All comics by BartFargo

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by BartFargo
3-19-01
Meanwhile, somewhere outside Los Angeles...
Hi!
KAALTU VERATA NIKTO!
What's that mean?!
KLAATU! -- Huh?!
I asked you what's that supposed to mean robot dude...
Uh, I dunno, I just thought that was some cold hearted s*#! to say to a M*%&^ F@*$&# before I popped a cap in his ass...

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
Hi, welcome to "Cthulu Talk" The weekly celebrity interview show with me, Cthulu a Lovecraftian vision of terror. Today's guest is Brad Pitt, welcome Brad!
Hi, thanks for having me Cthulu.
The "C" in Cthulu is silent Brad.
Oh, sorry about that.
Think nothing of it, are you ready to be torn apart by invisible blades?
Sure am!

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
Welcome to our second half hour of "Cthulu Chat." Now we really excited to have this guy on, everyone welcome our next guest, Jesus H. Christ.
Thanks for having me on Cthulu.
Thank you for coming Jesus. Now I think the big question everyone wants to know is: What does the H. stand for?
It stands for "Hesus" actually.
I thought "Jesus" began with a J.
How much are you paying me again?

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
It's Wednesday night, that must mean it's time for "Cthulu Chat", with me, your host: Chtulu Johnson. Tonight's guest, help me welcome: Jack Kirouac.
It's a pleasure to be here Mr. Johnson.
Please, call me Cthulu. Now Jack, if I'm not mistaken, aren't you dead?
I certainly am.
Have you been enjoying Hell, Jack?
It's like being shot in the groin with a hot riveting gun through all eternity, thanks for asking.

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
My mommy says everybody has a special gift Mr. Cthulhu.
Your Mommy's right Jane.
I can whistle through my teeth. What can you do Mr. Cthulhu?
I can open a portal to the dark dimension directly into a man's soul driving his mind to madness.
Is that what happened to my daddy Mr. Cthulhu?
No, your daddy is just a rummy Jane.

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
This has been the most romantic day of my life Julie.
I'm glad you think so Sara, I put a lot of work into this blind date.
By the way, Phil didn't tell me you were a woman and I'm not actually gay.
That's okay, neither am I.
Phil sure pulled one over on us huh?
You gonna put out or what?

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
The first day of every month...
did you pay the bills?
bills, bills, bills...you mean like electricity?
dammit steve! you're such a loser! i hate you!
would driving a nail into my head make you stop yelling at me?
yes. yes it would.
how deep do i have to go for you to pay my rent too?

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
Praise be to you, Satan...
What ya want tonight, Kid2?
I was just prayin' to thank you 'bout these bitchin' sneaks!
Well, don't thank me, Kid2...Take a look in the next panel.
Oh, hey, lookit that....
Ah, ruch ranks for visiting Nike factory!
I only gots four fingers, 'cause your shoe gots ONE!

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
For those of you just joining us, this is "Cthulu Talk" the the weekly talk show hosted by a Lovecraftian vision of Terror...
"Cthulu Talk" You're on the air!
Hi Cthulu, long time viewer, first time caller. I have a question about last week's show.
Go ahead.
Well it seems since you 'rediscovered' your Orthodox Jewish heritage, you've been even more insufferable than you were when you were a Christian, oh and STERN RULES!!! BA BA BOOEY!!!!
Well screw him, at least I have my own talk show...
*CLICK* Bzzzzzz.....

 

by BartFargo
3-19-01
Are you Jesus, the son of God who became a man to die on the cross for the sins of man?
No I'm Spartacus.
Who's Spartacus?
I hate Jesus.

 

by BartFargo
3-20-01
"Cthulu Chat" the weekly show hosted by, well it's obvious, no?
Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-DA DA-DAHH!!!
Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-DA DA-DAHH!!!
If ratings are as low as they tell me, this sure as hell ain't going to bring 'em up.
Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-da Ya-da-da-DA DA-DAHH!!!

 

by BartFargo
3-20-01
Hi Satan.
Hi Cowboy! Why so glum?
My wife left me today.
Good, she deserved better than you anyway.
Anyone ever told you that you're a mean drunk Satan?
Only all the time.

 

by BartFargo
3-20-01
Hi Satan.
'Sup Cthulu?
I noticed alot of these cartoons are kinda dark.
Yeah, I get that too. There are a bunch of angst-ridden so-and-so's up in here.
Where do you think all that comes from?
Hey, I'm no psychiatrist. Wanna go see how Charles Shultz is doing in the iron maiden?

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