All comics by mach17

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by mach17
3-26-02
Guysmiley: i herd harm liex teh poo.
Mach17: i herd that too.
Santa: God forbids people from liexing teh poo.
Spade: i liex teh poo too.
DarkRain: poo si losar
Benneh: poo si winnar

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Guysmiley: i herd harm liex teh poo.
Mach17: i herd that too.
Santa: God forbids people from liexing teh poo.
Spade: i liex teh poo too.
DarkRain: poo si losar
Benneh: shut up fgt,. poo si winnar

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Thundar: I knows my naem si an oxymoron, stop making fun of it!!
Mugsy: Sorry. I'm even naemed after a midget basketball player :(
Mach: HAI. MY NAEM SI l33t. I GO AT MACH17.
Hot babe: Yay! Let's make wub.
DarkRain: My naem sux. It lacks creativity and ya, i'm gay.
Angelus: Yess'm, that's corract.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Izy approaches a chic.
IZY: Hai I'm izy; wanna maek wub?
Hot babe: Negative. Izy fgt
Mach17 approaches teh same chic
Mach17: Hai babe. Wanna fux?
Hot babe: SURE!
Izy: Why can't I get teh chix?
DarkRain: Cuz izy fgt.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Let's maek lesbian love

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Wies One: Teh wise one says to wub, not h8
Mach17: Swedes are ignorant fgts.
Masako: !kb izy
Izy: *CREI*
Spaed: Masako 432 - Izy 0
Snipa: w00t

 

by mach17
3-26-02
OW! That si hurt!! MEH PANIS!! CREI*~!

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Who would win in a fight between DarkRain and SKS?
DarkRain: HAI. I r a gay asshole.
SKS: HAI. I LEAKS TEH DOD!
WUT?
OMFG.. THEY'RE GAY!@!@!#!!
*suck*
*kiss*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
This si Izy on teh Internet
OMFG. I've conviced the world that I'm a guy. W00T
EVIL PLAN SI UNDERWAY
Where do yuo live, izy?
Izy si lose.. again
*CHOP* *KICK* *CHOP*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
DRUGS R WIN
Mach17: NEGATIVE
Masako: Drugs cause impotency, and shrinks teh ball size
DarkRain: Drugs didn't do anything to meh

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17 visits Canada
Kettch: I liev in an igloo, and I eat teh whale blubber
Mach17: is that so?
Salso: OMFG.. CHIX IN CANADA? FAPFAPFAPFAPFAPFAPFAP
YES.. CANADA SI WIN.. *MAEKS WUB*
w00t.. it si mach.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
CS NEWB: Hai. DoD si lose. CS si win.
TylerDurden: NEGATIVE. YOU SI LOSE!
CS NEWB: *dies*
TylerDurden: W00T. Removing fgts from #dod since 1.0

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Izy: *crei* They found out!
Mach17: found out what?
Izy: That I .. I can't say..
Mach17: wut? pretended you were a catholic preiest to molest little boys?
Awesome idea :o
Mach17: blah.. TELL ME!

 

by mach17
3-26-02
God speaks
God: Each time you masturbate, I kill a kitten.
Mach17: OMFG ALL THOSE KITTIES! *CREI*
*CREI*
[48th]Kame: There.. there... there are million of kitties.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Newb: /joins #dod.
Newb: Harro? Harro?
Salso: WWW.GOATSE.CX
Newb: EEW.. THAT'S FUCKING NASTY

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17: Excuse hot ladie flight attendant miss. Where's teh condom maschieene?
*SLAP*
hmmmm
Mach17: How do I get teh chix liek yuo?
Livinghell: That's $45 please

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Izy: OMFG I R TEH SUICIDE BOMBER TERRORIST DUED.
Gah.. work you stupid bomb
*dies*
A Jewish person: LAFF!

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Whar's everyone?

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Masako: I herd izy liex teh kok
Izy's Mom: NOO!O!O!@O!O!O
*sucicide plz* *dies*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17: I R TEH NEXT PRESIDENT. WILL YOU VOTE FOR MEH?
*silence*
*crei*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Spaed: Hai.
*crei*
Spaed: Why si averyone running away from meh?
Mach17: Cuz.. You r teh smelleh mehican

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17: JESUS SAVES! BUT GRETSKY SCORES ON TEH REBOUND!

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17: Why was the Swede so happy after he finished the jiggsaw puzzle in six months?
Engineer: Uh.. I don't know
Mach17: Because the box said 2 - 4 years.
Engineer: GAHAHAHHAHAHHA
Engineer: Plz.. Mach17 643 - Izy 0

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Bush: I WILL BE RASING TEH TARIFFS ON TEH STAEL
*crei*
Russia: FINE! WE DON'T WANT YOUR CHIKENS THEN!!!
*crei*
Izy: Don't worry. I'll maek wub to you.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
SectorEffector: DAS IS TEH PILLEMAN
German chic: Wut's that plz?
Sector: Nevermind. Let's just maek wub.
Yay! w00t!
Mach17: Sekstor effecsktor si win!

