All comics by Chuckaduck

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by Chuckaduck
3-10-05
Married Autobot Chuck: W...whu....what the fuck are you? Where am I!?
THE FRO: How quickly one forgets. I am the center of the FroBeast. The part that has bonded with the fro you left behind.
Married Autobot Chuck: Frightening.
THE FRO: You must be assimilated before you tell others.
Married Autobot Chuck: Yeah, NO! MATRIXGETTHEFUCKOUT!!!
THE FRO: Yousa not allowed in heya!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-10-05
I'm a moron.
Married Autobot Chuck: W...whu....what the fuck are you? Where am I!?
THE FRO: How quickly one forgets. I am the center of the FroBeast. The part that has bonded with the fro you left behind.
Married Autobot Chuck: Frightening.
THE FRO: You must be assimilated before you tell others.
Married Autobot Chuck: Yeah, NO! MATRIXGETTHEFUCKOUT!!!
THE FRO: Yousa not allowed in heya!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-11-05
Nathen "That smell? It's my thumb." King encounters a fairy.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,um, cool. You're like a fairy from my new Xbox game. Hehe.
The Friggin' Fairy: Yes, I suppose that I am feathered one.
You may be wondering what's with the 'hehe's at the end of his statements.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, can you do magic and stuff? Hehe.
The Friggin' Fairy: Yes chickenesque creature, I can.
It's called a 'Nate period'.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, thats cool. Hehe.
The Friggin' Fairy: Your pathetic, in a cute way... ...to a person prone to pitying others.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-11-05
In real life, honest, after every single thing he says, Nate will say, "hehe". It's not a Beavis & Butthead laugh sort of thing mind you...
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,um, in this game for the XBox, I'm a wizard with a sword.
Wizard with a sword?!?!
...it's more a sound of a goose honking, were said goose trying its damn hardest to make it sound like a human laughing.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, huh? Hehe.
The Friggin' Fairy: ZAP!
That, or picture a living bicycle horn getting getting it's nuts stepped on twice in rapid succession. Maybe I cannot explain it. It's still funny.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,um, num, hehe, hum,num, hehe, umnum, hehe, hehe, *splooge*.
The Friggin' Fairy: Oh my, you've secreted some substance all over your nerdy feathers.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
You ever get a late night phone call from an unidentified woman claiming she wants your man-meat in the worst way in a very sexy voice?
?
And then she goes into details of what she's going to do with her tongue and whatnot the moment she's got you in the same room?
Married Autobot Chuck: Chuck!
The Chuck of Days Past: Hey Chuck. Glad to see you. Surprised but glad.
Yeah, me neither.
Married Autobot Chuck: Have you seen...?
The Chuck of Days Past: ...The coolest little kid in the world pass by recently? Sure! He went into the city looking for Farmer Chuck.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
Y'know, I wish I had a dollar for every time a supermodel gave me head.
Married Autobot Chuck: Why does he want to see Farmer Chuck I wonder?
The Chuck of Days Past: Kid's just trying to help out his dad. *snicker*
I wouldn't have any money or anything, but the prospect of a first class bj from a kick ass model followed up by a dollar rocks.
Married Autobot Chuck: What?
The Chuck of Days Past: No, nothing. Just tickles me that once you took over you got all cleaned up, married, started working, had a kid, y'know... ...grown up shit.
I could go buy a soda or something.
Married Autobot Chuck: You're not going to want a hug or something are you? You're kind of funked out right now.
The Chuck of Days Past: Hey, do YOU see a fucking shower around here?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
Say, just out of curiosity; Have you ever gone on a camping trip with your loser friend 'Fuller', gotten real drunk and passed out at some point?
Married Autobot Chuck: So, before I go, let me ask; What you been doing lately?
The Chuck of Days Past: Getting eaten by worms.
And the next day you woke up with a headache and a sore asshole?
Married Autobot Chuck: Oh, hey that's great. Um, what's with the dude with the squid on his face?
The Chuck of Days Past: *Sigh* Don't ask. Just ignore him.
*Giggle* Hi Nate. HA!
The Chuck of Days Past: I'm thinking of naming him Squidward just to amuse myself.
Dark Chuck: IT IS NOT A SQUID!! IT'S A BEARD!! AND I'VE GOT NO PLACE ELSE TO GO!!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
I wanted to take just one panel and introduce you to Richdawg. I've used the character below for two reasons. 1-He's named Splooge, 2-I have a photo of him making that exact face.
Chester: You know, I owe the hateful name/phrase 'Chester, Chester, the Child Molester' to you, ya bitch.
Richdawg: I got nuts bigger than Maddox. Y'like that shit?!
He's currently slaving away at war for Sat, er, Bush and I haven't seen him in years.
Chester: Are you even paying attention?
Richdawg: Cordless phone! Cordless phone!
I miss him. Namely because he's awesome, sexy, and gave great head. Hey Rich, if you and "HER" don't eVER work out, I want to have your next baby.
Chester: Okay, what's up with the narrator?
Richdawg: Godamnit Chuck, quite being gay!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
I just read an article on Mariah Carrey because she's ample with the cleavage (the whore). She had her limo circle a hotel she'd purchased numerous rooms at for about...
Mateo the Great: Excuse me creature, are you capable of helping me with directions by chace?
John Dillard: ...
..4 grand a pop until they had a red carpet rolled out for her at the entrance. The carpet HAD to be lined with white candles. I buy toilet paper in bulk to save change...
..and this bitch pulls this shit. I propose acts like this be instantly punished by a public beating followed by emptying a bank account to said public.
Mateo the Great: And the purpose of this was.... ... . ..?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
I was going to write something I considered amusing or funny here, because well, my opinion is pretty much the most important one out there as far as I'm concerned.
Ultra Smooth Chuck: B....zrr.... .. ...uuuuh.... ..
Why would I try to make you laugh? I'm what's important here.
Married Autobot Chuck: YOUR ass again. Hey you lying sack of sh...
Ultra Smooth Chuck: .. .... .. ...m...mu.... ....ksss..
It's sooooo not my job to... ...what was I going to say? Oh yeah, I love thongs. A thong on a fine ass woman rocks.
Married Autobot Chuck: ...um, are you okay?
Ultra Smooth Chuck: .....flibjib on the bizmop...... ... ... . .... ..wa.. ...cooo.... ... ..

