All comics by Devin

Profile

 

by Devin
1-21-03
Welcome to Danglong Auto Repair!
Um, sir?

 

by Devin
1-21-03
That's not fair! I speak English just fine! Why did they put me in an ESL class?
They tried to put me in an ESL class once. It was ridiculous! The teacher was like, "Does everyone know what a windowsill is?"
...What's a windowsill?

 

by Devin
1-21-03
Tales of Destiny is a bad game. It's ridiculously short, and the ending's bad to boot!
The last boss, Leon, wasn't even a challenge!
...Why are you looking at me like that?

 

by Devin
1-21-03
Oh, wait a minute.
The most recent walkthrough says that you won't betray me if I'm level 40 or above.
Heh heh, sorry about that.

 

by Devin
1-21-03
You know, birds are a superior species.
They can walk, they can swim, AND they can fly.
Oh yeah? Let's see how superior that bird is when I run it over with my car! YEAH!!!

 

by Devin
1-21-03
Namco's American headquarters
Hi, may I help you?
Yeah, I want half my money back for this Tales of Destiny 2 game!
Um, sorry, maybe you should take it up with the store where you bought it--
You guys are cheating me out of all the camping dialogues that were in the Japanese version! What are you gonna do about it?!
Alright, buddy, move along before I haul your ass back to the station.
YOU'LL NEVER SILENCE ME! THE TRUTH WILL BE HEARD!!!

 

by Devin
1-21-03
Hello, WBS 911? I'm calling from Roleplaying Chat; someone's seriously injured here!
Thank you for your call. We will investigate this matter and ban the person in question, if necessary. In the meantime, please use the Ignore feature against the person harrassing you.
Um... thanks, I think.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Good morning, ma'am. I'm here on behalf of Gerber to introduce our baby life insurance plan.
Babies are such fragile beings, and with today's world so dangerous, there's no telling what could happen to your child.
But why does this have to be a bad thing? You can cash in on the death of your child...
*SLAM*

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Look, an adult bookstore!
Is that where grown-ups buy THEIR books?

 

by Devin
1-22-03
I just wanted to be loved!
T-that's how I meant it!
Suuure...

 

by Devin
1-22-03
What if the student was using an erasable pen? What if he was using a pen eraser? What if he made no mistakes?
Grr... what if a frog had wings? It wouldn't bruise its ass jumping up and down!
Oh yeah? What if Pac-man had wings? It wouldn't bruise its ass using the butt-bounce!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Okay, please remove your blouse so I can feel your breasts for lumps.
What happened to the X-ray machine?
Um, it's... broken! Um, yeah, that's it...

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Good morning, dear!
Ssh, David, not so loud! My wife will hear you!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
So my legs gave out and I just fell straight to the floor.
I think I sprained my ankle, broke my arm, and dislocated my hip and my shoulder, because they hurt so bad that I passed out.
But luckily, I woke up before anyone could call the ambulance.
You're fortunate. I'm still trying to pay off the bills from that time when I had the flu.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
I'M NOT GONNA HOLD BACK, BITCHES! I'M GONNA LET LOOSE!
No, Disco, don't do it!
*BRAAAAAP*
Argh!
Peeeee-U!
My god, Disco, you smell!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Oh, oh my god!
Argh...
Oh my god oh my god oh my god!
Help... me...
My rare special-edition "Disco sucks" commemorative mannequin!
Urgh... worry less... about... the mannequin... and more... about... the guy... under it... please...

 

by Devin
1-22-03
The tallest building in New York... *hic* is the Empire State building!
*hic* Wrong! The tallest building in New York is the World Trade--
Shit, you're right. *hic*

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Yeah, I know I did really bad on this test... I only got a third of what I was expecting.
What were you expecting?
To get a third of the test right.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
What? I AM evil, damnit!
When I go to the bathroom, I leave the toilet seat UP!
Mwahahahahahahaha...
Oooookay...

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Take THIS, evildoer!
Son, time for dinner!
Mom, can't you see I'm busy?
I'm saving the world here!
Put "the world" on hold and come to dinner, young man!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Heh heh, hey little girl, wanna see a dead body?
No thanks. I have a mobile of decapitated corpses in my room. Wanna join them?

 

by Devin
1-22-03
You know what Squall's smiley would look like? This: ^/_^
Whatever. -/_-

 

by Devin
1-22-03
*SCREECH*
Eek!
Oh my god, oh my god, she's dead! Oh geez, if they test me for DUI, I'm doomed!
Wow, she's hot...
I don't wanna go to jail! Let's get the hell out of-- what the hell are you doing down there?!
Hold on, I'll be done in fifteen minutes.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
What?! What do you mean the price of a hammer went up 50 cents? This got-dang inflation's killing America, I'll tell you what.
I guess the only way to fix this problem is to save Dale from the termite queen, who's been replacing humans with her own kind.
...Wow, I'll admit, I never saw THAT coming.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Tales of Destiny 2
I am the mysterious Wonder Chef! I'll teach you how to make a stamina-recovering Beef Stew.
Beef Stew has three ingredients: Bear Meat, Cabbage, and Carrots. Have a nice day!
...Er, where's the beef?

