All comics by ObiJo

Profile

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
So why do they call you Big Evil Dan anyway?
I'm not sure.
I think it might be like when they call fat people Slim or tall people Shorty.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
What do you think about puns?
Hate them.
Me too! You know, if you were an orange female donkey I'd snap you up in a minute.
Orange?
Once you go orange, you never go back.
Did not know that.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
I am a simple goat. I live on the back of a pickup truck.
The old man tied me here with a three-foot rope. Am I happy? He don't give a fuck.
Limo's ready.
Always ruining my blues buzz.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Oh, I don't know. Why do you put me on the spot like this?
I mean that whole stealing of the eggs thing sucks.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
I've never been in love.
Shouldn't that be a close-up?
I've never been in love.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
No, all's good actually.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
God, where do I start? Well there's the food shortage in these parts...
...so the dog's eating my wife, my kids are crying and screaming, "Do something daddy!" Well what the fuck am I supposed to do, it's a goddamned dog for chrissakes...
...and finally, Winter.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
I could do without the ball.
Make that the ball and the panties.
Ok, the ball, the panties, and the cucumber.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Manic depression.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Well there's the paranoia.
And of course the ear thing.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Paper cuts.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Johns who stiff me.
None of your lip, Weisenheimer.

 

by ObiJo
9-28-01
Being out of water for long periods.
Hint hint.

 

by ObiJo
9-29-01
What's up, Obi my man. Let's go drink till we see God, then stiff him with the bar tab.
Should a man-on-man experience be mandatory for men?
No.
Getting drunk it is, then.

 

by ObiJo
9-29-01
I don't think I like prison, Gabey.
Call me Killer.
But I've always called you Gabey.
Yes, but we're in prison now. It's fuck or get fucked.
I don't think I like prison, Killer.
It's about to get worse, ObiHo.

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
We don't have an official Stripcreator rulebook to follow! So everyone...
Whatever.
The heck?
They'd like you to tell a few jokes. You are on stage, you know.
Ever hear the one about me sleeping in the most comfortable hotel bed you can imagine? No, wait, that's not how it goes.

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
The singular of men is man. The singular of women is woman. So why isn't the singular of children, childran?
I don't know. Maybe they think it sounds too much like Iran.
Well something has to be done about this. I'm off!
Good luck.
With the shock therapy, you big ball of freakness.

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
Well, I did it!
Yes, I know.
I walked right up to him and said, "I'm Killer's bitch! If your big crusty ass has a problem with that, talk to him." Then I excused myself and started the roast.
I think you also said something about his mother having sexual relations with Maine.
Did I?
That's what he was saying as he picked his teeth with my femur.

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
Did you see that guy over there?
Over where?
Over there, next to the car.
Car?
Yes, the car! Right there, next to the vanilla brontosaur!
You're going to hurt me, aren't you?

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
WHAT?!

 

by ObiJo
9-30-01
When things are going bad, I look back over my life and think what I could have done different somehow.
The murder?
The murder.

 

by ObiJo
10-01-01
If you feel so bad about murdering that guy, why not do something about it?
Do something about it?
It's only been a couple of hours. The ants probably haven't gotten to him yet.
I would, but I've done so much driving today my big toe hurts.
Help?

 

by ObiJo
10-01-01
Some may ask why my hair's like this.
To which I reply: less yappin, more diggin.

 

by ObiJo
10-01-01
Being buried and left for dead has made me realize something.
People should golf more.
And in wide swaths.

 

by ObiJo
10-01-01
Who can tell me what printing breakthrough occured in 1804? Tobor, you can put your hand down if you're just going to scream MANRAPE!!!! again.
All is not manrape?

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
KARAOKE?!! TOBOR CAN'T SING!!! TOBOR'S ROOMMATES ALWAYS DO STUFF TOBOR CAN'T DO!!! TOBOR FEELS LEFT OUT!!! RAAAAR!!!
Trust me this time, big guy.
Later...
You
RAAAAR!!!
So beautiful
To me.

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
Age 5
cornhole! raaar!
Age 15
CORNHOLE!!! RAAAAR!!!
Age 25
NACHOS!!! RAAAR!!!
Anything to drink with that?

