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| Congratulations on beating the bigamy rap, Archie. | |
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| Thanks, Trevor. I'm sure excited about getting back to the recording studio. | |
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| I'm sorry, Archie. Adolescent girls want a superstar they can imagine marrying some day, not someone who's been in jail for bigamy. | |
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| What will I do now? Am I all washed up? | |
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Well, you could do commercials.
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| I'm Archie Andrews. I used to think premarital sex was wrong, but I learned my lesson. Now I don't go marry every woman I want to have sex with. I just put on a Trojan instead. | |
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| I'm Cheryl Blossom, and I won't do a guy without a Trojan. C'mere Archie, sugar sugar. | |
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