All comics by Gumby

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by Gumby
2-20-02
The visit
George! What are you doing here?
I don't know... I just felt like visiting you that's all, Mayene. What's up?
Nothing really, just hanging around doing homework! Wanna come inside?
Whoa... is she coming on to me? Score! This is gonna be my chance!
Not that way you perv!
Do you want me to take off your pants now?

 

by Gumby
2-20-02
I was meaning to ask you something Toothy...
Go ahead.
Why are you a talking goat?
That's like asking me why do I have two penises.
Those are your horns.
Bend over and we'll find out.

 

by Gumby
2-20-02
Hi my name is Liquid Blue!
Nice mullet.
Do you want to play DDR?
You have a mullet. No.
Who are you again?
I'm Liquid Blue!

 

by Gumby
2-22-02
I hate my life, suicide is the only answer!
Paul! What the fuck are you doing?!
I'm commiting suicide! No one likes me! I don't have a girlfriend! I'm so ugly! Why shouldn't I do this?
That's great... but what are you doing using MY nails? Fuck, I'm gonna kick your ass if I catch you using them again without my permission!
Go to hell. *cry*

 

by Gumby
2-22-02
Mayene! Hey, how ya doing? You wanna talk?
Umm.. I hafta go... I'm kinda busy, but we can talk later... bye.
Later that afternoon...
Yeah, she said she was busy AGAIN! Can you believe that?
Oh.. I'm so sorry George, I'm sure everything will be okay. Don't give up! Let's go into the kitchen and get something that'll make you think about it less okay?
Haha! You got shut down again? Loser!
Will you shut the fuck up! Now excuse me while I commit suicide. *cry*

 

by Gumby
2-22-02
I'm so worthless! When I jump off this building, it will all be over! Finally, I can stop worrying about my horrible act!
Hey there! Stop this instant! Don't commit suicide, there's lots of things worth living for! What on earth happened that would cause you to want to take your own life?
I jacked off to a picture of Janet Reno.
Agh! What the hell are you still doing here then? Jump off already!
Yes sir.

 

by Gumby
2-22-02
One year earlier...
What a great christmas tree! Diana is going to love this! This is going to such a wonderful Christmas!
One week ago...
DIANA! You can't die! Why did this happen to me?! My life isn't worth anything anymore... you were my life! God, why?! I'm sorry I couldn't save you Diana... I'm sorry! *cry*
Kill yourself already, you pussy! You have nothing to live for! Do it!
You're right, I'm so *cry* worthless! I'm killing myself! GOODBYE WORLD!

 

by Gumby
2-22-02
Alright soldier! You know what to do with that flag once you find one of those damn yankees!
Stick it up his ass sir!
We are going to win the war! Down with the north! Slavery is winner!
YES SIR!
5 years later...
HAHAHA! You can't even win a war against your own country?! What kind of general are you?!
*cry*

 

by Gumby
2-23-02
Hell yeah, I got the flag!
Shit!
Hehehehe you got owned bitch!
That's it.... I'm gonna kill this whore.
What the fuck!? PMS gun?!
Die mother fucker!

 

by Gumby
2-23-02
Fear my wrath!
Holy shit, what the hell are you?!
*cry* I don't even know what I am anymore!
I'm sorry... there there it's alright.
30 minutes later...
And that's when the boys in class started teasing me.
I feel a real connection between us!

 

by Gumby
2-23-02
Don't you ever get tired of telling people to commit suicide?
No, not really.
Why don't you commit suicide, you overgrown piece of red trash?!
Because my life is of some importance, unlike you, you friendless grey robot without reproductive functions!
Jump already! It's not like you have any kids or a family!
You're right! My life is so meaningless!

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