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
What's wrong? It's just a little hit. I mean, unless you're scared.
SCARED?!! TOBOR CORNHOLE MERE SUGGESTION!!! PASS TOBOR FIRE STICK!!!
2 Hours later
Dude, we've ALL thought about it, right? Just THINKING about it doesn't make you gay, right? Homefry?
The next morning
Man, you were acting REALLY gay last night.
RAAAAR?

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
Why are you hiding behind that building, Tobor?
I THOUGHT YOU WERE A MUGGER!!!

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
Well, golly, I don't know. I kinda always thought I was only supposed to do that with girls.
Why not try it out a couple hundred times and see if you like it?
BAT SIGNAL!
We'll talk in the car.

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
Seen Benny?
You haven't heard?
Heard what?
Benny evolved legs this morning and walked right out of the ocean. He's calling himself Lungfish now.
WoW
I know. Everyone's talking about it.

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
Jesus! I've gotta work fast if I'm gonna get this strip painted by sunrise!

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
So this is heaven.
Yup.
Somewhat darker than I was picturing.
Yup.

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
You ever think the apocalypse is upon us?
YES!

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
The thing you have to realize about these forums is that we're all slightly crazy. Not a lot. Just slightly. If sane is noon, we're about 2:15 or so.
2:43!
Make that 2:43.
A.M.!

 

by ObiJo
10-02-01
No.
But you let DexX and kaufman in.
I WANT ME!
WHERE IS ME?
I WANT ME!
It's just like when I dream!

 

by ObiJo
10-03-01
This comic is your oasis from all the free porn.

 

by ObiJo
10-03-01
--------That depends on you--------
------------------------------------------------
--------That depends on you--------
Handle me.

 

by ObiJo
10-03-01
1!

 

by ObiJo
10-03-01
============2¢=============
===========================
============2¢=============

 

by ObiJo
10-03-01
-------------------$20------------------------
------------------------------------------------
---------------------$20----------------------
Lucked into an air pocket! Adapted to the pressure. Live off the fish. Discovered an ingenious way to recycle my waste into a dinette set. Even print my own money. Don't try to save me. I WILL resist.

 

by ObiJo
10-04-01

 

by ObiJo
10-04-01
5........................................FEDERAL
5...............................
................................FIVE
THE_UNITED_STRIPS OF PANGEA
RESERVE NOTE...........................5
DOLLARS...........................
..........................5

 

by ObiJo
10-04-01
-----------------1 Nut-----------------------
Oh mighty squirrel, HELP us become more like you.
For HE that is like you WON'T ever stray.
------------------------IN--------------------- -the squirrel who wields an axe- ---------and is clearly insane-----------------------WE TRUST--------------
-----------------1 Nut-----------------------
LET all feel the peace that your random sacrifices bring.
To US there is no higher plane of enlightenment to GO to.

 

by ObiJo
10-04-01

 

by ObiJo
10-04-01
Almost time.
Yep.
Alright, here comes the night shift! Let's go grab a beer!
Dig it.
You the new guy?

 

by ObiJo
10-06-01
Captain, the antimatter uwonstabulliyzit's gone unstable! One more hit and we're done for! We MUST surrender!
Surrender? My ship? I love this ship more than pussy! But alright, damn you, I'll surrender! Hail unknown enemy ship! On screen!
Man, we done turned you OUT.
Ya, you ain't no kind of challenge for the South Side Sturgeons. I mean, antimatter and dilithium crystals? How's the research into the wheel going, you frippin mooks.
This is some kind of joke, right?

 

by ObiJo
10-06-01
They'll say, "Smith, get out of there! We need you to crawl through the Sprach tubes and see how much of your hair falls out."
Or, "We need you to beam down to the Nippletwister homeworld." Or, "We need you to test this bathwater."
But I'll just say, "NO! Not this time, bub! Find yourself a new patsy! I'm not leaving!"
WARNING: HOLODECK MALFUNCTION. SAFETY CONTROLS INOPERATIVE. INITIALIZING FIRE PROGRAM.

Showing page 9.

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