All comics by stevpear

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by stevpear
9-02-02
What beautiful clouds! This is truly a wondrous place.
Hello, Mr. Chicken. Your feathers look esquisite!
And they thought I was a prime canidate for the mental ward... Sheesh.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Bud... what are you doing?
Hammering a nail into my head.
....
It's fun, Andre. Really.
Kay.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Bud ruminates...
Life is like a box of chocolates.
It's sticky, and sweet, and when you leave it out in the sun too long, it melts and gets all over the place.
And you get addicted to it, craving more and more of it, until there's no more of it, and you're a fat bloated piece of lard.
But still. You never know what you're gonna get.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Christmas is coming, but I know it's all fake. The fat man through a skinny chimney, the flying reindeer, the Ho-Ho-Ho. It's all one big lie.
But at least a couple months after "Christmas,"the Easter Bunny comes. He'll shower us good little children with candy, and plant great big chocolate eggs under every tree.
He's a wonderful one, that Easter Bunny!

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
"Alright, boys.. time to bring some order to this strip."
Fine!
Bring it on!
"You on the left, you're Bud. And you're in a trashcan. On the right, you're Carl."
A TRASHCAN! Oh, come on, boss.
But.. I was Andre..
"It helps tell you apart.. and Carl sounds better. ANY MORE QUESTIONS?"
Trashcan. Got it.
TAKE US BACK!! TAKE US BACK!!

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
"It is now time for you, creature, to be named."
You can't scare me with that crap, man. I'm a bunny with one ear. I've heard worse.
You tell 'im!
"I shall call you... Fuzzy."
Fuzzy? Yeah, right.
"There goes your insignificant friend. Any other bright ideas?"
Fuzzy it is.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
"It is your time to be named, pathetic hypocrite."
No.
"WHAT WAS THAT, PITIFUL WORM?"
I hate people who ramble on and on and on, *forever*. Why, they remind me of the time when...
*** several hours later ***
Behold, the power of hypocrisy!

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
A wise man once said: "If life gives you lemons, make lemonade."
I say: "If life gives you a hammer, pound nails into your head."

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Tell me something inspiring, Bud.
Let's see what I can do, pal.
My dad always told me about the First Golden Rule. It was, "Treat others like you want to be treated."
Wow.. but what was the Second Golden Rule?
"If someone's smaller than you, beat them up and take all their money." This overrode the first rule, by the way.
Oh.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Life... is torture.
*BSSSSTT*
Must change channel... yet arms, not nearly long enough.
*BZZZZSSZT*
Damn you, Creator. Your mind is a twisted one.
And now, back to the Richard Simmons Workout Marathon!

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Hi, Bud.
Hey, man.
*hic*
How's it going?
Pretty good, you?
"blasted human imperfections..."
Dare I ask what that was?
Hiccups. Drink a glass of water upside down, O Mighty Creator.

 

by stevpear
9-02-02
Boy, I would SURE HATE to be out of this trashcan, and surrounded with beautiful women right now. Man!
HE LISTENS!
"Nice try, Bucko."
May your soul go straight to Hell, O Creator.

 

by stevpear
9-05-02
Rock. Lampe.
Word of the day!
RESISTANCE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED.
Wise. Moyer.
If only I knew the answer..
Damn, I love history. And you should love it too!
Wilcox. O'C.
Back in my college days, we spoke Latin all day long. Wait.. that was six months ago...
We miss ya bud.

 

by stevpear
9-06-02
The thing I hate about life is that it doesn't change.
Everything just stays the same. No originality. No creativity. No freedom.
Deluded bastard.
I really hate it.
A wise man, he is.

 

by stevpear
9-08-02
Lampe describes the lab's chemical shower...
This is the chemical shower. If you pull the rope, I'll come running.
When I see you, you better be three things. Wet, in pain, and naked.
This rope has never been pulled. Let's not have a first time.

 

by stevpear
9-08-02
Attack of the evil packing list.
Bug spray (think mosquitoes)
Yes, mosquitoes ARE bugs, you bald-headed moron.
Water bottle (and a way to carry it yourself!)
You want me to bring a fanny pack? Eat shit.
Rain gear (waterproof jacket). We go, rain or shine!
GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME!

 

by stevpear
9-10-02
I am Honey.
I am Mexican Cum.
We are Chinese fighting fish.
We will fight for the amusement of many loving and adoring fans.
(Mexican Cum won.)
May the best fish win.
Agreed.

 

by stevpear
9-10-02
Madam, I'm Adam.
Madam, I'm Adam.
A Dan, a clan, a canal - Canada!
A Dan, a clan, a canal - Canada!
This isn't funny.
Ynnuf t'nsi siht.

 

by stevpear
9-10-02
I couldn't believe it at first. Getting kicked out of a public institution, for simply singing a song.
Imagine that-- singing a song! Don't we, as Americans, have freedom of speech?
Then I sat back, and thought about the situation.
Looking back, I guess the workers at the malaria ward didn't take kindly to me rocking out to "Down With The Sickness" so near the patients.

