All comics by LadySauron

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
In the recording studio...
Ok, Craig, we're recording. Ready?
*nod* Ready.
My first music production credit. This ought to be good.
Hey, Hugh?
Hmm?
Y'want me to say YOUR name once?

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
In the recording studio...
....Craig David, yo... It's Craig David... Yeah, yeah... Craig David..
...uh huh, yeah Craig David here. Yeeeeah, it's Craig David!
*musical interlude*
yeah.... Craig David baby.... C-R-A-I-G....
Aaaand backwards now.... G-I-A-R-C..
It's gonna be a LONG day.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
In the recording studio...
Ooooh, I've got a new idea!
I'm afraid to ask!
Hi! My name is. *what* My name is *huh* My name is... CRAIG DAVID!
oh my god.
*cough* RIPOFF!
Shut up, Scott Evil!

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
A few hours later...
...Craig Daviiiiiid, yeah yeah yeah, Craig David baby...
erm...CUT! Cut! Excuse me, Mr. David, but we've got five minutes on this track already.
Dude, excellent. Five minutes is a nice length. I guess that's a wrap then. Thanks, Hugh, I'm going home now.
Um...Mr. David...you haven't sung any LYRICS yet!
*blank look*
omfg. I am NEVER doing this again.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
At home in Hugh's mansion...
Oh, Liz. Working with Craig David is driving me insane! I'm never working in the music industry again!
No? Gee, Hugh, that's too bad. Craig called me today, said he had a duet in mind and wanted me to sing in it.
No kidding!
Yeah. I was all excited...He even wrote me a part already? Wanna hear?
Yeah... Liz Hurley, baby! Yeah, yeah. Hey...it's Liz Hurley! L-I-Z...
I think I'm gonna kill myself.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
Second day in the studio...
Okay, Craig. Today, I think we need to do something a little different.
Right, yo. Different?
Yeah. I mean, a song with some kind of a STORY. Something you haven't done before. Originality.
I see... DUDE, I've got an idea!!! Let's say I'm on the subway, right, and then I see this girl. And she asks me what time it is, right?
Originality, Craig.
No, no. See, this one's gonna take TWO weeks, man. She's really holding out on me!

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
Third day in the recording studio...
Oooh, what about this. I'm dating a girl, but her parents are, like, totally WHACK.
Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts.
Hello, I'm talkin' here, Grant.
Sunshine. Butterflies. Computer chairs.
Y'know, I've never said my MIDDLE name in one of my songs! Can you imagine! I think it deserves its own TRACK, man!

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
Fourth day in the recording studio...
Look, Craig. We need a SONG. This is costing the studio thousands of dollars!
Look, Grant, everything I say is no good. Why don't YOU write me a freaking song?
Excuse me, my good friends. My name is Strider, can we hide in here? Our noble fellowship is on a quest to destroy a ring that can ruin the world if it falls into the hands of an evil Maiar!!
...Hey! Dude, that is a FABULOUS idea for a song!
Now you've got it, Craig. A tale of friendship and bravery! A dangerous quest! A PLOT!!!
What are you on about? I was talking about "My name is Strider." Hey, Puff Daddy changed his name, didn't he?

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
An interesting day in the studio...
My friend, I am not joking. We require your immediate assistance!
Right, right. So, anyways. Should my new album be called "My Name Is Strider," or just "Strider?"
*shriek*
*shriek*
For heaven's sake, Mr. David! ! WE NEED HELP!!!
Ooooh! Can I use those things behind you in the video? Dude, it's gonna ROCK!

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
At the Grant residence...
omg, Hugh. You invited NINE people over for dinner!?
Erm.. well... and Craig David, too. He was too freaked out to be left alone after what happened at the studio.
omg, Hugh. You invited TEN people over for dinner!?
Uh...the little ones probably don't eat much?
omg, Hugh. What the HELL is that shrieking noise outside?!
oh crap.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
*shrieking noises in the background*
Strider! You said they wouldn't find us here! What's up with this!?
I don't know, Hugh. I'm sorry, we have no choice now but to fight them again.
Looks like the plan of disguising Gandalf as Santa Claus didn't work out.
I don't understand! How could they have found us so fast? It's like they could tell exactly where we--
Hey, I don't see Craig!
w00t! Check out this ring I found! Um...guys? WHOOA I'm seeing some funky psychedelic shit, man! You should try this!

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
*shrieking noises fading away in the background*
FFS. What is the matter with you, you fool of a Took?! I told you not to touch ANYTHING!
Hey, calm down, dude. Hugh's lighter scared the creepy evil shrieking guys off, it's all good.
Besides, I was just looking after the ring for Frodo. I mean, look at him. His eyes are all weird, he doesn't look so good.
That's cause he's been stabbed by a Mordor blade, you idiot.
Whatever. Y'know, what was that you called me? Took? Think I should change my name to that, instead of Strider?

