All comics by rentedsandwich

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by rentedsandwich
7-22-04
So, in conclusion, if you don't give up marijuana right away, you'll end up looking like me. Thanks for listening.
...well?
Your shirt...is ****in...awesome.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-22-04
LOOOKIT MY SKELZ1

 

by rentedsandwich
7-22-04
Man, what the hell are you talking about?
Just believe me. Check it out.
Alright. I think you're full of it, but alright.
Aaaaaaaand...
Oh my God, I AM a eunuch!
...Free wallet.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-22-04
Something is vastly wrong in the Playhouse.
Hello.
Hey.
All these new people are weridos. What do we do?
No idea, man. No idea.
I only needed two frames for that one.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-22-04
Fuck fuckity fuck fuck fuck etc.
*gasp*
I was offended by your excessive use of curse words. My fragile young brain was utterly destroyed.
*tap tap tap click*
And furthermore...
C'mon, Billy. Time for your hot beef injection.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-25-04
Everyone is evil.
I'm bored. What should we do?
Idunno. Babyrape?
Some moreso than others.
Dear Earnesto, I'm leaving you for your aunt. Borrowed your car, hope you don't mind.
Sucks to be you, man.
And then there are the true badasses.
So, Mr. Roberts, you killed the chicken, your aunt and her girlfriend? Prepare for an eternity in THE PIT!!
Satan...shut up.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-26-04
BH meets ringjester.
I'm so awesome.
*click*
BH turns ringjester in to meat.
*killing noises*
*sex noises*

 

by rentedsandwich
7-26-04
BH meets plankton.
...!
I knew it!
This is a gooooood mirror.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-26-04
BH is insane.
I don't know, mirror plankton. If I kill everyone, who will I troll?
No, no, I'm giving up the mass murders. Time to straighten up and fly right.
plankton is more insane.
Kill while spouting LUEisms.
omgwtfbbq. BEST. IDEA. EVER.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-26-04
That's a nice cloud...
Oh, hey, BH.
What's...uh...
Go ahead, punk. Do a barrel roll.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-26-04
Uh...

 

by rentedsandwich
7-27-04
IT BEGINS!
I win.
No, I win.
IT CONTINUES!
Dude, I so win.
Look at me. I obviously win.
IT...KINDA TRAILS OFF INCONCLUSIVELY!
I have a white shirt, therefore I win.
I'm Civ, so the contest ends with me as the winner.

 

by rentedsandwich
7-29-04
SexyPappa46290: *plays with your--
SexyPappa46290? Hands up, you pedophile bas--wait, what the hell?
Never mind guys, it's just some gay kid!
Hey! I'm not gay!

 

by rentedsandwich
7-29-04
SexyPappa was angry, but Agent Stokes knew something the kid didn't...
Hahaha, yeah, okay kid. See you in five years.
What an asshole. Now to infuse this story with as much angst as possible and put it on the internet.
...that despite the worldwide reach, infinite complexity, and boundless usefulness of the Internet...
...there are, unfortunately, very few women.
SexyPappa, are you there? Sexy?

 

by rentedsandwich
8-01-04
Hey, Old Man! Wake up! *robokick*
Wha...huh? Ow!
Wake up, dammit!
Oh my God, a robot! Where...where am I??
...New Jersey.
NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

 

by rentedsandwich
8-01-04
Let's see...I took that weed nap in 1994. How long have I been asleep?
*robocalculates*...One year.
Oh...wait, why am I bald and white-haired, then?
No idea. Hairjacking?
That's weird...
You mean 1994 by the Unified Calendar of Rastafarianism, right?

 

by rentedsandwich
8-01-04
So I've been asleep for 3000 years, Jersey conquered the U.S., and all sentient robots have converted to Rastafarianism?
Ya mon.
What else has changed?
Language.
What do you mean? I understand your English completely.
I'm speaking Italian.

 

by rentedsandwich
8-02-04
Well, this really sucks, robot. I think I'm going to take out my wrath on you. Yeah, I like that idea! Prepare to die!
Realized that you're a 3000-year-old dwarf and I'm a giant killing machine yet?
Starting to, yeah...

 

by rentedsandwich
8-02-04
Wait, I read science fiction books! All I need to do is present you with a paradox! This statement is false!!
Psh. We've evolved far past the point of being confused by mere sentences.
So nothing can kill you?
Well, the password can...but it's kept so secret, not even robots know what it is. I doubt a primitive from another millenium could possibly discover it.
Dude--

 

by rentedsandwich
8-02-04
Whoa, Leo? What the hell happened to you?
Dwarf...blew me up...
There, good as new.
Thanks. By the way, the password is Du--

 

by rentedsandwich
8-02-04
Beep beep, I am a robot.
I know you're a robot. Put me back together.
Beep beep, I am--
I know, Mike! I know! Every fucking day for 300 fucking years you've told me you're a fucking robot, I get it! I'm not stupid! You're a robot, okay! Now shut up!
...Beep beep, I am a robot.
*bursts into flames*

 

by rentedsandwich
8-02-04
In the future, there are infinite backgrounds.
None with naked women, despite my threatening, explicit letters.

 

by rentedsandwich
8-03-04
SWEET CRISPY CHRIST! WHAT THE HELL IS THAT??
Excuse me? Ah, never mind, you must be a sleeper. I'm of the feet-ear people from the clam nebula.
We're, ah, we're working on figuring out how evolution arrived on this.
Not destroying the universe? 'Cause if I woke up looking like that, nobody would be safe.

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