 

by stevpear
9-11-02
Moyer speaks with Dubya.
Alright, you blabbering idiot. I want control of Congress, and your pathetic office. History shall NOT be denied.
Alright, man.. Just save me Texas!
You, my metal friend, are the first Robotic Historian. Go forth and educate the masses. Hahahaha!
Declaration of Independence: 7/4/1776. Spanish Armada: 1588. Bob Moyer: Genius...
Elsewhere..
Bud, it seems that an insane historian has seized control of the world.
Oh, what the hell. It's Moyer.

 

by stevpear
9-11-02
.... so.. fucking.. creamy...
Why the bitching, friend?
I'm having Crawley orange juice withdrawal, you inconsiderate bastard.
Damnit, you brought back memories.. it's...
.... so.. fucking.. creamy.

 

by stevpear
9-15-02
I was tired of waiting.
And.. no. The answer is "ia", not "ea."
Jeff:
YEEEEEESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

 

by stevpear
9-15-02
Latin class...
And, can anyone give me an important fact about Catullus?
Well, just a wild guess.. isn't 84 BC an important date?
Watch.. 84 BC will turn out to be Catullus' birthday.
I don't know man.. we didn't study him at all last year.
Wow.. good guess Jeff. Catullus was born in 84 BC!
Jeff Beers is a fucking psychic.

 

by stevpear
9-16-02
A rocket ship: $100 billion
Schwing!
God's love and affection: $1 trillion
ANYBODY can be bought.
Wilcox's complete domination: Priceless.
And... no. The answer is "eius." Sorry.
Damn, he's good.

 

by stevpear
9-26-02
This comic has been halted due to lack of brainpower and absence of any free time whatsoever.
Courtesy Bob Moyer.
ugh

 

by stevpear
9-26-02
Dude, you totally got dominated.
that bastard

 

by stevpear
9-30-02
doctor's office.
and, no physical activity for a week.
THIS IS NOT A GOOD THING.

 

by stevpear
10-02-02
I am Matthew Antoine the token bitter cynical black man who is fed up with society's evils, and yet does nothing to improve his people's position in life
I am Paul, the typical white man who, even though he's living in a racist society, tries his best to "be nice to the cute little monkey"
I am Mrs. Henri Pichot
Pass the beer, bitch.

 

by stevpear
10-03-02
Hello, Mike!
you fucking asshole
how was concert choir
eat shit you pompous deluded bastard
this is where I walk away
why don't you go jump off a bridge.... PRICK

 

by stevpear
10-04-02
bob moyer
scrum-diddly-umptious

 

by stevpear
10-06-02
stan frickin' parker.
Who's got the diploma, dickhead? YOU, or ME?

 

by stevpear
10-06-02
bob and phil critique modern art
my, I just love the pseudo-surrealism of this television program
yes, the inner complexities and emotions of the lead characters are very deep
later on..
what WAS that steaming pile of shit?
I don't know, but I'm sure a few brews will make it better. come, a toast to Kitty..

 

by stevpear
10-06-02
popular Times columnist John Meathead writes his column on his trusty spell-check-enabled computer
mister Meathead doesn't have worry about stupid little things like spelling or grammar because his computer is fancy
was it I before E, except after F and G? oh, who gives a crap..
popular Times columnist John Meathead, without spellcheck
IRAK IS BAD. BY JON QUINCY MEATHED. "Sadam is a bade, bade mann.. and he shuld DY!" ....

 

by stevpear
10-07-02
out of the darkness...
it's the incredible, the amazing...
supernihilistman!
Shut the fuck up.

 

by stevpear
10-08-02
every day you get in a box. then, you take a ride in another box
you arrive in a big box. then you go to a smaller box, and do something that makes someone else happy
boxes fucking suck

 

by stevpear
10-08-02
apology courtesy wilcox
dudes.. that last comic was written by dieck.
he's supernihilistman.. you know, death and destruction, the end of the world as we know it.. all that crap
yeah, the joke's dead.
now that that's cleared up.. I need to get ready for my class of '96 highschool reunion. peace
and there goes wilcox... rocking the macron as always

 

by stevpear
10-15-02
ok I think I'll dominate you all by posting things up on blackboard at 4 am the day its due and by changing lab formats.. ciao
its the truth

 

by stevpear
10-17-02
ok let's assign pointless homework which will take a long time... he-he-he english is fun
but it doesn't matter since I get As

 

by stevpear
10-19-02
despite all his rage
supernihilistman's just a
rat in a cage.
go jump off a cliff you fascist monkey

 

by stevpear
10-29-02
but what about the girl?!?!?! the girl!!!!
way to interrupt me for the 40th time
the actual deed wasn't very funny but these quotes were- so there

 

by stevpear
3-17-03
before spring break
shoot me now.
it has come
fuck yes.

 

by stevpear
3-20-03
YOU made the Pledge.
Bitch.

 

by stevpear
7-06-03
The T-rex eyes his prey.
Hey, come on now. You are what you eat.
some time later..
*rimshot*
Chicken.

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