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Screwball
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I'm either unfunny or uncool. Either works.
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Talking Beds? I swear I don't smoke 420.
by
Screwball
6-08-08
That's my bed over there.
Even my bed makes fun of me not getting laid
Yesterday I swore I heard it laughing at me when I came home alone. Again.
Why couldn't I have been Paris Hilton's bed instead of this loser's? Captain Dickless here gets less ass than Karl Rove.
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Screwball's Comics
02/23/09 - Moving day.
02/23/09 - 20 dolla, mista!
02/23/09 - Those are not the bright lights of a disco ball, right?
02/23/09 - Sadly, Z was nowhere in sight.
02/22/09 - Cast 2
02/22/09 - Cast 1
02/22/09 - So, what's wrong here?
02/22/09 - And he's sacked.
02/22/09 - Unfortunately, I was proven right.
02/22/09 - I am not a hypocrite. Right?
02/22/09 - There's a train leaving at 5AM, be under it.
02/22/09 - I attract bad luck, part one.
02/15/09 - The hell that awaits those of us who intend to date one day.
02/15/09 - Can we keep these to a minimum?
02/15/09 - Loveline won't be right back...
02/15/09 - You miss good stuff when you don't listen.
02/15/09 - You're either emo or gay. And you aren't wearing any makeup.
02/15/09 - A brother's love, right?
02/10/09 - Actually, I probably do hate him.
02/10/09 - Haven't I gotten past this yet?
02/10/09 - There are no bodies in my backyard. I think.
02/10/09 - Why me?
02/10/09 - He hate me.
02/03/09 - A disgrace, I tell ya!
02/03/09 - These are the kind of jokes I think of.
02/03/09 - The 7 minute theory, Conclusion.
02/03/09 - The 7 Minute Theory, part 7.
02/03/09 - The 7 Minute Theory, part 6
02/03/09 - The 7 minute theory, part 5.
02/03/09 - The 7 Minute Theory, part 4
02/03/09 - The 7 minute theory, part 3.
02/03/09 - The 7 minute theory, part 2.
02/03/09 - The 7 minute theory, part 1.
02/03/09 - No one ever laughs when I say this.
02/03/09 - Fell back down.
01/20/09 - Reverse Twist of the Knife.
01/20/09 - OATB, but without the 5-0's
01/20/09 - My favorite subjects...
01/15/09 - Options?
01/15/09 - Welcome to Starr Slurp!
01/15/09 - Slurp?
01/15/09 - School dayz.
01/15/09 - Well, I AM in my third day of college...
01/15/09 - But DID someone tell you?
01/15/09 - Numbers change reality. Right?
01/15/09 - OATB 6
01/15/09 - Uh, IS this all I ever think about?
07/16/08 - Come on, you knew it!
07/16/08 - Stoning the Stoner
07/16/08 - Real American Bottoms.
07/16/08 - Not subtle. Possibly indecent.
07/16/08 - Thrown Copper (as in, Pennies)
07/16/08 - Uh, uh huh.
07/12/08 - Obsession isn't just a perfume.
07/12/08 - Breaking it down
07/12/08 - A dick joke.
06/24/08 - This has been Loveline...
06/24/08 - Like he didn't see this coming.
06/24/08 - I can't win.
06/24/08 - Don't be a weird boy! (like me, Exile?)
06/24/08 - Topic idea received.
06/24/08 - Information Age.
06/24/08 - Obligatory GameFaqs tie-in
06/24/08 - I believe this is called "Screwed"
06/24/08 - Mary Worth? Apt.3G?
06/24/08 - Exaggerations?
06/24/08 - JB
06/24/08 - Anger, Denial...WHAT?
06/24/08 - Are we beginning to become repetitive? Nah!
06/24/08 - He never said he didn't...
06/08/08 - OATB 5
06/08/08 - Editor's note.
06/08/08 - You ruin everything, jerk!
06/08/08 - They're better than we are, aren't they?
06/08/08 - I'm not unattractive!
06/08/08 - Talking Beds? I swear I don't smoke 420.
06/08/08 - No help, as always
06/08/08 - Jealous.
05/31/08 - If you know me, this is funny.
05/31/08 - Yeah, how?
