring yourself king of all existence? OOOHHH YEAH!!!! Who could forget a thing like that!!! That's so crazy!

 

A standoff in three parts part 2 (of 3) by dikrok 3-17-08
This is amazing, after you mentioned all that stuff, yeah I remember doing it all, but... y'know, I feel like a different guy from the guy that did all that stuff. I don't even like your sister. Yeah, before I was all like "I must aprehend this target, he's too dangerous" and blah blah blah, but right now I'm like "dude, this guy's my fucking hero!"	Whattaya say we start over with a clean slate, you and me. No hard feelings, I boff your sister a few times for the hell of it, turn her back over to you and we act like nothing ever happened. You DID destroy a solar system with inhabited planets. Oh wait, that was awesome. Yeah, okay. Gimme a ring when you get bored of my sis. My com link is 7dash 30294a.	7 dash 30294a. Gotchya. Hey, you wanna be king of all existence? It sounded cool at the time but right now I'm not very interested in it. Hey, why not? It's just been that sort of day.

 

An epilogue in two panels parts 1 & 2 of two. by dikrok 3-17-08
A betrayal most unexpected! * pyoo!	*the scene below was cut from the original version of the film. It has been included in this DVD so that the viewer might decide which ending they prefer.	But who, dear readers, was who!? The end.

 

Conversations with Henry, Volume I by dikrok 3-24-08
Ah, I love that guy. What guy is that?	Hamtaro But nobody said anything about Hamtaro.	What language are you speaking? Do you think that's English?

 

Ungrape? by dikrok 3-25-08
Yeah, I agree with you. Seven letters and you had 'em all. You got gypped, my good man. How could the Scrabble dictionary not list RAPEGUN as a word? I was gonna have a bingo!	It's not as though RAPEGUNS don't exist. I have my RAPEGUN right here. I use the word and what it describes constantly!!! MM-hmm, you got a license to be carryin' that there RAPEGUN in a public place?	But officer, the Scrabble dictionary says there's no such a thing as a RAPEGUN. MM-hmm, I'm gonna have to ask you to step out of your vehicle.

 

SCRABBLE HUMOR PART 2 by dikrok 3-25-08
I'm only kidding officer. Of course I have a license for my RAPEGUN. But just out of curiousity, which word do you use more often: RAPEGUN or QI? Rapegun obviously, why?	Because bullshit QI can score you 60 points on it's own, if played appropriately in scrabble while a legitimate word like RAPEGUN CAN'T BE PLAYED!!! Nigga! Why them white folks be hatin'?	They tryin to keep brothers like us DOWN, yo! Fo' RIZZLE. I hear they're releasing an ebonic version of Scrabble, it'll have more z's but they'll only be worth 1 point each. Oh and instead of using math, score is kept by smoking pot.

 

White people saying nigger. by dikrok 3-25-08
bean Well, everything checks out, you're free to go, and enjoy your raping.	bean Oh I intend to officer. I'm actually on my way to a rape right now. I hate to be so forward, but I'm off duty fairly soon.. would you mind if I watched?	bean GIRLFRIEND, you can PARTICIPATE! FUCK YEAH NIGGA

 

Hollah if you love Allah! by dikrok 3-25-08
MANWHALE Father forgive me for I have sinned. It has been two minutes since my last confession. Go on. You-fucking-cunt.	In that time I had vaginal intercourse with six different men, and did anal through a glory hole with at least two separate people, that and I sucked off a mule while my husband pissed on me. Was all of this consentual? Including the donkey?	Well it wasn't consentual on my part. Nor was protection used at any point. What a saint you truly are! You are free to go and Jesus will be saying about 90 Hail Mary's to YOU

 

Part 1 of a six panel comic! by dikrok 3-25-08
Hey Mr. Wilmington, I was wondering if you could give me any hints as to how I can bag your wife in the immediate future. Any tips? Hold on, let me ask an expert.	Hey Chester, this question's a bit out there, but it's for a friend, bear with me. Here's the qustion: what would you say the best way is to get my wife to put out? Lemme get back to you on that.	Hey bitch, if I was to wanna stick my dick in you, how might we arrange such a thing? Um, Chester, you know you never have to ask permission. Just rape away.

