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Can I Have a Do-Over
by
russman
12-08-16
What do you want this time?
I feel that the prison sentence sort of voided the deal we made 20 years ago.
You wanted to be with beautiful woman who were half your age. You had that for 10 years.
Yeah, but I agreed to my soul not years in prison.
Stupid humans. Why don't you ever read the contract before signing in your own blood?
In my defense, I was high, there was an extremely hot girl rapidly losing interest. And there was an awful lot of blood.
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12/29/09 - Doughnuts and Ducks or Dress Pinks
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12/27/09 - Can't Fly Without My Wing
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12/24/09 - Better Than Walgreens
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12/21/09 - The More Things Change
12/20/09 - No Excuses
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12/18/09 - Little People Make Me Happy
12/17/09 - McRib is Back
12/16/09 - Shot My Wad
12/15/09 - Daffy Does Dallas
12/15/09 - Lesson Learned
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12/11/09 - You're So Vain
12/10/09 - I Watched One Once
12/09/09 - Home For A Year
12/08/09 - I Like White Meat
12/07/09 - Intended Consequences
12/06/09 - Me and My Special Friend
12/05/09 - Waste Not
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12/03/09 - Not Funny but True
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12/01/09 - What if Check Meant Screw
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11/29/09 - It's Magic To Me
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10/17/09 - Desperate Times and All
10/16/09 - Three Strikes
10/15/09 - My Sucky Sucky Joke
10/14/09 - Girding that Thing That You Gird
10/14/09 - Wasn't Me
10/13/09 - Shy Bladder
10/13/09 - Unemployed Beat Poet
10/12/09 - Does He Doesn't He
10/12/09 - Sterile is Gross
10/11/09 - 2 Out of 3
10/11/09 - End Times Are Near
10/10/09 - Hair gel
10/10/09 - Toothpaste
10/04/09 - Lunch
10/03/09 - That's One Problem I'll Never Face
10/02/09 - Tips and Tips Alone
10/01/09 - It Sucks to Blow
09/30/09 - Not Guilty
09/29/09 - Wrong Reasons
09/28/09 - Rodney the Red Eyed Elf Proctoligist Roach
09/27/09 - Celebrity America's Got talent
09/26/09 - Daddy's Baby
09/25/09 - Endlessly Rewritten Still Not Right
09/24/09 - Just a Test
09/23/09 - To Observe and Report
09/23/09 - Don't Share Everything
09/22/09 - Quick with a Joke
09/20/09 - $5.99 and the Hot Tea is Free
09/19/09 - What If Mind Meant Legs
09/18/09 - I Figured It Out
09/17/09 - Stop Me if You've Heard This
09/16/09 - Mom Knows Best
09/15/09 - They Write Themselves Sometimes
09/14/09 - Another Job I Won't Get
09/13/09 - The Chapman Account
09/12/09 - Fool Me Once
09/11/09 - How Do You Compete With That
09/10/09 - It's All in the Presentation
09/09/09 - Day Off
09/08/09 - MMM Bacon
09/07/09 - Thanks J.K. Harris
09/06/09 - Help Wanted
09/05/09 - Welcome Home
09/04/09 - Stirring the Kettle
09/03/09 - Unforgetable, That's What I Am
09/02/09 - And the Winner is...
09/01/09 - Sponsored By A Cool Dead Person
08/31/09 - Great Expectations
08/30/09 - The Kindness of Strangers
08/30/09 - What the...
08/28/09 - Too Close to Home
08/27/09 - That's My Story
08/26/09 - Thanks Mom
08/25/09 - Fluids is Fluids
08/24/09 - I Hate Bathroom Attendents
08/23/09 - Better to Pluck it Out and All That
08/22/09 - Tonights the Night or Not
08/22/09 - It could Be Worse
08/20/09 - Sara Loves Animals
08/19/09 - There's No Pleasing Some People
08/18/09 - We'll Be Here All Week
08/17/09 - Oh the Shame
08/16/09 - Shore Leave
08/15/09 - Security Now
08/14/09 - A Gentle Breeze
08/13/09 - I Brought Protection
08/12/09 - Death, Where is Thy Sting? Oh, there it is.
08/11/09 - Chad's Day Off
08/11/09 - Turkies are Not Mans' Best Friend
11/20/05 - It's my birthday
11/17/05 - The eternal optimist
11/17/05 - Public butt kissing
11/17/05 - I eat healthy in my jokes
11/14/05 - What?
11/14/05 - Solving One Problem at a Time
11/14/05 - Just relax. You'll feel a little prick.
11/13/05 - Today I do nothing (yeah right)
11/13/05 - I don't smoke but I bet I die anyway
11/10/05 - Narration by Dr. Hook
11/09/05 - That's not crazy..Is it?
11/06/05 - Just a Joke (for Once)
11/05/05 - Am I Fired Yet
10/30/05 - I don't Want to go out
10/30/05 - Babysitter part 3
10/30/05 - The Babysitter
10/30/05 - The babysitter shows up
10/30/05 - Trick or Treat
10/29/05 - I Hate my Job
10/28/05 - It actually worked one time
10/28/05 - Never debate a rabbit
10/27/05 - Even Vulcans need Arm Candy
10/27/05 - Let's Draw Straws
10/27/05 - Life Goes On
10/21/05 - Let's see what happens
10/19/05 - McThis
10/19/05 - Visual storytelling
10/19/05 - Don't listen to the bird
10/19/05 - Quick with the Quip
10/18/05 - My world and welcome to it
10/17/05 - Shopping with the Mrs.
10/16/05 - Boys night out
10/16/05 - 2nd chances are over rated
10/16/05 - Listen carefully
10/16/05 - Missed oportunities
10/16/05 - Always have a plan B
10/16/05 - It Could be a Party
09/10/05 - Mom's at Work
09/07/05 - No Good deed goes Unpunished
09/06/05 - It tastes like chicken
09/05/05 - Don't feel Guilty
08/27/05 - Stuff I think about the night before my flight
07/21/05 - Mom's Favorite
07/05/05 - By the Hour
07/04/05 - Sweep the Floor
06/30/05 - Band Names.I Got Your Band Names
06/30/05 - I Already Forgot
06/30/05 - Hide and Seek
06/29/05 - Round 1
06/29/05 - Set Them free
06/28/05 - Whipped?
06/27/05 - The More Things Change
06/26/05 - Larry can't shake his past
06/25/05 - Let the Game Begin
06/23/05 - I really am sorry
06/22/05 - Show and Tell
06/22/05 - My Greatest Fear
06/21/05 - A Bet is a Bet
06/21/05 - Can You Forgive me Now
06/19/05 - Screwy rabbit.
06/16/05 - Can't Find a Better Man
06/15/05 - We need more reality TV
06/15/05 - Fix the Goat
06/13/05 - My token Michael Jackson Joke
06/12/05 - Inbedded?
06/11/05 - GM troubles affect us all.
06/09/05 - A good Pun or a Terrible Joke. You be the Judge.
06/08/05 - Rollo rolls but never falls.
06/08/05 - No skin diet.
06/07/05 - I'm too cute to forage
06/06/05 - The Love Boat
06/05/05 - Farmer Brown Likes to Shop
06/02/05 - Today at School
06/02/05 - A typical night out
06/01/05 - Love at first charge
06/01/05 - Another day at the office
05/30/05 - Candy from strangers
05/29/05 - First Love
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Brad Sucks