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
There is something that we always got a kick out of with Nate.
MattMan: Nate! What the fuck are you doing here again?! Get out!
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, I just saw a fairy. Hehe.
Every time you would call in he'd ask...
MattMan: Doesn't surprise me you lanky freak. I'm sure you see them all the time y'fag.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,um, that's cool. Hehe.
...well, hold up, let's do this right...
MattMan: Godamn I hate you Nate.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, hehe.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
Hey Matt.
MattMan: Yo.
?
Step aside if'in y'could. I want to show them how Nate answers the phone.
MattMan: Ha! Pissant.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, huh? Hehe.
Ready Chuck?
?
Married Autobot Chuck: Dude, soooo ready.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
Okay, so everytime we'd call Matt and Nate would answer he'd do the same thing. You'd call and would have to ask to speak with Matt or Nate might sit there with his thumb up his ass & you on the phone
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, hello? Hehe.
Married Autobot Chuck: Is Matt there?
He'd ask, en route to taking the phone to Matt, "Num,um, sup? Hehe." or "Um,num, whatcha been up to? Hehe." You'd reply and no matter what it was he'd say, "Hehe. That's cool. Hehe."
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,um, yeah just a second. Hehe. Um,num, so whatcha been up to? Hehe.
*Dead air*
Finally, as seen below, we stopped replying in that part of the 'conversation'. The result, to our stoned amusement everytime, the result was still the same like seen in this strip.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Hehe. That's cool. Hehe.
*Hateful laughter*

