All comics by Tom_D666

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by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Last time, our hero was in trouble!
I'm booking you for speeding.
.. Crap.. But, I don't even own a car! I mean, I'm just some guy in a comic. Being laughed at. Oh well, time for my stupid blurt out that makes everyone laugh.
So..
I WANT TO SEX YOU UP
Please don't sue me for this crappy comic. It was the best I could do :(
.... You're going down, now.
Don't worry, I'll do it for you.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
I can't believe I'm here. In jail. On my own. For a crime I didn't commit.
Aaaahh!!.. Who are you?
I'm the guy who completed Battletoads.
... You're kidding, right.
That's what THEY thought, then they threw me in here.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
So.. how do we get out of here?
We kill ourselves. You first.
Um.. are you sure? I hope you know what you're doing.
Trust me, it'll work.
... Yes.. This is working.. I will escape... I will escape from prison... but I'll die whilst doing it.... .. Life force.. fading.
Har har har. My evil plan is working!

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
It appears our hero is dead!
.. So.. Now what?
Welcome to Heaven!
Indeed. So, uh, what happens, around here?
Well, basically, all you do is sit around, worship me, worship God, and do other stuff. Like.. play E.T. for Atari 2600.
COULD HEAVEN ACTUALLY BE HELL?
E.T.??? AUGH. What happens if I kill myself here?
You can't. We don't have weapons. BUT WE DO HAVE.. uh.. something.. else.. yeah.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
I'm bored shitless! There's this booming voice that keeps on saying, "YOU DO NOT HAVE ENOUGH CREDITS TO DO THIS", what do I do?
Well, you have to go back to earth, and help someone.
Yeah, I'll do that.
Okay. CLOUDS.. OPEN UP!
.. That's a pretty big fall.
Don't worry, you'll survive.. You'll just be in.. lots of pain. That's right. Lots of pain.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Well. I survived the fall.. sort.. of.. what the hell has happened?
Oh, hey, yeah, we robots were responsible for this.
But.. why?
It was an accident! I swear!
and so jesus made everything better
OMG FIRE NOW WE'RE IN HELL
LET'S HAVE FIRESECHS

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Oh man.. Bench... I love you. Let's have man on wood sex. Seriously, it'll be great.
Just die already.
CLOSE UP THOUGHT VIEW
I have a chance with this bench.. All the others collapsed.
This guy's going down.
So.. do you like video games?
I absolutely despise them. I certainly like rape though. HOW WOULD YOU LIKE ME TO SHOVE THIS WOOD INTO YOUR ASS? I'm certain you'd enjoy it.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Marry me.
Note: This is planet Earth. I swear.
REMEMBER KIDS: DON'T MARRY COMPUTERS

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
My name.. is the EVIL OWL.. and I shall take over the world.
WITH ULTRA FANTASTIC SUPER ROBOTS!
This is a joke, right?
You will all be servants of EVIL OWL! MUWAHAHA!

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Don't you think it's weird how every stand up comedian sounds the same? I mean, am I right folks? Tell me. Yeah.
You suck! Get a life!
Yeah!
SCENE DELETED - so it's time for happy line dancing BUG FEST
Doo. Doo doo doo doo doo doo! Doo doo doo doo doo doo!
I had no part in this.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Huh, SexyGirl4312 wants to cyber and show my naked body on the webcam. We'll see about that!
He types this message.
"I will have to decline that for I am a normal human and you are a fat psycho LOL"
Damn. My Saturday night is over.
It's Tuesday, numbnuts.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
(Flashback to when goatse.cx was first uploaded)
Hey Butch, I'm just trying to find something.
Oh hey.. I have this horrible hango--
Shutupshutupshutup.. For a second.. I've found the motherload! FREE BRITNEY SPEARS PORN!
You shouldn't click on that, it'll probably take you to a virus site! *GASP* DON'T CLICK!
Too late.
What's that guy doing to his ass-- oh my god.. IT'S YOU!
.. Now that explains everything... Excuse me for a moment. I'm going to kill myself.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
i am like porno
omg lets have sexxx
ok roflforlofrlfrl
oooh cum
unf unf oh yes oh yes
give me more
And that's my comic.
You're Satan, aren't you?

