All comics by canadianphil

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by canadianphil
10-13-03
What a night, last night. Ohh..my head hurts.
Another hangover, Phil?
Yup. I LOVE YOU MIMI!
I LOVE YOU TOO, PHIL.
To be continued..
Let's kill Phil, Joe.
LET'S DO IT NOW!

 

by canadianphil
10-13-03
We are going to make a bomb!
Ok.
Wait, let's not kill Phil. Let's make sandwiches.
Fair enough.
"We are not going to kill you, we are going to make sandwiches.. Sorry. - Mimi and Joe" Sounds like a good deal.

 

by canadianphil
10-20-03
HI JONNY.
I swear, I didn't try to kill you.
Stop staring at my crotch
No can do.
Will Phil DIE?! Will his pancake stash run out? Find out in the next comic!!
Hey Lucy, can you get the nail out of my head? I did the suicide attempt thing again.
No can do.

 

by canadianphil
10-26-03
How will I get this nail out?!
Have A Nail stuck in your head? Just come down to your local Nail Stoppers location
What can I say? You guys just know how to pull out a nail. *laughs*
Just shut up and give me your money, loser.

 

by canadianphil
12-29-03
Asphyxia is gone!! Why, God, Why?
It's just a travesty to lose a place full of great people..
I jus--
-- Why don't you just shut up, you loser?

 

by canadianphil
12-30-03
Jonny, How do you do get all the ladies?
Well, you see, all you got to do is be your self! Then you don't have to worry about anything!
So, uh, would you like to go out with me?
Uh..
You lied to me, Jonny!
Ha ha ha ha! I knew you'd fall for it, you gullible boy, you.

 

by canadianphil
1-03-04
Hmm.. Marin Gardens. I think I'll buy the property. I guess I'll just walk around a bit more..
Hold it Right there. You've landed in the wrong territory.
Excuse me?
A few minutes later..
What did I do wrong?! This is false imprisonment!
DO NOT PASS GO. DO NOT COLLECT $200. GO STRAIGHT TO JAIL.

 

by canadianphil
1-03-04
Where is Cyclops?!
HE KILLED YOUR MOTHER!! HAHA!
Meanwhile..
EEE HONHK
Why yes, that's exactly where I want to go!
Damn, No wonder all stripcreator comics suck... they just don't make any bloody sense!

 

by canadianphil
1-06-04
Holy Jeez, you're Brad Pitt! And you're dressed like Tyler Durden. Hi I'm Phil!
Hey, Phil. I just decided to go through my closet of movie wardrobe, and I found this. Thanks for reminding me it's from Fight Club.
And Look! We're in the same city!
Wow, what a coincidence. Hey, I'll give you an autograph, and this pink soap bar, and then you'll leave me alone, freak.
Wait, Brad! I have so many questi-- Aw, Crap.

 

by canadianphil
1-08-04
Forgive me father, for I have sinned. I have murdered several people in alleyways over the past 45 years.
Ah, don't yeh worry 'bout that, me lad. Jus' pray the hail mary 5 times and all is forgiven.
What a relief! Thank you, father.
Ah no problem, me lad. Now just sit in me lap, and I'll help yee pray.
Officer!! Father D. Merit wanted to molest me!
I said I wanted a BIG MAC. BIG MAC! Teenagers these days... they just don't listen.

 

by canadianphil
1-24-04
Who are you, and what are you doing in my bedroom?!
I AM KOLBOR 9300! I AM PROGRAMMED TO DO SIMPLE TASKS.
Finally, I'm getting some respect here.. Okay, I'd like you to get me the remote for the TV.
ERROR! ERROR! CANNOT SERVE LOSER.
God, now people, robots, pigs, roosters, and monkies hate me.
And don't forget elephants!

 

by canadianphil
2-12-04
Dear Journal: I had a sandwich today.. boy was it good. Then I talked on the phone with a telemarketer.. at least he likes talking to me. He understands my true gothic skater lifestyle.
Next Day..
OOH! Some people replied to my journal!
Hey xdeathlyxboringx. No one cares about you, or your stupid sandwich.

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