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
I can recall the time Kung-Fu Seth (unused character) had to run back into Matt's house for something while we all (except Nate) were heading out.
MattMan: Nate! Why are you still here?!
?
Nate thought we were gone and had already began to "physically abuse" himself in that oh-so yuck way.
MattMan: Get out.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, I saw this fairy, and she changed, and she had huge tits. Hehe.
Quickly covering himself with someone to hide his shame (and I'd imagine it's something to be highly shameful of, HA!) Seth quickly brought news so we could all laugh at Nate. And we did.
MattMan: Shut up, and get out before I beat you with my oar.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Num,num, she had ears like a cat. Hehe. Like a pussy. Hehe. Hehe. Hehe.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-23-05
MattMan: Nate I don't want to hear about your stupid fairy friend. Get the fuck out and go tell him he's 'dating' a worthless fuck.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, she thought I said I was a wizard with a sword. She wanted me. Hehe.
MattMan: Whoa. Holdup a sec.
The Pubotic Nesticle: Um,num, huh? Hehe.
MattMan: 'Kay. Get out you filthy sex-deprived thing. And I'm soooo gunna seek you out and make your life hell in World of Warcraft. Y'bastard.
?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
Hello. In a recent strip I used the phrase, "covering himself with someone" in regards to Nate "My feet smell like rotten cheesecurd" King's naughty time with himself when an associate walked in on it
Married Autobot Chuck: I'd like to take a moment from my seeking of my offspring to apologize for 'Inner Struggle's recent lack of quality.
I meant to type "covering himself with something" not "someone". Though the idea would be funnier it would not be the truth. And this strip always strives to present only the truth.
Married Autobot Chuck: In the real life of Chuck, a great deal of things... ...have...
I recently had a threesome with Adrianne Lima & Jessica Alba. I rock. Yeah bitch. I rock.
Slightly Drunken Chucky: You sure apologize a lot. Pansy.
Married Autobot Chuck: I'm seriously considering shoving that beer strait up your ass the wide end first.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
What's with everyone pissing off the robot?
Slightly Drunken Chucky: It's funny.
Married Autobot Chuck: It is most certainly not.
Could this be the best possible thing to amuse myself with?
Slightly Drunken Chucky: You see? Right there. You could have just said 'Is not' or 'No it isn't', but you had to get all uppity with your words.
Married Autobot Chuck: Excuse me for speaking like an educated human being, or at least attempting to.
For fucks sake! Quit bitching at each other! YOU, go get drunk and leave Chuck alone. YOU, go find your son you procrastinating fuck!
Slightly Drunken Chucky: Damn, everyone's a bitch now.
Married Autobot Chuck: How the hell am I the one PROCRASTINATING?! You're the making toon strips at work you judgmental shite!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
I remember the beginning to my favorite nursery rhyme; There once was a man named Fogg.
?
*Knock, knock.*
He had a sweet little dog.
Farmer Chuck: Whoa. Are you selling cookies? Man, I could totally go for some cookies... ...or Funions... ...man, I don't know what's goin' on.
Mateo the Great: ....
And would beat him repeatedly with a log... ...wait, I was never told that as a child. What the hell?
Farmer Chuck: AAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!
Mateo the Great: Kaigus fukiot zimroth!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Son! There you are.... ...uh.... ... ......!!!
Married Autobot Chuck: HOLY SHIT!! SON! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU.. ....er... .. .....wait a sec.
?
Married Autobot Chuck: Something just occured to me!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
Why is he flailing his arms like that when he runs?
Married Autobot Chuck: Excuse me!
What the hell? He didn't pass by me before? Where's that shithead off to?
Married Autobot Chuck: Coming through!
Numnumnumnumnumnumnum?
Married Autobot Chuck: Make way!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-24-05
Ultra Smooth Chuck: ...uuuuuh... ...pl.... ...plplpl.... ..brr..
Ultra Smooth Chuck: ..... ... ........ ..drf... ..Freaklinks was a great show.... ..zig.. ....
Married Autobot Chuck: Ugh... *wheeze* ..whoa.... *puff, puff* ...I think I may vomit. And I've got a cramp.
Ultra Smooth Chuck: ...nu... .....cos...... .....rrrr..
Married Autobot Chuck: *Whew* Okay, just something that hit me. Weren't you vaporized like a million strips ago? What the fuck man.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Mateo the Great: Father!
Married Autobot Chuck: Oh man. I'm afraid to look.
Mateo the Great: Fear not parental one. A large red lizard that smelled of feces has come and gone in your absence. With him, the remains of Farmer Chuck were taken.
Married Autobot Chuck: Son, WHY did you kill him? And why did you wander off like that? You scared me.
Mateo the Great: I do apologize father. The scumbag did not appear capable of conversating. It angered me. I obliterated him.
Married Autobot Chuck: Wait a sec. Big red lizard? Shit, I know who you're talking about.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
I hate me for the fuckups I make. Really I do.
Mateo the Great: Father!
Married Autobot Chuck: Oh man. I'm afraid to look.
Really, I'm scum.
Mateo the Great: Fear not parental one. A large red lizard that smelled of feces has come and gone in your absence. With him, the remains of Farmer Chuck were taken.
Married Autobot Chuck: Son, WHY did you kill him? And why did you wander off like that? You scared me.
And yet I'm still better than most people you know. HA!
