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She Hasn't Texted Back
by
russman
4-15-17
So I get this text from the slut in the middle of the night. She says to come over she feels like giving a blow job.
I respond can't you find someone closer. I don't feel like making the half hour drive.
I know I'm getting old, 10 years ago I would've walked the 20 miles in the rain, if I thought a girl might touch it.
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russman's Comics
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12/30/09 - Don't We All
12/29/09 - Doughnuts and Ducks or Dress Pinks
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12/26/09 - Maybe We're Winning
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12/18/09 - Little People Make Me Happy
12/17/09 - McRib is Back
12/16/09 - Shot My Wad
12/15/09 - Daffy Does Dallas
12/15/09 - Lesson Learned
12/13/09 - They're So Cute At That Age
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12/11/09 - You're So Vain
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12/09/09 - Home For A Year
12/08/09 - I Like White Meat
12/07/09 - Intended Consequences
12/06/09 - Me and My Special Friend
12/05/09 - Waste Not
12/04/09 - Another Way the White Woman Keeps the Black Man Down
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10/14/09 - Girding that Thing That You Gird
10/14/09 - Wasn't Me
10/13/09 - Shy Bladder
10/13/09 - Unemployed Beat Poet
10/12/09 - Does He Doesn't He
10/12/09 - Sterile is Gross
10/11/09 - 2 Out of 3
10/11/09 - End Times Are Near
10/10/09 - Hair gel
10/10/09 - Toothpaste
10/04/09 - Lunch
10/03/09 - That's One Problem I'll Never Face
10/02/09 - Tips and Tips Alone
10/01/09 - It Sucks to Blow
09/30/09 - Not Guilty
09/29/09 - Wrong Reasons
09/28/09 - Rodney the Red Eyed Elf Proctoligist Roach
09/27/09 - Celebrity America's Got talent
09/26/09 - Daddy's Baby
09/25/09 - Endlessly Rewritten Still Not Right
09/24/09 - Just a Test
09/23/09 - To Observe and Report
09/23/09 - Don't Share Everything
09/22/09 - Quick with a Joke
09/20/09 - $5.99 and the Hot Tea is Free
09/19/09 - What If Mind Meant Legs
09/18/09 - I Figured It Out
09/17/09 - Stop Me if You've Heard This
09/16/09 - Mom Knows Best
09/15/09 - They Write Themselves Sometimes
09/14/09 - Another Job I Won't Get
09/13/09 - The Chapman Account
09/12/09 - Fool Me Once
09/11/09 - How Do You Compete With That
09/10/09 - It's All in the Presentation
09/09/09 - Day Off
09/08/09 - MMM Bacon
09/07/09 - Thanks J.K. Harris
09/06/09 - Help Wanted
09/05/09 - Welcome Home
09/04/09 - Stirring the Kettle
09/03/09 - Unforgetable, That's What I Am
09/02/09 - And the Winner is...
09/01/09 - Sponsored By A Cool Dead Person
08/31/09 - Great Expectations
08/30/09 - The Kindness of Strangers
08/30/09 - What the...
08/28/09 - Too Close to Home
08/27/09 - That's My Story
08/26/09 - Thanks Mom
08/25/09 - Fluids is Fluids
08/24/09 - I Hate Bathroom Attendents
08/23/09 - Better to Pluck it Out and All That
08/22/09 - Tonights the Night or Not
08/22/09 - It could Be Worse
08/20/09 - Sara Loves Animals
08/19/09 - There's No Pleasing Some People
08/18/09 - We'll Be Here All Week
08/17/09 - Oh the Shame
08/16/09 - Shore Leave
08/15/09 - Security Now
08/14/09 - A Gentle Breeze
08/13/09 - I Brought Protection
08/12/09 - Death, Where is Thy Sting? Oh, there it is.
08/11/09 - Chad's Day Off
08/11/09 - Turkies are Not Mans' Best Friend
11/20/05 - It's my birthday
11/17/05 - The eternal optimist
11/17/05 - Public butt kissing
11/17/05 - I eat healthy in my jokes
11/14/05 - What?
11/14/05 - Solving One Problem at a Time
11/14/05 - Just relax. You'll feel a little prick.
11/13/05 - Today I do nothing (yeah right)
11/13/05 - I don't smoke but I bet I die anyway
11/10/05 - Narration by Dr. Hook
11/09/05 - That's not crazy..Is it?
11/06/05 - Just a Joke (for Once)
11/05/05 - Am I Fired Yet
10/30/05 - I don't Want to go out
10/30/05 - Babysitter part 3
10/30/05 - The Babysitter
10/30/05 - The babysitter shows up
10/30/05 - Trick or Treat
10/29/05 - I Hate my Job
10/28/05 - It actually worked one time
10/28/05 - Never debate a rabbit
10/27/05 - Even Vulcans need Arm Candy
10/27/05 - Let's Draw Straws
10/27/05 - Life Goes On
10/21/05 - Let's see what happens
10/19/05 - McThis
10/19/05 - Visual storytelling
10/19/05 - Don't listen to the bird
10/19/05 - Quick with the Quip
10/18/05 - My world and welcome to it
10/17/05 - Shopping with the Mrs.
10/16/05 - Boys night out
10/16/05 - 2nd chances are over rated
10/16/05 - Listen carefully
10/16/05 - Missed oportunities
10/16/05 - Always have a plan B
10/16/05 - It Could be a Party
09/10/05 - Mom's at Work
09/07/05 - No Good deed goes Unpunished
09/06/05 - It tastes like chicken
09/05/05 - Don't feel Guilty
08/27/05 - Stuff I think about the night before my flight
07/21/05 - Mom's Favorite
07/05/05 - By the Hour
07/04/05 - Sweep the Floor
06/30/05 - Band Names.I Got Your Band Names
06/30/05 - I Already Forgot
06/30/05 - Hide and Seek
06/29/05 - Round 1
06/29/05 - Set Them free
06/28/05 - Whipped?
06/27/05 - The More Things Change
06/26/05 - Larry can't shake his past
06/25/05 - Let the Game Begin
06/23/05 - I really am sorry
06/22/05 - Show and Tell
06/22/05 - My Greatest Fear
06/21/05 - A Bet is a Bet
06/21/05 - Can You Forgive me Now
06/19/05 - Screwy rabbit.
06/16/05 - Can't Find a Better Man
06/15/05 - We need more reality TV
06/15/05 - Fix the Goat
06/13/05 - My token Michael Jackson Joke
06/12/05 - Inbedded?
06/11/05 - GM troubles affect us all.
06/09/05 - A good Pun or a Terrible Joke. You be the Judge.
06/08/05 - Rollo rolls but never falls.
06/08/05 - No skin diet.
06/07/05 - I'm too cute to forage
06/06/05 - The Love Boat
06/05/05 - Farmer Brown Likes to Shop
06/02/05 - Today at School
06/02/05 - A typical night out
06/01/05 - Love at first charge
06/01/05 - Another day at the office
05/30/05 - Candy from strangers
05/29/05 - First Love
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diesel sweeties
jerkcity
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ko fight club
penny arcade
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Brad Sucks
