Smeagol swam deep in the river, but moments before he laid eyes on the golden glint of the One Ring, something else caught his attention.
It is preciousss, it is oil! Smeagol rich beond his wildest dreamses.
But dark days lay ahead. OPEC was under attack and unable to reach consensus. Smeagol remained underground in the blackness of an oil well, and changed his name to Gollum.
Nasty Clintonses hurts usssss preciousss!
But happier times were ahead, and in 2001, he emerged.