05/31/08 - I stand 2
05/31/08 - I stand 1
05/08/08 - Four less years!
03/07/08 - I am (Very) Gay! Roars Larry Craig!
03/07/08 - I'd like to avoid this, if at all possible
03/07/08 - He's back.
03/07/08 - Donnawonna, huh?
03/07/08 - untitled
03/07/08 - Pre-out at the bars.
03/07/08 - I guess.
03/07/08 - Warp speed, Mr.Sulu!
02/13/08 - You can try suing me too!
02/13/08 - out at the bars 4
02/13/08 - Evil never dies. Nor do bad movies or bad actresses.
02/13/08 - Out at the bars, part 3
02/13/08 - out at the bars, part 2.
02/13/08 - Out at the bars, part 1.
02/13/08 - Ridiculous things we do to save money, part 2
02/13/08 - We do ridiculous things to save money.
02/13/08 - Stop me before I vote again!
02/13/08 - This is what happens to MY brain.
02/13/08 - This is a real conversation.
01/01/08 - We're not too far from things like this.
10/10/06 - Never give blowjobs in the dark
10/10/06 - Justin.
10/10/06 - And yet, I don't shut up.
10/10/06 - At least it wasn't Rob Halford.
09/21/06 - I ain't the Viper!
09/21/06 - More of that humor Tom Barnard didn't see coming.
09/21/06 - My ego...1
09/07/06 - I've never seen anyone do this drunk. Except me.
09/07/06 - Imagine the submission scream from No Mercy...
09/07/06 - Thanks, AccentuateNegative!
08/31/06 - E=FU2
08/31/06 - No flamers were hurt in the making of this comic...
08/31/06 - Sometimes I take this too seriously.
08/01/06 - Gah! I didn't say this, did I?
08/01/06 - Hey, drugs!
07/31/06 - Don't encourage him.
07/31/06 - Rejected Mastercard Messages, part 4
07/31/06 - Rejected Mastercard Messages, part 3
07/31/06 - Rejected Mastercard Messages, part 2
07/31/06 - Rejected Mastercard Messages, pt.1.
07/31/06 - Jokes.
07/30/06 - I was gonna...
07/30/06 - Inventions of a lesser mind.
07/30/06 - How many of these did Babe Ruth hit?
07/30/06 - Republican Man: Sound those trumpets!
07/30/06 - Politics as usual.
07/30/06 - 100...of what?
07/30/06 - Captain Ahab lives!
07/30/06 - Of blanking course.
07/30/06 - How bout it?
07/30/06 - Josh comes back.
07/26/06 - Guess who's coming to dinner??
07/26/06 - I pushed it too far.
07/26/06 - For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge.
07/25/06 - Guys will do anything IF...
07/25/06 - Zippy!
07/25/06 - Thanks, Sean Penn!
07/24/06 - Luca Brasi sleeps with the Ramen.
07/24/06 - Dictator-ick
07/24/06 - Dictator-ish.
07/24/06 - Up and Down.
07/24/06 - The PHB is close by.
07/24/06 - Absurdities.
07/24/06 - Seeing too much of each other?
07/24/06 - Ah bin dweenkin, and dweenkin, and dweenkin...
07/24/06 - Como! (COMO)
07/24/06 - 41 years old. Wants to play next year. Who needs him?
07/24/06 - Maybe there's something to be said for spinelessness...
07/24/06 - Do I look like fucking Al Jarreau?
07/24/06 - A New World Ohrder
07/24/06 - Jesse never said this, and for that I love him.
07/24/06 - Julio
07/24/06 - Love/Loathe.Feelings about Jesse Martinez.
07/24/06 - Jesse and I, part 2.
07/24/06 - Jesse and I, part 1.
07/24/06 - Laylani
07/24/06 - Snake
07/24/06 - Justin.
07/24/06 - Well, what can I say?
07/24/06 - I'm probably going to be killed by Roger Waters.
07/24/06 - I don't think this is what they meant.
07/24/06 - The return of...who, again?
02/19/05 - Futuristic?
02/14/05 - Why Snake ignores my suggestions.
02/14/05 - Allen's folly
02/14/05 - Laylani...
02/11/05 - Josh8
02/11/05 - It Starts, part 2.