Mateo the Great: I do apologize father. The scumbag did not appear capable of conversating. It angered me. I obliterated him.
Married Autobot Chuck: Wait a sec. Big red lizard? Shit, I know who you're talking about.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
You know, a lot of people look down on the 80's. Understandably so too.
But what do you expect from the generation after that of the 60's & 70's for fuck'sake.
Married Autobot Chuck: Excuse me sir. I was wishing to inquire about...
I'm just happy we made it to the 90's. The oughts are kind of 'eh', other than the cool shit happening to me personally, of course.
Married Autobot Chuck: STOP PISSING YOURSELF!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Married Autobot Chuck: What could possibly possess a person that shits and pisses themself to reanimate dead personalities around Chuckdom? What the hell are you anyway? What are you doing here?
Nancy: The Narrator promised to give me a lifetime supply of depends adult diapers if I made appearances and reanimated the dead or deadesque.
?!?!?!
Damnit! Why did you talk?!
Nancy: Forgive me, I was passing gas at the moment and didn't think. Is there a breeze in here? My urine soaked pants are getting chilly.
Un-fucking-believable.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Married Autobot Chuck: What's this crap about you employing this disgusting creature to do your underhanded bidding?! AND WHERE THE FUCK ARE THE BACKGROUDS?!?!
First? My own amusement. Second? Loss of funding from partners. The CEO, Something Lee I think, said we just don't have the cash for backgrounds anymore.
Married Autobot Chuck: Awuh?
Just kidding. Here y'go.
Nancy: All mighty isn't he?
Married Autobot Chuck: Oh shut it up and go shit yourself.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Is it really such a shock to find out something like this?
Married Autobot Chuck: Well, YEAH!
Man, you're not going to handle it well at all when I reveal there is no married man Chuck, and that really I'm a thirty-seven year old interior designer, an aetheist, and a lesbian with one leg.
Married Autobot Chuck: WHAT!?!?!
My real name is also Nancy. I've been sucking cunts for about twenty years now.
Nancy: You don't look like a lesbian.
Married Autobot Chuck: Shut it!! This is bullshit! Bullshit!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Nancy: I don't understand. You have two legs.
Married Autobot Chuck: Tell them the truth!
Why? Is it that important? Really?
Nancy: Oh god. *Grunt* I've got the squirts. Oh god.
Married Autobot Chuck: Fuck yes it's important. It's important to ME!
Why?
Married Autobot Chuck: It just IS.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Does it bug you that much?
Married Autobot Chuck: YES!
Fine. I'm not a 37 year old lesbian aetheist.
Married Autobot Chuck: Thank you!
I'm really a twelve year old boy named Billy that enjoys peeing in public places and gay porn.
Nancy: Fancy that.
Married Autobot Chuck: Fuck you!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Other hobbies of mine include fly-fishing, being a whiney brat, and leaving my load in your mac and cheese.
Hold it. That's not the Narrator's regular voice. Something's fucked up here.
I've never had sex and find Nate very...
Farmer Chuck: Shit!
Married Autobot Chuck: AHA!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Farmer Chuck: Crap. Heh. At least I got my licks in before you showed up to spoil the party.
Married Autobot Chuck: How did you even get IN here?
Farmer Chuck: I slipped the Narrator a number. He let me have a go.
Married Autobot Chuck: What?
Married Autobot Chuck: He's bullshittin' right?
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: *Cough* Of course man.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
I can't believe I just happened to find a box of Latina Porn Digest issues.
I've got to get home and get at it.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Old Woman: What's in the box sonny?
Chester: I could tell you something that wasn't the truth. You'd be interested in my lie and wish to see what was in the box. A great deal of humor and embarressment could be had at my expense.
Old Woman: So...
Chester: So I just want to tell you this is a box full of porn that I'm taking back to my residence to whack away with.
Old Woman: Such a nice and honest young gentleman. Now excuse me while I go blow my brains out for the crap that people are sincere and open for in this day & age.
What is it with thongs around here!?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Mmm, *slurp* augl, lglgl, *gobble*, ohmmm...
Farmer Chuck: Say, are you going to let me back into my house or what?
Mateo the Great: You owe my father an apology.
...*slob, slob, slob* hogl...
Farmer Chuck: Technically you're my son too seeing as I'm Chuck so...
Mateo the Great: Silence or be destroyed once more.
.....*slurp* mmmm *gobble, gobble*.... ..
Farmer Chuck: Okay, WHAT the fuck is up with the narration?
Mateo the Great: Haven't a clue swine. And your not clever using that line to get into the front door either.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Yeah homunch. You've got it. Been practicing huh. Nice. Keep going, your dollar is waiting I promise.
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Oh shite! I think the mike is still on! Hnn...
*slurp* *munch* *slob, slob* *splooge!*
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Fuck. Not good. This will be bad for my image.
Aiesha Danawala: Where's my dollar? I've got to go get gang-banged to make bus fare home.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Yeah, about that dollar, all I've got is a five right now.
Aiesha Danawala: Then give me the five.
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Um, no.
Aiesha Danawala: I NEED that money....
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: That's it, aaaallll the way down.
Aiesha Danawala: Hgk *slob, slob, slob*

