All comics by MisfitUriel

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by MisfitUriel
6-06-03
'ey mista. What ya read'ns?
A letter from my dear wife Poop. It seems she thinks our marriage is swirling into an abyss of dark and blueish toilet water.
I can only compare my sorrow to that of Jesus christ having to poop but not being able to, on the cross.
(farting sounds....) OH DEAR GOD!
WOw. LoL WhAt A MeSsEd ^ GuY. I bEtTeR gO SpY oN SiS iN dA SHoWeR.
Do you understand now oh sweet innocent child? Oh loving and humane child of light? Don't yo-... HEY! WHERE'D THAT LITTLE BITCH GO!?

 

by MisfitUriel
6-06-03
As Sunlight begins to Invade the darkness, Pondering minds congregate to consider the outstanding questions of the universe.
WWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAASSSSSSSSSSSAAAAAAAAPPPPPPPP!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
Well actually I'm wondering why we, as free and liberated stick figures in this Great Nation of Stripcreator are confinded to such small squares. I do not have time for your immature antics, young one
Why not Oh most Idol of my Idols? I only wish to entertain you. And really..are you blind? We just broke that chains of oppression and spread the box edges of freedom!!
We are Rebels, aren't we, Young one? We better make good of this time of peace and space.
LET'S DO THE ROBOT!!!!!!!!!!!!
I gIve UP...PleASE DON't huMp ME...

 

by MisfitUriel
6-06-03
Oh...I am sooooo Evil. sooo sooooo Evvvviillllllll. Just look at me. Do I not look evil enough to be considered the evilest cartoon ever? My ego is evily delicious. I am soooooo evvvvviiiiilllllll.
Not for long pretty boy. WHen i'm threw with you you're gonna look worse than Leonardo DeCRAPio humping YO' MAMA
You Will Never defeat the power of EVVVVVIIILLLL. (Santa) EVIL SHALL NEVER TRIUMPH OVER SANTA!
I better end this now.
TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS IN....Return of the Evvvvvviiiillll
HAHA EVIL TRIUMPHS! I AM SOOOOO EVVVVIIILLLLLL.. SOOOO SOOO EVVVIILLL...
Maybe I should draw him good. I don't like his stupid Ego...He reminds me of the french.

 

by MisfitUriel
6-06-03
We find out young hero of this comic quietly thinking about UBER large questions again. Let's see what unravels today
1 potato, 2 potato, 3 potato...4.....DAMN what's next?
'ey mista. Have you ever felt your heart STRAINING to pump blood through your body while you were just coincidently eating Pizza hut pizza at the same time?
Why Yes, young one. I am feeling that right now..my heart is beating at about 125 BPM right now. Either It's about to explode or it's playing Dance Dance Revolution and all my organs are invited!!!!
DDR? What's that? It sure does sound like an asian conspiracy to make Americans more squinty eyed and go blind so they can take over our homeland with ease. Godzilla takes up 2 much space in Hong Kong
(Read last)And the moral of the story is... Pizza Hut and Asia are secretly allied against America and will soon take over Canada to control the import and export of Canadian slaves in our poop mines.
Yes, most open-minded of the young ones. Their deeper seizure inducing graphics and animations are slowly killing off our top officials who play DDR and watch Yu Yu Hakusho constantly.
I succeed once again in foiling their plot for world domination. Maybe we should look close to home for a celebration restaurant that won't kill us or make us stupid. Want some Pizza hut?

 

by MisfitUriel
6-07-03
Narrator: Since I never introduced our 2 main characters before..the one on the left is Adrian, and the one on the right is his asian friend Alan. Let's watch as these 2 locos do their thang.
Dear Adrian Yanez, We are proud to inform you that aside from scoring a 1400 on your SATs you are also being awarded the award for being spanish award. Congratulations on your acheivement and goodluck
Heyyyy buuuuuuddyy. How you doin' ? what's that you're read'n, another letter from poop? or is it a letter from Bargaintuan apologizing for being an ass? It's that isn't it? mhmm. He best b apologizn
It's a letter from the college board. I scored a 1400 on my SATs and apparently i'm being awarded the award for being spanish award.
WOAH HOLY FREAKING JESUS. ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!?! YOU'RE HISPANIC? I thought you were Native American, man. Jeez, How long have I known you? 5 years? whoo-whee. Am I one retarded asian stick figure.
Here..Look at the letter. Yea...1400 on my SATs. I should write a letter to my dear wife poop telling her of my acomplishments.....next comic.
Actually...I remember I thought you were Asian when I first met you. Maybe fillipino, but Hispanic? no way. Hey uh...dude. Since you're spanish now and all...Where do you hide your drugs?