 

Part two of a 6 panel comic! by dikrok 3-25-08
She said just to rape her.	Just go ahead and rape her.	And so... So Mrs. Wilmington, seems like you're finally ready for some crustacean molestation. Oh Jesus, Meyers, I'm not going to have sex with you.

 

Flattery by dikrok 3-25-08
Your beauty is comparable to no other woman, but to the grandest wonders nature has ever brought forth. You're as radiant as the sun.	Your body calls out to be ravaged like a still standing World Trade Center tower... hey, don't walk away, I'm pouring my heart out!!!	What is this??? Hey stranger, it's your lucky day.

 

The inner struggle of a horny crab by dikrok 3-25-08
Mrs. Wilmington got me a hooker? Then this must mean she cares after all... either that or maybe I've just pestered her enough... Hooker? No, big boy. Try love slave. Now quit talking and undress me.	I don't know if I can accept this, I... lately I've been so horny for human women I haven't given a thought to other crabs... Did you hear me big boy? I'm still wearing my shell...	...but on the other hand, Mrs. Wilmington was being a prude and this babe's ready to put out! Guess it's time to knock shells!!! That's more like it sweetheart, don't be afraid.

 

Striving for Decency by dikrok 3-25-08
Woo... ha... mmm... before we get carried away, I've got a room here. I wouldn't want the baby to see what I'm about do do with you. Whatever you're most comfortable with, sweetheart.	Let's smother eachother in Old Bay and lick it off! You're wilder than I thought! Now we're talkin'!	(they are inside the cabinet) Why couldn't they have just stayed in the kitchen??! YEAH YEAH YEAH! MORE! OH, liKE THAT, THAT'S RIGHT. THAT IS FUCKIN' RIIIIIIGHT!!!

 

"Emo" through the ages. by dikrok 3-25-08
2002 Hey you with the Sweater and glasses, U R EMO! I TOTALLY PWNT YOU! Heathen!	2007 As a self appointed expert on the subject despite only being twelve and inexperienced at all things life, I annoint you EMOOOOOOOO, loser, go cut yourself L0L PWNT I just can't counter the remarks of this unknowledgeable nobody!	2012 Hey Quetzalcoatl! Real cool eye lazers, NOT, UR SO EMO oooooooohhh! Perish pesky mortal, by my bloody hand of doom.

 

The Plight of Pleather-Man by dikrok 3-25-08
2002 Hey you there! U R SO GOTH! HA HA HA HA HA HA. GO CUT YOURSELF. What a silly, silly little boy.	2007 HEY YOU! Quit bein' so EMO! OMFG IRL I LOL'ed Ah, YouTube, you have taught our children well.	2012 HEY YOU OVER THERE... Fucking drop it, kid, all I've ever been is gay. You know it, your ass know it, the only things here not registering this fact are your repressed traumatized memories.

 

WHAT GIRLS TALK ABOUT AT THE OFFICE by dikrok 3-25-08
So how are things going at home, with that... crab? Is he still hounding you for a pounding? Actually I think I might have sidestepped that problem by getting him a love slave.	Well that's men for ya. One minute you're the only one they want to rape, then some floozy comes along and they forget all about you. How 'bout you? Are you getting any action these days?	Do you see my knockers? I can't stop looking, honestly.

 

Omigod are the Wilmington's actually talking to eachother??? by dikrok 3-25-08
Hey sweetie, welcome home. How are the mammary glans? Full and succulent. How's the baby?	Oh he slept like a right bastard after I flogged him against a rock. He's just waking up. And dinner? Has Meyers got dinner ready?	I haven't seen Meyers since this morning. I thought you'd given him the day off... You know what it is? He's getting his jollies out with that love slave I got him! Well today I'll excuse it, but he'd better not make a habit of cutting work over this!!!

