True story. Honest.

Author: TomCerveaux

Date: December 13, 2001

by TomCerveaux
12-13-01
In order to complete his background reading Cthulhu rereads "The Hobbit".
So, after they Gandalf showed up and distracted the trolls, Thorin son of Thrain Oakenshield and his band of Dwarves plundered the trolls hide out.
Satan warned me about this.
And they find two swords, of fine craftsmanship. Gandalf examines them, and pronounces them to be of Elven make. They are two mighty swords, Orcrist, and Glamdring!
This is worse than he said!
Orcrist, which Thorin kept, is an elvish name, which, roughly translated, means "Orc Smasher". Glamdring, which Gandalf kept, is called in elvish "Foe Hammer". These were such famous blades-
Shut the fuckUP!