02/11/05 - It Starts.
02/11/05 - Allen
02/04/05 - Think about it 2
01/27/05 - Slapnuts part 2
01/27/05 - Slapnuts, part 1
01/27/05 - Things 2
01/27/05 - Jesse, you're a prick!
01/27/05 - A little fun
01/27/05 - This is what I wake up to.
01/16/05 - Imagine That.
01/16/05 - Porn?
01/16/05 - Untitled.
01/13/05 - Scorn VI
01/09/05 - Scorn V
01/09/05 - Scorn IV
01/09/05 - Scorn III
01/09/05 - Scorn II
01/09/05 - Scorn I
01/09/05 - Think about it.
12/29/04 - Twan cares.
12/29/04 - Josh7
12/29/04 - Convos with Jeff
12/29/04 - I Am The Walrus, Koo Koo Ga Joob!
12/29/04 - Bad Things, part X
12/29/04 - Josh's attempt to woo Donna Marie
12/29/04 - Yet another reason women rule the world.
12/29/04 - Excuses, excuses
12/29/04 - Yep.
12/29/04 - Logic. Missing. Here.
12/26/04 - The War is ON 5
12/26/04 - The War is ON! 4
12/26/04 - The War is ON! 3
12/26/04 - The War is ON! 2
12/26/04 - The War is ON!
12/26/04 - INCENTIVE!
12/26/04 - Mop's in charge.
12/26/04 - Mop's here.
12/26/04 - Second Date.
12/26/04 - Stupidity always wins, part 2
12/26/04 - What Jesse doesn't know, he can guess
12/26/04 - Just because it's 2004...
12/26/04 - Roiding Up
12/26/04 - Deep Questions, part 2
12/26/04 - Deep questions, part 1
12/26/04 - No, we're NOT Michael and Brian.
12/26/04 - Inside Joke
12/21/04 - This is how it is.
12/21/04 - Cheap shots.
12/21/04 - Other things.
12/21/04 - Quiet.
12/19/04 - Stupidity always wins.
12/17/04 - A connection between the election and TV, part 1
12/17/04 - Untitled
12/13/04 - Untitled
12/13/04 - No Fair!
12/12/04 - Reflections by CCMike
12/12/04 - Untitled
12/11/04 - Untitled
12/09/04 - Untitled
12/03/04 - Untitled
12/03/04 - Untitled
12/03/04 - Revelations Redux
12/02/04 - Things
12/02/04 - Untitled
12/02/04 - At Bars, part 3
12/02/04 - At Bars, part 3
12/02/04 - At Bars, part 2
12/02/04 - Laylani...
12/02/04 - Mike's adventures
12/01/04 - Untitled
12/01/04 - At Bars, part.1
11/28/04 - Untitled
11/28/04 - This just gets weirder...
11/28/04 - The Realm of the Ridiculous.
11/28/04 - Untitled
11/28/04 - The return of Republican Man
11/27/04 - Elimifake 4
11/27/04 - Elimifake part 3
11/27/04 - Elimifake, part 2.
11/27/04 - Eliminfake.
11/27/04 - Yet another chapter in Bad Things
11/27/04 - Twan and Sarah
11/27/04 - Reflections V
11/26/04 - Daniela 3
11/26/04 - Untitled
11/26/04 - Reflections 5
11/25/04 - Now he starts to get it
11/25/04 - Motivations part 5
11/25/04 - Motivations part 4
11/25/04 - Newt is an idiot...but we knew that already.
11/25/04 - Daniela part 2
11/25/04 - Dawny's White House.
11/25/04 - Devastation
11/25/04 - This wasn't going well...
11/25/04 - Motivations: III
11/25/04 - Motivations, part 4
11/25/04 - Motivations, part 2
11/25/04 - Snake and I discuss the motivations, part 1
11/25/04 - Bi people and straight people speak different languages.
11/25/04 - Untitled
11/25/04 - Untitled
11/25/04 - Reflections IV
11/25/04 - Reflections part III
11/24/04 - Untitled
11/23/04 - Josh and Matt
11/23/04 - Josh tries to recover
11/23/04 - In-joke
11/22/04 - Fucking Libras, part 2
11/22/04 - Talking with Jesse. Always a bad move. Fucking Libras.