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
After dinner, the guests chat...
Thank you for your hospitality, Mr. Grant. I don't think we'll have any more trouble.
If Craig David comes up with some freaking LYRICS after this, I'll be thankful enough for this mess.
You know, I rather like this outfit. It's a nice change.
Darling, you could model. Tall people look good on the runway... I have connections in the industry...
Legolas, dude, I'm just so glad those things are gone. THAT was creepy. Now we can get back to discussing my album, and --Heyyy....lookit that sword, it's like, turning blue!
Umm...guys?

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
After Legolas kills half of the Orcs while they're still in another suburb, and Strider takes all the rest of them on by himself (and wins ofc)...
Whoa, now THAT was cool.
Heh. C'mon, it was only 200 to 1. Anyone can do that.
God. I've been to parties in Milan with 5,000 people at them, and there was less mess than this. You guys broke, like, EVERYTHING!
Let's just say it was all Boromir's fault, cause I don't like him.
Whatever happens, don't let Liz look outside. Someone better clean all those dead guys up before morning...
Well...you could just say they're really ugly lawn gnomes.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
As the Fellowship is bidding their new friends goodbye...
Who-hoa! Who are YOU, pretty lady?
I said I was diminishing to the West, but I actually just moved to England and got a new haircut...
My name is Galadriel. I usually give out bottled starlight, but for you, Mr. David, I've brought a book of elven song lyrics. Luckily, there was no such thing as copyright in our Age.
Ooooh, cool! You're a special lady. Hey, want to get a drink tomorrow at nine?
I've got a song idea for him. Say he's got a girlfriend who's parents are not only completely whack, they're ELVES!
Oi, stop making fun of me.

 

by LadySauron
1-17-02
The Farewell...
Well, Gandalf, I guess this is it. I wish you and your Fellowship a safe journey.
Yep. Thanks, m8. As you can see, Mordor is just over there. We'll be there shortly if we take the Underground.
You mean through Moria?
Pfft. No, that didn't quite work the way we planned last time. I mean the subway, dear boy. Sigh, anyways. Off we go, may the Force be with you, young Jedi.
?!?!
Soz. I sometimes get my movies mixed up.

 

by LadySauron
1-19-02
Hugh Grant attends an important record-launch party, where he presents Craig David's finished album...
So, you produced Craig David's new album, huh?
Yeah... it was an interesting experience. *eyeroll*
Hard work, Grant. It's hard to come up with anything truly original these days. Y'know, something truly BRILLIANT.
I hear you, m8. We went through some difficulties in that area, I can tell you.
So many generic, repetitive artists out there...as a producer it's refreshing to hear something original.
His cover of the Doop Doop song is probably the most original thing on this album.

 

by LadySauron
1-19-02
At the album launch party...
Choosing the first single is a key element to a successful album launch.
I don't think we've quite decided yet.
Let's look at the track list... Fourteen Days; My Girl Has Weird Parents; The Craig-Doop Song; Craig & Liz; My Name is Craig David...
*cough* Yes, all of those have, erm, strong potential as singles, I think, and, erm...
WTF?! The last 10 tracks appear to have some odd, squiggly writing for titles.
My career is over.

 

by LadySauron
1-19-02
At the album launch party...
omg. Sod off, you annoyingly pretentious record-label exec
Craig David's new album is the worst thing I've heard since the FIRST Doop Doop song.
Great chatting with you, m8, your input was valued.
I'm sure the album will be a hit, just like this party. I heard even Prince Harry was going to be here!
...and THEN I put on the ring, and saw all this wickedly cool psychedelic shit. It was like the room was swirling around, everything went blurry...
Oh, I TOTALLY know what you mean, Craig! That happened to me just last week!

 

by LadySauron
2-06-02
Is it just me, or does he get more deranged all the time? *ph34r*
Ohhhh... for crying out loud. Damn you, Rosario! I'm only going to say this ONE MORE TIME. Okay? Okay. Now LISTEN!!!!
The week begins with MONDAY. Not Tuesday, not Wednesday, not Thursday, and NOT FRIDAY!
*eyeroll* Sigh. Don't make me have to strike you with the plague again.

 

by LadySauron
2-07-02
What Nationality Are You?
Wtf, this doesn't work. Stupid, annoying !#$*% quizthing
Oh wait, I forgot I like Corn Pops
w00t, I'm Irish!

 

by LadySauron
2-07-02
Blue's not only pointless, but now also senseless Adventures
Umm... if I'm really Irish... then where is the chair?
tool

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