Scyess  
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Based on an idea I got from andydougan I'd like to post a Dramatis Personae. But since I don't know those words I'm just going to introduce the

Cast

Jon -- idiot savant occasional super hero and main character. He longs for romance while women long for him to go away. Terribly original I know.
Jim -- cowboy and pervert Jim enjoys abusing those weaker than himself. He has a soft spot for pedophilia.
Tataki -- Jon's main love interest. She's cute violent and totally uninterested in sex or romance.
Cowdjinn -- Jon's best friend a pink cow who lives chained in his closet.
Samantha -- demonic sub-creature and the only female friend Jon has.
Earl -- a spiritual pilgrim Earl wanders the earth looking for truth.
Sanna -- Jon's other roommate & the only normal person around
etc. -- damn; out of space

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by Scyess
3-24-01
Attention shoppers: iceberg lettuce is on sale on isle 12.
Iceberg lettuce, eh? What a boring food. Actually, it's not just boring, it's pointless. It's used as often as a disposable garnish as it is for actual food.
It is odorless, flavorless, worthless. It has no nutritional value. In fact, it has no value what-so-ever. The world wouldn't even care if it were done away with completely.
Hi, I'm home. Today at the store I discovered several similarites between myself and iceberg lettuce.
I swear I would move out of here in a second if I weren't chained to the closet...
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