 

by MisfitUriel
6-07-03
Adrian, make sure to read over your letter to poop before you send it so that we can flashback in the next frame and make this strip funny, ok?
Dear Poop, Oh my Love. My one and only Principessa, I've done it. I've scored a 1400 on my SATs. Now I can go out into the world and make something of myself for us..us..again. We can put past behind
Flashback on Adrian's past
GOD DAMMIT JESUS! GET THE HELL OFF THAT! I HAVE TO FINISH THAT DOOR FRAME FOR THE ROMAN EMPEROR OR ELSE HE'LL HAVE THE LIONS RAPE ME IN MY SMALL ANAL PASSAGE FOR HIS AMUSEMENT.
Awwwwww C'monnnnnn. It's not like you're going to accidently nail me onto this thing or something. I like swinging on it. Besides it looks nothing like a door frame, it's more like a plus sign. LOSER
So what happend next? Did he stop?
Well as I recall he added on that even if I tried to nail him up with some sort of futuristic nail gun or something, that his father would stop me or something. So I tried and accidently nailed him up

 

by MisfitUriel
6-09-03
Why are you driving a nail through your head oh most idol of my idols?
I just realized that I have no physical mass or existance in this universe aside from that of some stupid hispanic's stick figure character. I am being used by the world, FOR FREE.
Really? Wow. That makes me think about my present state of non-existance in this universe. I wonder..If I die...would I really be missed? Would my death cause anyone grief? Would I really...be gone?
Well then Join me oh most Idolist of my idolists and we shall embark into the unknown of Stick Figure afterlife together as an idol and an idolist should.
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA they're dead. No one cares if stick figures die.
Wow, are we dead? I've been thrown into a trashcan...I guess no one cares. I guess no one even knows about us..I guess I truely am alone in the world.
Speak for yourself bitch. I'm outta here, I gotta go find some dead chicks to score with.

 

by MisfitUriel
6-09-03
In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth, and it was good.
But there was a darker side. A place where hell and earth met. Some refer to it as the Eternal Abyss, but most know it as...
Hell sucks.
Word.
The place where Edgar works.
Sí Señor.
Can I get more American cheese on my Quesadilla?

 

by MisfitUriel
6-09-03
Stolen Script for Idol Hands 2...
haaaaannzzz...HANNNZZZZ....thisss iss yourrr handddd. Killlll Jewwwwssss.... Killlll jeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwsssssssss....
HOLY ALLAH, MAN! IS YOUR HAND TALKING TO YOU?
NO! I WILL NOT KILL JEWS! I REFUSE TO TURN INTO SUPER-NAZI HANZ!!!
Do not deny your german heritage hanz. I do not deny my heritage of sleeping in caves
ZIEN NEIN! my stunner attack will incinerate any jew within a 2 inch radius of me.
PRAISE TO BE ALLAH I AM DEAD. I am one smoldering pile of jewish arabian. YOU MUST BE THE EGYPTIAN MAGICIAN HANZ! YOU GOT ZE POWER!

 

by MisfitUriel
7-08-03
Why is it that our creator has forgotten about us for so long?
Why is it that I seem to be a mirror image of you?
...
...
you're gay
no, YOU'RE gay

 

by MisfitUriel
7-09-03
One day whilst cruising around funky town, go-go the red-eyed robot came upon Fingore the red robot.
What's the matter Fingore? Did your GOD DAMN PENTIUM 4 PROCESSOR MELT AGAIN OR IS IT JUST MY IMAGINATION THAT INTEL SUCKS?
No, it's not that...It's just....Just that....that I JUST REALIZED THAT I DON'T HAVE SEXUAL ORGANS!! wwwwwwhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!! (wails like a little british lad whose socks are on fire)
Oh...well, cheer up buddy. You have a farm and you love farming...so you can farm 4eva!! cause that's what robots do. Live 4eva. You have lots of chickens right? you love chickens Fingore.
Yea, you're right!!! That's great! STUPID british. They can't screw up farming for me! I'll have a new name too!!! Sir Fingore Lots...chickens. DAMN.
Hmm... I see your problem.
God damn british wankers, building me without sexual organs and ruining farming for me forever, 4EVA! bloody hell.

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