Hello. I'm Cthulhu, and this is my wednesday bridge partner, Satan.
Nice to meet you.
Just in case you were thinking that drinking Smirnoff Ice or Bacardi Silver will cause nymphomaniacs to fall from the sky or allow you to transform an otherwise dull location into a party...
Isn't going to happen. They're all just malt liquor. Not even skank-ass malt liquor like Haeffenreffer, either. We're talking Zima in drag.
And Zima's really just the fluid that weeps from the nipples on Satan's back.
It's true. I leak Zima. You'd be better off trying to get a contact high by licking Billy Dee Williams.