 

RUOK by dikrok 3-25-08
(Meyers and his love slave are inside the night stand) Meyers? Is everything going alright in there? Oh, hi Mrs. Wilmington. It's good to hear your voice, that'll help me cum quicker.	Well I just wanted to check on you because Morton said he hadn't seen you all day. Everything's fine, thanks for you concern! I think my dick just got harder from the though that you cared enough to see if I was still alive!	Well I do care Meyers, I just don't ever want to sleep with you, but... I do consider us to be friends. You... do? OOOOOOOHBOY! JESUS GOD LOOK AT ALL THE CUM!!! We're gonna need to hose this down!!!

 

Mrs.Wilmington's inner dialogue monologue! by dikrok 3-25-08
Gosh, Meyers seems to be enjoying his new love slave. I wonder if he'll still beg to grab my milkers. . .	I'm not feeling nostalgic for the ol' horny bastard lusting after me, am I?	??? Naaaaah.

 

Paco Ordóñez by dikrok 3-25-08
That's wonderful news to hear that Meyers has somebody else to rape now. Seems like now I can finally get another turn with you! Honey, Meyers never raped me, that was Estephan and Chester, the two vampire brothers. . . Honey?	Ahem, Mr. Wilmington, Mrs. Wilmington, I have an announcement.	Omigosh, they're getting married already! I farted!

 

Conversations with Henry, Volume II by dikrok 3-25-08
You know what I haven't heard for a while? Dancing with the Chuckster. Oh you're just not listening, they still play it.	You'll have to call me up at home next time they play it. Somehow I have the feeling it's not important enough to warrant that...	Hey where IS Chuckster? I don't think he's on the schedule today, Henry.

 

Good night. by dikrok 3-25-08
Hey Mangabey. Sorry I wasn't around much today, have you seen your folks? Yeah, they're in their room rediscovering eachothers genitals.	Oh, well if you see 'em, could you tell 'em I'm going to turn in for the night, and I'll be back to work as usual tomorrow? Sure lemme just write a note down like I'm their fucking secretary. Would you like me to get you a cup of coffee you son of a bitch?	God christ, what crawled up your ass, you brat? I live in a house with sex crazed perverts. You get to go to bed. I have to have someone carry me there. Thanks for offering to keep me company. Oh that's right, you didnt. You're going to bail on me.

 

Re-onion by dikrok 3-25-08
Morton, I honestly forgot how big your cock could get inside of me. What happened to us? Somebody please just PUT me in my CRIB.	You wanna know the gods honest truth? It's our fucking kid. When have you ever seen me without him? Thank god he's sleeping. I've missed ejaculating all over your chest. I'M NOT SLEEPING YOU TERRIBLE, TERRIBLE FUCK-UP OF A FATHER!!!!!!!	Did you just hear the baby? .......Never mind that, Meyers will get him. They're just gonna leave me out hear. Great, fucking great. HEY THANKS FOR STICKING ME IN A HOUSE WITH A BUNCH OF HORNY MORONS, GOD.

 

I Dream of Ian Malcolm by dikrok 3-25-08
I can't believe I'm sleeping in the hallway.	I hate these people.	So I'm here, uh, my myself ah, talking to myself. That, that's chaos.

 

Assigning blame. by dikrok 3-27-08
Oh honey we left the baby out in the hallway all night. See, I told you I thought something was wrong.	Don't go making this my fault! You were on top!	I'm just saying we've gotta be more careful. WE have got to be more careful. So in other words, PWNT.

 

The Ultimate Nullifier by dikrok 3-27-08
Hot damn! I came here to pick up Mrs. Wilkinson, but her assiociate's quite a piece of ass, too!!!	Excuse me. You're getting horny, very very horny. I want to rape your bod... Not gonna work, pal.	What, why not? Your Vampire hypnosis power is nullified by the hypnotic power of my amazing gazongas. You're going to have to try a little more earnestly.

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