All comics by Broly

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by Broly
9-16-01
Where the hell am I?
I'm guessing a comic strip
Who the fuck are you?
The author. You're just a kid, shouldn't you not curse?
You're the Author, shouldnt you not... suck!
Oh, you're a piece of work.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
So... should I be doing something?
Sure, go ahead.
Am I the mack or what?!
Oh yeah, that's talent.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
The fuck are you doing!
Just testing the waters. Hahah, waters, get it?

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey! Hold it! This one is cool!
Ya think?
Oh yeah! It's ghetto fabulous!
...
What?
You get beat alot, don'cha?

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, think you could make me a co-star?
Sure, but it'll mean I can't talk to you any longer. They'll have my dialog box. Only through narration can I interact.
Boo hoo, what a loss.
Do you want a co-star or not?
Ok, lay it on me.
Damn, out of space, hold on...

 

by Broly
9-16-01
btw, I didn't phrase "make me a co-star" well last time, it should have been...
Can we just get on with it?
Alrighty, here you go.
WHAT IN GOD'S NAME IS THAT THING?!
Hey, you're no dish yourself.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
You no like?
How can I possibly like? It's a freakish cannibal with a huge gaping maw!
Hey now, I went to college.
What were you expecting?
A sassy black kid counter-part, a large-breasted redhead, anything but this!
You think I like being paired with you?
Ok, you're the author, can you just kill me or something?
I wonder how he'd taste with a nice hollandaise sauce...

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Another thing, I forgot to capitalize the title "ghetto...
Will you stop being so anal already!
Hey he's just trying to do his job.
Thank you... hey, what's your name?
Ooo, this is gonna be climatic.
...
...
I haven't the foggiest idea.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Damn, I don't know what to name him.
It's your bloody comic fercrissakes! Just name him!
I know. How about Alfonz the Cannibalistic Cannibal?
...
Well?
You must've sprung from one stupid gene pool.
I like it.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
So, like I said, are we supposed to do something?
You think I care?
What kind of pathetic Author are you?
My jaw's beginning to hurt.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, I bet you can't change direction like I can!
Godammit.
Hee hee.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Christ, I'm horny.
o_0
o_0
What?

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, Author?
Yes, m'boy?
Where do we go when we die?
The Playboy Mansion
That makes sense.
Now I'm even hornier.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, can I get a new shirt, this one's starting to smell.
Thanks.
I want new clothes!
You're naked, you dolt!
Why can't I have nice things? *sob*

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, kiddos. To those of you enjoying the comic, I thought it was about time for a Haiku. Billy and Alfonz will comply, since they're my puppets. *giggle*
'Oh, my backwards cap. And my ghetto fab outfit. How dizope I am.' Good, huh!
Wigger
Wigger.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
WHAT THE FUCK!
Just keeping you on your toes.
Darnit, I was having fun.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, Alfonz?
Yeeees?
Why are you in black & white?
Hmm, that's a good question...
Maybe I'm a Turner Classic Movie.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
You're looking at my crotch, aren't you?
How could you tell?

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Hey, Alfonz, exactly what the fuck is the deal with those teeth?
All the better to rend your flesh into digestible chunks with, my dear.
Wow, you sound pretty malicious.
Yep.
Luckily, I'm safe, due to the fact that you can't move.
...shit.

 

by Broly
9-16-01
Enough about me, what's your story, Vanilla Ice?
I be from the ghetto, representin' Detroit, in the hizouse!
Word.
At least you're no worse than Eminem.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hi again, loyal readers. 'Tis me again. I've come up with a new idea to innovate the comic and mix things up. Billy has been the primary dialogue character...
Alfonz, on the other hand, has played off his words in a secondary role. Due to their respective locations. I will change this now and then by...
Switching their locations!!! Genius, no?
Now that's innovation.
Fo' sho'.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Good news! This comic has been recognized by a popular comic, and I will promptly be offered a lucrative contract!
Author's having pathetic dreams of fame and fortune again, isn't he?
... and they'll shower me with gold, and give me a million fancy European cars, and beautiful women will service me constantly...
Looks like it.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Wasssuuuup!
Wassuuuup!
Watchin' the game, havin' a Bud.
True, true.
C'mon guys, do we really need to sink to this level?
If we're going down, we're taking you with us.
Less talk, more wassup!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Some of you may notice that I'm creating comic strips at a rapid pace. I assure you, even if I create many strips daily, I will strive for the utmost in quality humour.
If by humour you mean a big steaming pile of pointless shit.
Hey, be nice!
Hahahaha, you said "of".

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey, did you hear about your mom?
No, what?
She's fat!
...
Oh, wow, I doubt that my ribcage could possibly absorb the pounding reverberations eminating from my laughter due to such a funny joke.
Hahaha, whoosh!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Oops, I *bleep*ed it again.
I *bleep*ed with your *bleep*.
"Uncensored Britney Spears lyrics."
Got *bleep*ed in the game. Oo baby, ba*bleep*...
I never figured that innocent girl the vulgar type.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey, y'know what I got a hankerin' for?
A big, fat penis?
...
Actually, I was thinking more along the lines of nachos.
That was my next guess.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey, Alfonz, I was gonna go watch some WNBA Basketball! Wanna join me?
How could I refuse!
*pff*
*pff*
OMG, that was a good one!
Hahaha, it's funny 'cuz they suck!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hello again, my unclothed minions. We here at...
Hey, what's the name of the comic again?
Oh wait, I'm the Author, I can make the name.
I worry about that boy.
When are we getting paid?

