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| For those of you who don't know me, I'm Twan. I'm the main character, and I live with three buffoons | |
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| I'm Josh, I'm Twan's roommate and running buddy, and I'm sexually confused | |
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| I'm Allen, and I'm an odd duck. | |
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| I'm JB, I'm a southern boy, and I'm real good with the ladies. | |
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| I'm Tasha, the cute blonde girl. | |
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| I'm Snake. I hate all these stupid lifeless motherfuckers. | |
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