Broly  

"Dear Mr. Zanzibar, since tax rebates are given alphabetically, you may never receive yours." ~U.S. Gov

"Dear Mr. Alfonz, since tax rebates are given inverse alphabetically, you may never receive yours." ~U.S. Gov

Dear Mr. Pimp, since tax rebates are given... er, since your name is... ah fuck it, you're not getting jack from us." ~U.S. Gov