All comics by monster_zero

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by monster_zero
9-28-02
As all too often happens, Brad Pitt finds a beatnik in his secret underground hideout.
Excuse me, Sir. How would you like to step inside my sex machine?
The sexiest man alive, man.
Beatniks should be more careful when dealing with Brad Pitt.
What's a sex machine for, man?
Once again, beatniks should be more careful when dealing with Brad Pitt.
This.

 

by monster_zero
9-28-02
Stick em up,Turd!!!
I'll have you know that I own a Bowflex.
Oh, sorry...nice abs.

 

by monster_zero
9-29-02
Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina.
Whatchootalkinbout, Willis?!?
We've got to go back! Back to the future!!!
You hear that hillbilly boy! I ain't through wit you by a sight! I'm gonna get medieval on yo ass!!!
I'm sorry Miss Jackson, HOOOO!!!
I know it was you Fredo. You broke my heart.

 

by monster_zero
9-29-02
All the Who's down in Whoville liked Christmas a lot. But the Grinch, who lived just north of Whoville, did not.
That better not be a bomb, or I'm gonna stick this carrot up your ass, you Grinchy little fuck!
OH SHIT!!! He's on to me!!!
The Grinch said you threatened to rape him with your nose again. SON OF A BITCH, FROSTY!!! What the fuck is wrong with you?
How bout I stick it up your fat ass, you fucking jiggly sack of shit?
Uhh, that won't be necessary Frosty. Umm I'll um speak to the um Grinch. Uh, sorry to bother you , sir.

 

by monster_zero
9-29-02
GRRRRRRR!!!
I must be hallucinating again.
Try it now, risk free for no money down and payments as low as $33 a month.
I'm in better shape at 52 than I was at 22. I wish I could have gotten a Bowflex 40 years ago.
I'm wearing a Nike shirt.

 

by monster_zero
9-29-02
At an abandoned campsite, a carelessly discarded cigarette starts a forest fire.
YEEEEHAAAAAA!!! Smokey the Bear can kiss my stinkin red ass!!!
The small woodland creatures fear for their safety.
Holy shit!!! This looks like a job for Capain Piss!
Yes, Captain Piss- virtuous defender of the weak and hater of vagrants.
And let that be a lesson to all you vagrants! Captain Piss away!!

 

by monster_zero
9-29-02
The devil went down to Georgia. He was looking for a soul to steal.
I'm all sticky sweet, from my head down to my feet!
I can make all your dreams come true, my young friend. Just ask and it will be yours.
He was in a bind, he was way behind, he was willing to make a deal.
Dude! Can you really give me anything I want?
All that and more, my young friend.
Luckily, Jake was an idiot, and the transaction went through without a hitch.
I don't think this was part of the deal, dude.
Heh, heh, heh. Most unfortunate, but now your soul is mine.

 

by monster_zero
10-02-02
Hello.
Good morning, ma'am. I'm here today with an exciting new opportunity in the home dungeon field.
I'm sorry. Our old dungeon still works just fine.
That may be, but does your old dungeon have stretching racks, nipple clamps, a penis crusher...
DEAR GOD, WOMAN!!! Is that an SRX-3000 Orifice Gouger?!?
Yes. I bet you don't see one of those every day. Mr. Jones is particularly proud of that one.

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