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
!!! OH NO! A FIRE IN THE WHITE HOUSE!
QUICK! GET ME THE PRESIDENT!
Uh.. sir.. You are the president.
Right right... The country is screwed. We're screwed.. You're screwed... I'm screwed.
AAAUGHGHGHGHGHGHGH

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
It's time for robut comedik time! :D
Well, you see, I actually rather like tea.. It's a gentlemen's drink.
Oh, boo hoo, hey look, I'M CLANGO AND I CAN'T TAKE A GODDAMN JOKE. god, you make me sick.
But you didn't even say anything.
SHUT UP I HATE YOU ALL. Launch Nuclear Missile.
boom
So, like I was saying.
Goddammit, you're still alive. I hate life.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
www.livejournal.com/~sucker4christ is Sucker4Christ, if you're wondering.
Oh, hello, you know me. The guy from the first strip. Yup, me. Even though I'm actually from a site called exploding dog.
WHATEVER!
Will you marry me?
WHATEVER!
Jesus, you're an idiot.
WHATEVER! omg i have a limited vocabulary

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
www.livejournal.com/~gawthikpunk , btw.
No luck with Sucker4Christ, how about you, GawthikPunk?
omg wat LOL I AM A GAWTH
You don't look like one.
wat lol i dropped out of school bcuz i to smrt
My love life is terrible.
wat

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
.. Who's that?
I'm Gabe! I'm a fighter! I like to challenge WORTHY FIGHTERS!
You seem similar to Gabe from Penny Arcade.. Yet you act differently
YOU CAN TALK? YOU JUST MADE MY CROTCH HURT
tweet
Oh.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Uuuurghhh.. What a horrible night.
What am I doing on a spaceship? And who are you?
omg im pregnant thanks to you X( OMG WHO'S PILOTING THE SPACESHIP?
And so that weird planet was blown up

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Mama mia! I think I'm in love!
...
CLOSE UP THOUGHTS
This girl.. she's.. she's..
... I thought plmubers were gay.
OH, EMBRACE ME
Dude, plumbers don't say that.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Lucky 7 and Sucker4Christ!
omg rofl tom ur a hippie X(
whatever!
George Bush and The arm from Splatterhouse 2!
My fellow americans!
I was that arm from Splatterhouse 2. Yeah, I'm really popular.
SMOKEY and some girl.
I'M SMOKEY, smoke some cigarettes and it'll make you popular!
I don't play video games so I wouldn't know.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
So.. how's them eats?

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
OMG DOES ANYONE HAVE 50 PENCE?
.. No.
DID YOU JUST CALL ME A RETARD???//
.. No.
This loveable piece of crap was brought to you by MOTHER'S COOKIE AND CO.
ARE YOU ASKING FOR A CHALLENGE?????QUESTIONMARK?????///SLASH
.. No.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
You see, I have no heart, for I am a robot.
KHEE HEE HEE!
This winter holiday is the best idea ever, don't you agree?
KHEE HEE HEE!
You're my best friend.
You aren't mine, though. KHEE HEE HEE!

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Will I ever find true love?
My, you look handsome.. Wanna have rough anal?
OH YES PLEASE GOD YES!
Oh, hold on, I haven't got my contact lenses on.
Uh..
.. You're a robot? URGH, ANAL WITH A ROBOT, THAT'S JUST.. SICK.

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
I do have someone you could be with...
HEWWO! I HEAR ANAL SEX YOU WANT, YES? <3
Look, I'm.. I'm just not right for you. Okay?
You make indypete sad X(

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
Woe is me. No one in the world loves me. No one, NO ONE IN THE WHOLE WORLD!
I love you! <3
!!!! Really? This is the happiest day of my life! AUGH HEART ATTACK
No! You can't die! I LOVE YOU!
::Flump::
Life is horrible...

 

by Tom_D666
7-08-03
At the Church of Rocks.
We are gathered here to today.. HOLY CRAP! WHAT'S THAT IN THE SKY!?

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
So, you know squirrel? You're the greatest friend I've ever had. Ever.
Yeah, but you're not mine. I'm out of here.
But the squirell leaves! OH NO!
Come back Squirrel! COME BACK!!!
Oh, I dream of my death... over and over... and over.
God, NOT HIM AGAIN.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
At the drama theater
My mom left me when I was a child, she spanked me horribly, and left. I was only 4 weeks old!
HAW HAW HAW!
HAHAHNAAAGAA
*INSERT LAUGH TRACK*
Does anyone care for poor me?
... Nnnope.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
Has anyone wondered what the author looks like?
Yeah! We wanna know!
Our cool hip mooves will find him! START A SEARCH!
YES
OMG ROFL WHERE'S TEH PUNCHLINE X(
Hey there! I'm the author! *cough cough*
Forget it. Cancel the search.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
....
SHHH
Heya dude, how're y--
What could our evil hero be up to! FIND OUT!.. later!
This chessboard needs piece and quiet in order for my demonic chess board SUMMONING!

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
GASP! The chessboard is beginning to shake! Out comes...
A PRIEST?
...
I suppose this really is Satan.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
I WILL BECOME A BULLFIGHTER LIKE MY FATHER!
But didn't you know?
I AM YOUR FATHER
NOOOOOOOO!!

