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| Today Pope Damien announced that it would acknowledge same sex marriages. | |
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| Pope Damien also told reporters that he was in abused as a child by his father and forced to watch re-runs of Bousom Buddies | |
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| Hey I never did that! What a ingrate, what a liar, what an evil man he has become! What a good kid. | |
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| After our interview with Pope Damien he set fire to the Vatican. | |
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