All comics by Cyberpunk

Profile

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
One day at Pike's Place ...
I call this one, "Reversing the Polarity". *hmm mm*
Oh pretty polarity, how I have reversed thee ...
Robot Beat Poets?
AHHHHHHHHHH!
I hate poems. I'm gonna get some Pokemon cards.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
WHAT!?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Hi kids! I'm Republican the Clown! And this is my sidekick, Mr. Missile Defense!
Hey.
So .. uh .. hey kids! Grown any new third limbs?
Hey.
We're pretty fucked right here, huh?
Yup.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Myth.
Dog on a ball.
HAW! HAW! HAW! This one goes to Fark.
... no hand ... need to put nail in head ...

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
What the hell is that? Ain't never seen one o' them 'for.
*whistling*
Is anyone else seein' this? Shiiit. What do I do?
*whistling*
That outta do it. Hooo-doggy, yessir. That did it.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Fucking Frat boy, DIE!
Dude.
Corporate whore, DIE!
Sweet.
That's it for tonight's show, folks. G'night!

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Chicken!
Asian!
Chicken!
Aaaaaaaaaaa-SIAN!
C-H-I-C-K-E-N !!!!
Shut up, PC. I choose you, Asian Porn.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Dude. You're not a lesbian.
Uh, nope. And dude? You're not a chick!
Uh. Aren't you Lez_Femme forever at AOL ?
Sure am. Aren't you Bi-Dildo-Chick at AOL ?
Actually, I'm Satan. Can I buy your soul for 300 free Sprint airtime minutes?
Sold.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Damnit, I'm Godzilla! Run from me you little Japanese girl you!
I'm Native American.
Shit. This isn't Tokyo.
If you run, I won't let my brother throw his tomahawk through your head.
Stupid Americans.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
So, as you can see blood moves through here to the heart -
Through where?
Right over there.
Where?
Hey, my sweatshirt changed color!
Where?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Well, there's our President now ...
!!!!!!!!!
beep
You call that art?
No pants?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
I long for the quiet life.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
hey
yeah, you
HELP

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
aRe YOu oK!?
5 minutes later ...
aRe YOu oK!?
10 minutes later ...
aRe YOu oK!?
Do you ever shut up?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Pssssst, hey dog.
Are you God?
Come closer.
I'm on a ball, it may take some time.
Got any crack?
Woh, time to get the FUNK outta here .. heeeeeey. Help me.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
What are you?
Advanced.
No, really. What are you?
I'm a PIII 1.4G processor and a 17 inch monitor. What are you?
Uh, well -
Shut up.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Freeze kid! Drop the chalupa!
I'm on COPS!?
Sometimes the perp' just won't listen to reason ... so we let Billy hit 'em with the flamethrower.
AAAAAEEEEEEIIIIIII!!!!!
OUCH! OH GOD IT HURTS!!!!
I like the pretty lights.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
God?
If you're there, please let my brother Billy live. Please God?
No.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Please?
No.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
GOD DAMNIT ... WHAT?!?!!?!?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-28-01
Ok, that's it little girl. I've had it.
Ahhh, the solitude of quiet. Thank Me I created it.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
MOSES ... MOSES!!
*singing* I'm saaaaaaailing - come sail away, come sail away with me ... *singing*
MOOOOOOOSES! TURN AROUND ME-DAMNIT!
*singing* She works haaaaard for her money, sooooo hard for her money. *singing*
Ahhh, fuck it. Go be the President of the NRA, see if I care.
*singing* I shot the Sheriff ... but I did not shoot the deputy. *singing*

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
You're still here? Jump back, setcho' self on fire!
Come on man ... twenty bucks ... please?
I'm not giving you $20. You'll just buy crack.
If I promise to buy crack AND a hotdog will you give me $20

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
...I think Advil and M&M need to get together and make a pill that melts in your mouth and not in your hand ...
Hmm.
... I mean, WHAT was Captain Picard thinking? He should've jettisoned the warp core ...
Uh-huh.
... who would've thought a festering wart on my foot would get me $10,000 from Ripley's ...
If I hit him with this hammer, I wonder if he'll stop.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
... I mean it's fairly obvious that a warp nacelle can't be used as a toothbrush but what if ...
Oh, god. Is he talking to -me- ?
... I mean the special effects were cool, but the dialogue was lacking. George Lucas has alienated so many of his fans ...
Oh god. He IS talking to me.
Damn.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
... so it was apparent in the scene in Dune where they met Jean Luc Picard that the Star Trek universe needs to be helmed by -
... that was Patrick Stewart, the actor. Not Jean Luc Picard the character.
I love you.
Sex then?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
My name is Hercules, I'm 6'6", 180 - all muscle. My likes are swimming, hiking, drinking and dancing.
Let's be honest with each other.
Ok.
You're actually a short, bald, fat man with a dorky white shirt and a red bow tie. Your interests are cheetoes, Mountain Dew, D&D and Star Trek. Am I right?
Damn.
I AM evil.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
*sniff sniff*
*sniff sniff*
Damn I need a shower.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
*sniff sniff*
*sniff sniff*
Damn I need a shower.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
Take a picture, for Christ's sake, it'll last longer.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
**RING** **RING**
**RING** **RING**
**RING*** Oh fuck it.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
HEY! Someone answer me!
Yes?
Not you, you're ugly!
Anyone else?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
Where are we?
Am I dreaming?
No, I just asked if you knew where we were!
This must be a dream!
Damnit, Cheney, wake up!
Mommy?

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
Well, I guess this means I won the Pokemon tournament.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
So just how advanced are you, anyway?
So advanced I don't need rabbit ears and tin foil on my head.
Good point.
I know.
Have I told you about my picture tube - ?
Shut up.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-29-01
Ok, but what about all the stuff I have and you don't. Like Jerry Springer.
You can download that.
What about porn?Fox News?Superbowl?Midget wrestling on Channel 42?
Got it.Yup.Got that too.In six different languages.
10 minutes later
What about Lifetime for Women?
Ya got me there.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-30-01
**RING RING**
**RING RING**
Fuck.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-30-01
**RING RING**
**RING RING**
*SIGH*

 

by Cyberpunk
1-30-01
I'd like to thank the Academy ...
... I would never have dreamed in all my days ...
... that I would win Best Supporting Actor for my roll in Backdraft. Thank you all.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-31-01
This will be rated the highest comic on Low Pass.
Really, why?
Well, it's got two very attractive girls (one in a school girl outfit) and will involve a lot of topics on sex and masturbation.
Really? What else will make it a winner?
It'll have the best punchline ever.
Oh, cool.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-31-01
Hey, where's your fish?
I put him in the hyperbolic chamber this morning to boost his carb intake and increase the muscle resistance in his weight training.
Why?
I ate him.
Jerk.

 

by Cyberpunk
1-31-01
The first rule of Fight Club is "You don't talk about Fight Club."
The second rule of Fight Club is--
You don't talk about Fight Club?
Interrupt me again and I'll kill you.
Oops ...

 

by Cyberpunk
2-02-01

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