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Chester: *Pant, pant*
Chester: *Pant, pant*
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Dude, quit looking.
Chester: She's good at that.
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: I know. But she's had about eight years to practice. Now quit looking.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Is that who I think it is?
Chester: Yup.
Married Autobot Chuck: I thought she got incredibly fat.
Chester: She's sucking dick for pocket-change. I think gorging oneself at buffets is out.
Married Autobot Chuck: Gorging. Heh.
Chester: Heh. Man, look at her go.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Sucking cock for a living. I bet her father is just sooo proud of her.
Chester: Man, I forgot all about that asshole. Acting like she was forced into it or something. Wow, she's just taking it ALL!
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Damnit! Does EVERYONE have to fucking see this?
*gobble, gobble* *slob, slob, slob* *spunk* *glob, glob*
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Damn yall. Get out. New rule, no other Chuck's in the Narration Area. Just me.
Aiesha Danawala: Please give me some money. I'm all whored out and I don't want to miss my bus or I'll need to lick that taxi driver's ass again just to get home to my shed.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Oh, yeah. About that five. I really don't have any money right now and I don't get my next check until Monday.
Aiesha Danawala: ...
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: But hey, look at the bright side. You're not going home on an empty stomach.
Aiesha Danawala: That is true.
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Heh. You're such a whore.
Aiesha Danawala: But not a hungry one!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Aren't you leaving?
Aiesha Danawala: I don't really want to rush off and have to tongue that taxi driver's asshole just to get a lift. Do you have a car?
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Yes.
Aiesha Danawala: Can I have a ride home?
Aiesha Danawala: *Gobble, gobble* *sluuuurp* *slob, slob, slob*

