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"If I ever saw an amputee getting hanged, I'd probably just start calling out letters." - Demetri Martin

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I think I figured out why they put pearls in tampons. It's because clams make pearls and vaginas are sometimes referred to as clams!
Oysters make pearls. Not clams. Your theory sucks.
Well if you ever want to get inside my clam ever again, you'll not argue with my theories.
You know, I was planning on getting you some pearl earrings made by clams for your birthday.
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