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hold on just a minute, don't start the comic yet, I need to take a piss.
Aaaah, that's better...
Uh, I think this edition is over, Al.
Oh well. At least I got to write my name on that unconscious hobo.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
So, may I finally decree a name for the comic? Or do either of you need to relieve yourselves further?
I'm good.
I think I need to go again. #2 this time.
Shut up. How does this grab you... Broly's Boulevard!
What kind of stupid ass name is that?
I like it, but I also like boy bands, so my opinion isn't worth diddly squat.
Wow, you guys aren't very helpful.
May I poop now?

 

by Broly
9-17-01
DUDE, HOLY SHIT!
Ow, ow, get it off!
What should I do, what should I do!
Call the police or something, OOOOW!
"Upcoming Fox Special: When Midgets Crave Flesh"
Ewww, your ankles... I'm gonna be sick.
I'll never tapdance again! *sob*

 

by Broly
9-17-01
1337
ha
j0o
su
"1337 Speak Word Association"
fa
g0t

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey Author, I think you made a mistake last edition.
Yes, it's quality dropped from crappy to some adjective pertaining to advanced crappiness
Uh, yes. Apparently the strip didn't like upper shifted keystrokes somewheres...
Wanna get some pie?
I was just about to ask you the same thing!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
... I mean, is she the biggest slut or what?
I concur.
I mean, when she put that thing in her...
Yeah! I still have photos from that night.
Boy, we we're drunk. But she was...
Woo! Don't get me started!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey kids, we here at Broly's Boulevard want to have a serious discussion with you about drugs.
As serious as my overly dilated pupils.
Drugs are bad. Really bad. They'll mess up your life, your way of thinking, and only cause harm and long-term problems which far outweigh the short term high.
Ditto.
Phew, that was a tough speech to make. Time to kick back with some drugs.
Not before I'm done with 'em, bitch.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Ever have the feeling you're being watched...
Yeah, by me. And with any luck, people kind enough to read this comic strip and put up with your bullshit.
Oh yeah.
We're in a comic strip?

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Well folks, I've decided our characters should go on an adventure. Break up the monotony. They can't survive off wit alone.
That makes sense.
What is this "wit" you speak of? Is it edible?
*BOOOOOM*
Hey, explosion. Bitching.
Ow, my tender eardrums!
Waitaminute... I think we were jipped.
I demand a slice of wit!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Haha, alright, seriously. Time for adventure!
Psst, guys, adventure it up, if you don't mind.
Uh, wow. Outer Space sure is... exciting. Wouldn't you say, Alfonz?
Outer Space sucks. Now I can't shop at the GAP.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hi again, everyone! We reconstructed Billy and Alfonz good as new!
Wow, that was fast.
A bit too fast, if you ask me.
Well, we had to hurry you back due to... underwhelming results from your replacement.
Speaking of which, weren't you gonna have some stand-up guy do the strip?
Yeah, whatever happened to the pasty-faced goon?
The crowd pelted him with daggers.
Ouch.
Them's the breaks.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey, why do I have such a stereotypical name?
Stereotypical, howso?
Billy is a name for little kids, I deserve something with more zing, more pizzazz.
How about "Dumbass"?
Billy's cool.
I like "Dumbass".

 

by Broly
9-17-01
'Foolish little boy. I will bite your head clean off. Then, devour you whole.'
'Ho ho, I think not! I bust a cap in yo' ass! Try to stop that, punk.'
'I will use magic. My shaman powers will win. Ha, you stand no chance!'
'I will get my car. Call up homies for drive-by. Shoot you straight to hell.'
Haiku battles are fun.
Yes.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey, kiddies! Today we're going to have a little fun with props! I'm going to set Billy on fire... let's watch the fun!
Wait, can we talk about this?
This'll be good.
OW, CHRIST, IT BURNS!!!!!
Ooo, pretty.
Ow...
The funny part was when you were in horrible, gut-wrenching pain.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
While we repair Billy's scorched body, we have a special guest for today. A bearded goat thingy! Get along you two scamps.
Hmm, goat, I wonder how it tastes...
GET IN MAH BELLY!!!
*bah?*
You just had to eat today's special guest, didn't you?
He was asking for it.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hooray, Billy's back!
Better not set me on fire again, beeyotch!
Be grateful, I used up my whole stash of scotch tape to fix you.
Wow, ALL your scotch tape?
Yes, ALL of it.
Heh, scotch tape, you suck.
Now I regret it.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
[Canada joke]
[Abe Vigoda joke]
[France joke]
[Ray Lewis joke]
What? I'm entitled to be lazy.
[J. Lo's Ass joke]
[Dirty Abe Vigoda joke]

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey Katie, if you're reading this, Author wants to apologize.
Yes, he feels bad for the mistake he made, and he likes you alot and only wants the best for you.
Psst, you better accept his apology, he's been crying all day.
We're knee-deep in his tears.
*sob* Just do the apology!
Pansy.
Nancy boy.

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Where is this strip supposed to be set anyways?
I think it's Iowa.
Iowa? How stupid are you! This is a brick wall with a concrete ground, it's an urban setting! There's no way this is Iowa!
No, he's right. It's Iowa.
Dammit.
Woohoo!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Is that even your face?
Of course not, it's a mask.
Can I see what's under it?
Certainly...
WHEN POT-BELLIED PIGS FLY OUT OF MY ASS!

 

by Broly
9-17-01
Hey Billy, who's that behind you?
Hi, guy.
Oh, that's just Satan.
Yeah, that's what I thought.

Showing page 1.

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