Sir, I'm detective Sipowicz. Bystanders say you witnessed the entire event. Can you tell me exactly what happened?
Why shore, boy! That feller with the big mouth was whupping this feller dressed in black on the head with a bat. Then that donkey yonder started in on him.
Um...
I guess that's when them aliens and the feller on the cross set that van on fire. And them little Chinese girls was trashin the liquor store with them two robots.