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Thanks.
Aiesha Danawala: No prob! Can we go now?
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: I never agreed to anything.
Aiesha Danawala: Please take me home.
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Thanks but I'm not looking to get serious right now. Stop back by on Monday and I'll give you that dollar.
Aiesha Danawala: Five dollars! It was five dollars!

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
Untainted Hooker: Short Bitch cutting in on me action!
Aiesha Danawala: Who the hell you callin' a bitch?!
Untainted Hooker: Me show you good!
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Today just kicks ass.
*Sounds of cats yelling, clothes ripping, and titties a'floppin'*

 

by Chuckaduck
3-25-05
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: That's it, keep it going. Nice. Whoa, not too fast now. Yeah, that's it.
Untainted Hooker: Who he talking to? Aiesha Danawala: I don't know but bitch, YOU GOIN' DOWN!
*Munch, munch, munch* *Glop!*
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: *Whew* What a day.
The Friggin' Fairy: My, how unique. I've never encountered such a strange way to introduce oneself. Are you sure I did it correct?
The Real Chuck or an Unreasonable Facsimile: Absolutely! And it's nice to meet you too... ...now get out.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Howdy folks. I just wanted to FINALLY take a moment to speak to you. First, I wish to apologize for this toonstrip for two reasons.
Married Autobot Chuck: One, for the rushed work done on it sometimes. Two, for it not following its intention of being about me exploring my past to see just how far I've come in life...
Married Autobot Chuck: ...and turning into a slew of both lewd and crude behavior.
Chester: Incredible. Not only is it amazing you made it ALMOST one strip without getting insulted, y'fag, you're actually blubbering like a wet vagina to these people with a strait face... ...y'fag.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: Why can't you assholes leave me be?!?
Chester: Because, again, this isn't just about you. Chuckdom isn't you, it's us and the mindscape of Chuck. You're the one screwing with everyone.
Married Autobot Chuck: Why not just jump on the bandwagon with me in this venture and bring all of this to an end.
Chester: Would that involve a mass tag-team of your wife?
Married Autobot Chuck: .........
Chester: Thought so y'selfish hack.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: You know, for a giant and grotesque pervert such as yourself you sure do tend to speak down to me.
Chester: And?
Married Autobot Chuck: AND I just want to know what you believe gives you the right.
Chester: The huge wang and accompanying testicles.
Married Autobot Chuck: ...your implying I don't have male genitalia again, aren't you.
Chester: Wow, did you pull that revelation out of your tampon or something?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: What's so wrong with the lifestyle I lead?
Chester: It sucks... ...and not in a good or fun way.
Married Autobot Chuck: Making a living, being married to an incredible woman, and raising the coolest little munchkin on the planet sucks?
Chester: Yes. And did you just actually say 'munchkin'.
Married Autobot Chuck: Technically it was typed and nothing was actually said.
Chester: Touché.

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: How, once and for all time, can I get you and the other jackasses to leave me alone?
Chester: Full control of Chuckdom.
Married Autobot Chuck: Not happening.
Chester: A night with the Mrs? Maybe one of her sisters? OH if one of them how about the young...
Married Autobot Chuck: Don't make me Matrix Boom you.
Chester: Well, with the shitting lizard around to revive everyone that's not much of a threat is it 'Dances with Pink Tacos'?

 

by Chuckaduck
3-28-05
Married Autobot Chuck: I'm just trying to solve this.
Chester: No you're not. You're trying to get the rest of us to shut up and sit quietly in the corner while you live a mundane married existance.
Married Autobot Chuck: This continued arguing isn't good for the well being of this toonstrip.
Chester: Huh? What the hell are you talking about? You want to start a Unicorn Masturbation hour? Or maybe sharetime where everyone sits around and licks each other's asses while watching Teletubbies?
What about more fart jokes?
Married Autobot Chuck: You stay out of this!
Chester: We do fart jokes?

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