 

by Devin
1-22-03
I was sure I had the funny when I started to write that strip, but after posting I found I had left it in my pants once again.
Oh, THAT must be my problem!
Nobody EVER laughs at my comics, but everybody laughs when I show them what's in my pants!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Shut up, you motherfucking hick!
Shit-faced nigger!
STOP! Derogatory words like "hick" and "nigger" have no place in today's society.
Shut up, you motherfucking Caucasian!
Shit-faced African American!
My work here is done.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
You know, they're bringing Earthbound 64 out to the Game Boy Advance.
Weird.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
The words of science can't compare to that of religion!
What does science have? A whole bunch of hypotheses and theories, which they have to test over and over again!
What does religion have? A concrete foundation of truths laid down by a highly credible source!
We don't need to test our statements, because we KNOW we're right. God says so!
Anyone who disagrees with God's words is wrong and should be disposed of promptly!
Otherwise they'll spread their insane ideas, like "the earth revolves around the sun," and "think for yourself," and all that other junk.

 

by Devin
1-22-03
Hi, I'm calling to join the Game Masters club.
Um, no, I've never played Counterstrike...
AOE? What's that? Do you mean AOL?
What's Quake 3? And were the first two released in Japan or something?
Yeah, I've played Warcraft 3! I just finished the Campaign mode on Easy--
Hello? Hello?

 

by Devin
1-22-03
So what have you heard about DSL?
Ask Roger. He has DSL.
Dick Sucking Lips!
What, fuck you, bitch!

 

by Devin
1-22-03
More tales from Subspace
You know, I feel like I play better in Spectator mode.
Agreed.
Yeah, when in spec I can-- hey, wait a minute...

 

by Devin
1-23-03
We are officially outlawing this Muslim sect for cooperating with neo-Nazi groups to promote anti-Semitism. Germany has no place for this bigotry.
Do you really expect us to believe that a neo-Nazi group would cooperate with ANY minority, and vice-versa?
...We are also outlawing smart-aleck reporters for their dangerously sharp wit. Germany has no place for this questioning of government policies.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
President Bush, you are adamant about ousting Saddam Hussein, yet are eager for peace with North Korea. Isn't this racist policy?
Absolutely not. This has nothing to do with race.
If Hussein had nuclear weapons, I'd be kissing his ass too.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Me when experiencing stripcreator/video game overload
RAAR! TOBAL WILL CORNHOLE YOU!

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Subspace
Let them come! I set up a trap for the 'birds.
~ WARBIRDS SCORE ~
...Man, your trap really WAS for the birds.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Hi, I want to make an appointment to come in with my son for counseling. He's on the computer day and night, it's like a disease!
I'm sorry, but I'm afraid we can't spare any time for that.
What do you mean you can't?! It's your job for crying out loud!
Look, lady, the doctor has one kid who's in a gang, one who steals money to keep up his drug addiction, one who tried to kill his parents, and another who keeps hearing "burn the house down."
You want to switch sons? I'm sure the other parents would be thrilled.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Ugh, look at all this spam... delete, delete, delete, delete--
Huh? "I LOVE TO SOCK DICK?"
Now that's kinkiness to the extreme.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Only one thing keeps me from being considered intelligent--
Your stupidity?
Shut up.

 

by Devin
1-23-03
It-it-it's Jesus, the son of God!
Huh? Who, me? No, I'm just a humble carpenter spreading God's teachings.
Blasphemy! Prepare to burn in Hell, heretic!

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Front desk.
Yeah, I have a complaint!
Why am I sharing a room with the guy who killed me?

 

by Devin
1-23-03
Aw, I'm sorry, you are incorrect. Now you must be drenched in acid!
Aaaaaaarrrggghhh!!!!!
Acsorbic acid, that is! How're you liking that lemonade, by the way?
Well?

 

by Devin
1-24-03
Hey, k-keep away, or I'll be forced to use the Kamehameha wave on you!
Oh, really? Come on, then, tough guy!
Ka... me... ha... me...
HA!
What the? Hey, get back here!

 

by Devin
1-24-03
*gasp* You're, you're not gay!

 

by Devin
1-26-03
A butthead telling the truth
My anus is bleeding!

 

by Devin
1-26-03
What the hell? You just turned down a threesome with two hot women?! You are such a BUTTHEAD, you know that?
Hey, look, my anus is bleeding!

 

by Devin
2-04-03
Yeah, I'm afraid our prices had to go up again, you know, 'cause of hard times.
I've been seeing that all over the place... hopefully the economy picks up soon. Then these prices can go back down to normal.
...HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA, that's a good one! Prices going back down, that's funny!

 

by Devin
2-04-03
Hey little girl, want some candy? I'll give you some if you come home with me.
No! You're going to do unspeakable things to me!
L-like what?
I can't say, they're unspeakable!

 

by Devin
2-04-03
It's normal for businesses to lose money in the first couple of years on new products. For instance, Microsoft is currently losing money on the X-box--
Yeah, Sony forever, baby!
Um, that's not--
Fuck you bitch! X-box is DA BOMB!
Um, really, that wasn't my point...
GameCube rules yo' sorry asses!

 

by Devin
2-04-03
I'm a vegetarian. I don't like the idea of having to take a life for food.
But vegetables are lifeforms too! When you eat them, you take their lives.
...Um, maybe I'll start eating fruits from now on.
But fruits are the children of plants!
...I'll start popping vitamins then.
But don't they extract the nutrients from plants and animals?

Showing page 7.

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