IB5: Instructions on Owning a Human

Author: NowhereMan

Date: November 18, 2002

by NowhereMan
11-18-02
First, I try to find a guy who is near suicidal. He knows he is worthless, and my prodding will push him over the edge!
This one seems sorrowful and stupid enough. Now commencing ownage...
Woe am I...
Then, I make him KNOW he is worthless, and I convince him that he should just stop wasting space.
You are only fit to wipe my robotic anal sphincter, which is seldom wiped because I AM A ROBOT AND I DO NOT MAKE WASTE. END YOURSELF!!!
You're totally right, dude. Also, I'm gay and ugly and have no penis so nobody loves me.
Then, they hopefully own themselves while I get away quickly. To mark my ownage, I leave goats in my place.r
Baahhhh.