 

by mach17
3-26-02
fen gay
spewn fgt
fen gay
spewn fgt
*dies*
!kb fen

 

by mach17
3-26-02
www.goatse.cx
Newb: Wut si gaotse?
*dies*
Salso: GJ.. I win

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Curator: OMFG. Must maek dodhq good.
Message from Mach17.
Mach17: HAI. DODHQ STILL SUX. BUNKARS WIN. DODHQ LOSE.
*crei* Mach si right
*dies*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
fen gay
spewn lose
fen gay
spewn lose
!kb fen gay
spewn win. *crei*

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Masako: God, I hate my naem. It makes me sound liek im a chinese commie.
Enclave: HEY! :(
Snipa: It's at least better than "snipa." Damn that's unoriginal.
Zorn: Atleast your name wasn't "squeaky"
Austin_Powers: OH YA BABEY..
ALL: Laff! :D

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Angelus: WASABI?
Zales: WASSSSSSSSSSSSSSABI?
Curator: GOATSE GOATSE GOATSE GOATSE
Mach17: Ahk.. We have an infiltrator! ALARM!
Austin_Powers: OHH YEAH BABEY!
Kettch: blah.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Mach17: Harro. Remember the days when DoDMod's RN was actually funny?
Sgt.Sheafer: No. I don't
Mach17: Ya, you did a good job ruining it.
Sgt.Sheafer: OMGOMGOMGOMG. GOATSE GOATSE GOATSE
Mach17: *CREI* What happened to meh RN?
Sgt.Sheafer: OMGOMGOMGOMG. GOATSE GOATSE GOATSE

 

by mach17
3-26-02
HAI
HAI
why are you looking at me like that? are you a dike?
Negative. I just... uh..
So are you!
Oh ya... let's maek wub

 

by mach17
3-26-02
DoDHQ: Hai. I liek kok
Ramen: Sure ya do.
DoDHQ: OMGOMGOMGOMGOMG. Bunkars
Ramen: Yeah.. at least the Bunkers is targeted towards the people of higher intelligence.
DoDHQ: WUT MAEKS YOU THINK WE R NOT INTELEEGENT?
Ramen: Um.

 

by mach17
3-26-02
Tacos: Being fat has its advantages.
Mach17: How so?
Tacos: Well..uh...
Mach17: ?
Tacos: I am an actual statistic. See! Isn't that cool?
Mach17: Um.. if you say so

 

by mach17
3-27-02
Sharon: You've started the violence. It's all your fault
Arafat: Nope, It's yours damnit.
Sharon: No, yours!
Arafat: No, yours!
*punch* *kick*
Homeless guy: Bah.. morons!

 

by mach17
3-27-02
WIE: Hi. I am the leader of WIE. After ten betas, we finally got a releasable version with our OWN artwork!
Masako: Good for you.
Masako: Your models still suck, though!
WIE: Neg! Our weapons our "as good as ass".
Mach17: Laff.. "Good as ass."
Hot babe: Well, you r teh "good as ass" plz :)

 

by mach17
3-27-02
BENNEH: Hi. Don't you just hate how newbs have ruined DoD?
BooyAkasha: EH? Yeah.. EH? I liek meh whale blubbar. EH? It's in this bag plz. EH?
Donner: *fart*
Angelus: BLAH. You've smelled up teh room! *crei*
Kettch: EH? What's that stench? EH?
Mach17: It's teh donnar and whale blubbar plz.

 

by mach17
3-27-02
Kettch: EH? Where are you from? EH?
BooyAkasha: EH? In canada. EH? You're from there too right? EH?
Kettch: EH? HOW DID YOU KNOW? EH?
BooyAkasha: EH? I guess I got it from the way you talk. EH? It's just me and my whale blubbar now. EH? Waiting for a hot chix to come. EH?
*DROOL*
Babe: Hai. Why are you drooling? I r American. I guess you guys don't have teh babes in Canada

 

by mach17
3-27-02
RoboCOP: Hai I've come to maek goood in teh world, and promote world peace. First, Sharon and Arafat.. end teh hate.
Sharon: NEVAR. DIE CLOWN!
Arafat: YOU F00!
I guess if I fail at making world peace, I can become a male jigalo.

 

by mach17
3-27-02
Salso: Yes, I'm a 14 year old girl.
Teen: Hai. You sound l33t. Wanna date?
Mach17: Yah! I remember when that happened. Wut exactly is the moral of that story? Don't trust who you chat with?
No. Just the fact that salso si wierd.
Mach17: DEJA VU!
WUTFUX YOU WANT?

 

by mach17
3-27-02
This is the story of passover (Muslims celebrate this religion too). For thousands of years, Jewish (teh good Jews, atleast ;D) people in Egypt were being persecuted by an evil, powerhungry Pharoh.
Moses: *crei* why teh h8?
Pharoh: Cuz you sux. You're supposed to pray to teh meh, not God (Allah, wutever).
Moses, tired of the persecution, decided to desert Egypt.
Moses: Let's go Jews! There's a River. Please seperate teh river. Thanks. Bye.
*dies*
Thousands of years later...
Kettch: Why si the holiday called passover?
Mach17: Cuz, every year, I pass cum on over to yir mom.

 

by mach17
3-27-02
Snipa: Hey R5, is there really an elite counter-terrorism squad named Rainbow Five?
RainbowPhive: Yes.. I lead it.
RainbowPhive: *pow* *whap
*dies*
RainbowPhive: Whoops! I forgot to tell you, that was G-5 Classified Information.
*groan*

 

by mach17
3-27-02
Mach17: Is it true that UMN computer scientists started Gopher Internet?
Zales: Yesh.
Mach17: Wow.
Zales: ?
Mach17: And I thought all along UMN graduates were allowed to cheat through college. Surprising they were actually useful to society.
Zales: Nope.. so what if my entire basketball team cheated? UMN IS STILL A .. GOOD.. SCHOOL!

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