Oh, that I may [oompf!] know not the pain of my 'nards being tightly squeezed...
...nor kicked by a big clown, nor broom-handled by an old hag, nor objects of great mass, a.k.a. coconuts, dropped on them, nor cornholed by a big, red robot named, "TOBOR"...
...what a joyous [OUCH!] life that would truly be!