11/22/04 - Reflections:Part 2
11/22/04 - Lexi's decision
11/22/04 - So will Lexi give up her soul?
11/22/04 - Jazi and Luke begin
11/22/04 - Reflections, part 1.
11/22/04 - Why people never ask advice from Jeff
11/22/04 - Craig makes his pitch.
11/22/04 - Craig appeals to Lexi.
11/22/04 - Untitled
11/22/04 - Snake and I compare things.
11/22/04 - Untitled
11/22/04 - Josh and Sarah's date, part 1
11/22/04 - Thoughts from my sick little mind
11/18/04 - Twan's face-breaker
11/18/04 - Why I don't whine to Laylani
11/18/04 - Craig.
11/18/04 - This is actually how I am.
11/15/04 - Newt and America's future.
11/15/04 - Sometimes even I think I should shut up.
11/15/04 - Slash
11/15/04 - Untitled
11/14/04 - Newt talks to America's future, part 3
11/13/04 - Newt talks to America's future, part 2
11/13/04 - Newt talks to America's future.
11/12/04 - Lexi and Neal...somewhere.
11/12/04 - Untitled
11/12/04 - And then...blackness
11/12/04 - And then...blackness
11/12/04 - Josh at @mosphere
11/12/04 - I think something bad happened...
11/11/04 - Josh6
11/11/04 - Twan hires Josh's bodyguard.
11/11/04 - Josh, Josh, Josh...
11/11/04 - Josh gets the gate.
11/11/04 - Why I don't date anyone in the strip
11/11/04 - Untitled
11/11/04 - What Newt needs.
11/11/04 - Dawny and Jeff
11/10/04 - Craig explains it to Neal
11/10/04 - Neal fucks up.
11/10/04 - Neal and I, fighting over Lexi...
11/10/04 - Neal and I begin flapping our gums, part 3
11/10/04 - Neal and I begin flapping our gums, part 2
11/10/04 - Neal and I begin flapping our gums, part 1
11/10/04 - Slowly I turned...crazy.
11/10/04 - Things that drive me insane.
11/10/04 - Josh3
11/10/04 - Josh2
11/10/04 - Josh.
11/10/04 - Dawny's white house, part 1
11/10/04 - And now, Dawny's Secretary of Defense
11/10/04 - Dawny's new Secretary of State
11/10/04 - I guess Newt is a bit...dumb
11/10/04 - Has Neal really changed?
11/09/04 - Dawny tries to get used to life with Newt, part 2
11/09/04 - Untitled
11/09/04 - Dawny tries to get used to life with Newt.
11/09/04 - Talking to Luke, part 2
11/09/04 - Talking to Luke
11/09/04 - Jokes granddad told you.
11/09/04 - This is why I don't give advice.
11/09/04 - Men and Women talk two different languages.
11/09/04 - Tim and Mike, part 1.
11/09/04 - Tim arrives in Tulsa, pt.1
11/09/04 - Why Mike hates when people visit Oklahoma, part 2
11/09/04 - Why Mike hates it when people visit Oklahoma, part 1
11/09/04 - Talking to Laylani
11/09/04 - Deep Thoughts
11/09/04 - Getting advice from Nichol.
11/09/04 - Lexi wonders about Neal, part 2.
11/09/04 - Lexi wonders about Neal...part 1
11/09/04 - This is NOT why I have straight friends
11/09/04 - And that ends that
11/09/04 - Mike and Sarah....Even I''m not sure what's going on here
11/08/04 - Mike and Sarah...
11/08/04 - Is it close for Mike??
11/08/04 - CC Mike again
11/08/04 - Neal and Lexi, sitting in a tree (3)
11/08/04 - Neal and Lexi, sitting in a tree (2)
11/08/04 - Luke and Jazi, part two
11/08/04 - I need to get laid, part 2
11/08/04 - I need to get laid, part.1
11/08/04 - Neal and Lexi, sitting in a tree
11/08/04 - Dawny's mistake, part 4
11/08/04 - Dawny's mistake, part 3
11/08/04 - Dawny's mistake, part 2
11/08/04 - Dawny's mistake
11/08/04 - Intro...Dawny
11/08/04 - Mike's delirious
11/08/04 - And we wonder why Mike doesn't get laid...