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
And then we found out..
It wasn't a fish!
HAHAHAHA
AWESOME!!
RADICAL! FUNNY!
... But, we just started with "And then we found out.."
Who writes our crap?

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
...
...
...
...
... Is anyone even watching this?
I love this show.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
OMG IT'S THE APOCALYPSE
OH NO
So what'd you think of that comic, asian girls?
Uh..
It kinda sucked.
It kinda sucked, eh? NOW YOU MUST PAY.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
That thing is the author, btw.
It has come to my attention that I must do one of these "oh no my comic is so crappy" things.
You see, it appears that most of these comics don't have a punchline.
So I think all the comics suck and should be banned from the internet. GOODBYE FOREVER
Haha, just joking, really, I actually like pie, and will continue making krappy comics until the apocalyp-- screw it. HERE'S TRICKY THE CLOWN OMG FROOFRL
BAREGHHH

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
Would you like to delete your painting? (YES) (NO)
You have selected (YES), have a nice day!
NOOOO!!!! Dammit Clippy, I clicked no! I CLICKED NO! URGH. God, I spent like, 5 days on that painting.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
So, what's this in my e-mail? "How to enlarge your penis." No thanks. God, I hate spam.
"How to enlarge your penis by 5 inchs." Jesus, what the hell?
OMG ENLARGE YOUR PENIS
I don't play video games so I wouldn't-- wait a minute. I don't even have a penis! HOW DARE YOU

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
An example of a bad comic
omg sukc my cokc
OKAYYYYYKAEa yum yum
Now we go BEHIND THE SCENES
You see, we never agreed to those comics. We were pasted into there by illegal people. They dubbed our voices with other stuff.
Seriously, we have no idea what we're talking about.
OMG TIME FOR ROCK
ROKC THE FACK OUT OF HERE!!!!!11
ROKC THE FECK OUT OF HERE!!111

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
Oh baby, oh yes, oh, naughty.
You like that, don't you?
YES, YES, OH GOD YES!
Hey, hold on, GET AWAY FROM THAT LIGHTSWITCH, BOB.
"What the hell."
Oh man..
Just because I pretend to be in porno doesn't mean I'm weird... I mean, we all have our fantasies.

 

by Tom_D666
7-09-03
These girls are fighting.
I'll kill you!
You're going down!
They're fighting japanese anime style.
HYAKMAISHI BLAST!
HURRICANU WAVE!
Don't complain on why they don't do anything. Use your imagination.
OW! BUT YOU DIDN'T COUNT ON MY TRAP CARD
DAMMIT

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
Don't sweat it, I've thought of an idea. TO THE BATMOBILE!
How could you, Osama? Now all these people, including us, are going to die!
AND SO THEY RAN TO THE BATCAVE
Well, looks like that plane IS doomed. The batmobile has been stolen.
Interesting. Wanna go home and watch porno?

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
Hey, Satan, do you like Death Metal?
Oh, sure, I like, Cannibal Corpse, Death, Six Feet Under, Nile. But I'm more into Black Metal. You?
Uh... Well, I like Christian Met--
Stop. Talking. Now.
Why?
Because I hate you now. You didn't have to say such cruel words.

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
I'm just a normal pink donkey.. Doo doo doo..
BOO!!
AAAIIEIEEE
.. I feel so alone.

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
This invisible picture is going on the wall.
No matter what, IT WILL GO ON THE WALL. must, raise, hammer, for, great, justis.
FUCK.. What's this goddamn pin doing on my head? I mean, seriously, why would I do something like that by accident? Jesus, why?
Jesus cannot answer your question at the moment. Please leave a message after the beep. Beep.

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
This is the lamest show evar.
And now on ITV, is WHO WANTS TO BE A MILLIONARE CLASSIC.
On Who Wants To Be A Millionare Classic, a little girl get's her go in this unaired show! It was the first show we made! Ever!
And, now, for £100, what--
Let's have sex.
I wasn't in this show. It was a dummy. I swear.
Alrighty then, I suppose that'll do for an answer HOLY CRAP GET AWAY FROM MY BROWN TROUSERS
Brown? Aren't you toilet trained? if not, then THAT TURNS ME ON

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
I don't like you.
I don't like you. Why don't you shut up.
Make me.
Make me make you make me make you AHA. Get out of that one.
Uh.. Yes?
Damn, you win.

 

by Tom_D666
7-10-03
Welp, 50th comic. And no one cares.
I do this in boredom and for fun.
Look at me! I'm a blue jellybean!
I like to eat pie.
Try reading from right to left! IT MIGHT MAKE SENSE. not.
CHOCOLATE PIE!
I need some pie.

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