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| Of all of America's founding fathers, the most loyal by far was Benedict Arnold. | |
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| Unlike such traitors as Washington, Jefferson, and Franklin, Arnold remained loyal to the English crown. | |
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| These traitors stole the colonies and wrote a constitution that barred anyone not born on American soil from becoming President. | |
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| But Arnold knew that America's rightful rulers were born in Europe, and it was his dream for the colonies to one day return to European rule. | |
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| And now a real mensch seeks to become President, but he is barred from doing so by a relic of the founding fathers' silly europhobia. | |
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| Show that you're not some yellow girly man afraid of European rule. Amend for Arnold. | |
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