11/08/04 - Mike's living in the wrong time
11/08/04 - CC Mike spouts off.
11/08/04 - CC Mike...himself
11/08/04 - The intro of CC Mike
11/08/04 - Discussions with Matt
11/08/04 - Things always come back to haunt you
11/08/04 - More times when having straight friends is not a good thing
11/08/04 - So this is Josh.
11/08/04 - Luke's revelation!
11/08/04 - Luke finds something good.
11/08/04 - Untitled
11/08/04 - Untitled
11/08/04 - Untitled
11/08/04 - The Grim...something.
11/08/04 - Untitled
11/08/04 - Bad Things, part 1
11/08/04 - Laylani's dilemna
11/08/04 - Introducing Josh
11/08/04 - Strange Stuff, LTD
11/07/04 - Untitled
11/07/04 - Matt finishes what he started
11/07/04 - Now Sarah's unhinged.
11/07/04 - Matt going crazy
11/07/04 - Republican Man leaves...for now.
11/07/04 - RM: Unlimited
11/07/04 - Fear Republican Man
11/07/04 - Republican Man...shades of Nixon
11/07/04 - Republican Man sounds off, part 2.
11/07/04 - Republican Man sounds off.
11/07/04 - More strange stuff...
11/07/04 - See what they've done to me?
11/07/04 - Lexi and Neal's second meeting
11/07/04 - Craig
11/07/04 - The fallout, part 2
11/07/04 - The fallout from Matt and Sarah.
11/07/04 - Talking with Neal
11/07/04 - Nichol's Chat Parties...Intro of Neal
11/07/04 - Nichol's chat parties, part4 4
11/07/04 - Nichol's chat parties
11/07/04 - Nichol's Chat parties, part.3
11/07/04 - Nichol's chat party, part 2.
11/07/04 - Strange times at Nichol's chat parties
11/07/04 - Talking to Tasha.
11/07/04 - Talking to Jeff
11/07/04 - Talking to Mike.
11/07/04 - A little ditty Twan thought up...
11/06/04 - The night Twan admitted it.
11/06/04 - Crashing to Earth.pt.2
11/06/04 - Crashing to earth.
11/06/04 - The plot thickens
11/06/04 - Snake gets another shot
11/06/04 - Laylani and I...discuss things
11/06/04 - Snake finally forgives me...or did he?
11/06/04 - Matt gets Whopped.
11/06/04 - Matt and Sarah's date, part 2
11/06/04 - Matt's recap of his date with Sarah, part.1
11/06/04 - Luke and Jeff, part 3
11/06/04 - Untitled
11/06/04 - Luke and Jeff, Part 1
11/06/04 - Snake and Lexi...part 2.
11/06/04 - Snake and Lexi...
11/06/04 - Intro-Nichol
11/06/04 - Jeff loses
11/06/04 - Matt can't be stopped
11/06/04 - XXX
11/06/04 - Your Friends Are Coming to kill you
11/06/04 - Nights in Hell
11/06/04 - Straight Friends can sometimes be the worst
11/06/04 - I AM MINUTE MAN!!!
11/06/04 - The intro of my other running buddy
11/06/04 - Ready to explode.
11/06/04 - Best friends know all
11/06/04 - How I'm glad I'm not Jesse
11/06/04 - Jesse, Jesse, Jesse
11/06/04 - Times when Jeff should probably stay sober
11/06/04 - Let's not, shall we?
11/06/04 - Matt's version of romance
11/06/04 - Americanized idiots
11/06/04 - Welcome to my life, aka Life by Matt Groening.
11/06/04 - Walking Through My Friendslist, part 3
11/06/04 - Walking through my friends list, part.2
11/06/04 - Walking through my friendslist, part 1
11/06/04 - Laylani
11/06/04 - Hanging out with Matt is usually like this...
11/06/04 - Matt
11/06/04 - The only two who scare me.
11/06/04 - Me, Pt.2
11/06/04 - Me.part 1
11/06/04 - Jesse
11/06/04 - Why your friends hate you
11/06/04 - Why TV is never what it seems.
11/06/04 - 1
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