Having almost initiated conversations about food (ie Beef Korma), I thought it would be interesting to have a thread devoted to swapping recipes.

I love cooking, so have a lot of recipes to list here. I'll start with ANZAC biscuits, because I made them yesterday, and they are yummy.

ANZAC (Australia and New Zealand Amry Corps) Biscuits. First made at Gallipoli, so legend has it, during World War One.

1 cup of plain flour
1 cup of sugar
1 cup of dessicated coconut
1 cup of rolled oats (flattend, not quick or porridge oats)
125 grams Butter
1 Tablespoon of Golden Syrup (though treacle may work)
1 level teaspoon of Bi-Carbonate of Soda
2 - 3 Tablespoons of Boiling water

Mix together the first four ingredients.

Melt the butter, remove from heat and add the golden syrup and the bi-carb disolved in two tablespoons of boiling water. Stir well.

Make a well in the centre of the flour and stir in the liquid mixture. If the mixture is still a little dry, add the third tablespoon of boiling water.

Place in teaspoonfuls on a greased tray. The mixture spreads out when cooking, so don't put them too close together.

Bake for 15 minutes in a moderate oven (180 degrees celcius). They are cooked when they have turned a lovely golden colour.

Allow to cool on the baking tray.

Enjoy

how to make a spankling:
sit on toilet and wait.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

Here is an intersting food related article.

And, D-co... I see you're trying to be funny again. But what did mommy say about that? Hmmm?

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

I make a really good carrot cake, I'll post it later if you want.

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

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1 Tablespoon of Golden Syrup (though treacle may work)

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1 Tablespoon of Golden Syrup (though treacle may work)

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I hope this isn't what I think it is.

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Well, seeing that my family and friends are currently trying to convince me to open a bakery/tea room/bath & body store.....I'll dig some of my "specialties" up and post them.

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Women are fisher's of men because we all know.... The small ones you throw back. The medium ones you eat. The large ones you mount.

birthday cake for friends:

1 box of cake mix
1 egg
1 pint of milk
1 lump of mud
1 bar of chocolate
1 bottle of fairy liquid
lots of crack
4 egg shells
whole can of beer
milkshake mix
crack
beer
minced lamb
crack
icing sugar

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Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

quote:

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birthday cake for friends:

1 box of cake mix
1 egg
1 pint of milk
1 lump of mud
1 bar of chocolate
1 bottle of fairy liquid
lots of crack
4 egg shells
whole can of beer
milkshake mix
crack
beer
minced lamb
crack
icing sugar

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ORANGE GLAZED PORK CHOPS

4 Pork chops, 3/4" thick
Salt & Pepper to taste, brown in oil.
Mix together 1/2 cup orange juice,
3 Tablespoons brown sugar,
3 Tablespoons orange marmalade,
1 Tablespoon vinegar (cider is best)
Pour over chops, cover & simmer until tender
(about 45 minutes)
Spoon sauce over chops & serve.

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Pardon the male-style of careful measuring.

KEN'S FAMOUS MEATBALLS

2 lbs. (.9 kg) ground chuck
4 eggs' insides
1 bunch grated cheese
1/2 cup bread crumbs
3 lbs. spaghetti sauce
As much garlic powder as you can get away with
A bit of pepper
Some oregano
And some basil

Put most of the sauce, a good amount of the cheese, and a bit of the garlic into a wide pot.

Separately mix the rest of the stuff well, roll into balls, and put into the pot.

Cover and put on low heat (can be a bit higher at the start, but return it to low once the sauce starts convecting).

Stir sauce occasionally, rotate balls every half hour or so, and let it cook about 2 hours.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

It's been a long time since I rotated any balls.

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

[Click to view comic: 'Full of Golden Goodness']

The only thing I can make perfectly, is a cheese and ham omlette, you'll honestly never eat a better omlette anywhere in the world.

Sadly, I can only make it when I'm completely blind drunk, so I don't know the recipe, I just have flash backs of a tasty meal the morning after.

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Dad was flammable

...so how can you be sure it wasn't fucking awful? You were pissed, remember...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

I can almost use the microwave.

okay funny story about drunken breakfasts.

A friend of mine was on contract in the islands. He got blind ass drunk on some of the local brew. He called his wife the next morning, very remorseful saying that he thought he had gotten so drunk that he might have "misbehaved" So of course, the wife was highly pissed off all day. Turns out...he had woken up in a stupor at one point and made himself a sardine and peanut butter sandwhich before passing out again...needless to say..when he woke up with a wicked hangover and a horrid sense of taste and smell..he thought the worst. He didn't remember having the sandwich till he walked into the kitchen, he then called his wife, and explained. We still give him grief to this day..and inevitably whenever we all party, someone always has to make a "PB&S" sandwich for him.

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Women are fisher's of men because we all know.... The small ones you throw back. The medium ones you eat. The large ones you mount.

A friend of mine was once at a party during which ,much weed was smoked. He didn't have much himself, just enough for a nice buzz, but some of the other partygoers got badly fucked-up. Toward the end of the party, he wandered into the kitchen and found a completely shattered bloke sitting on the floor, leaning against the fridge, chewing on a frozen lamb chop.

Ick...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Were you the "Completely Shattered Bloke"?

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

Nope. When I get the munchies, I must have Pringles.

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

That sardine story shall bother me forever.

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What others say about boorite!

I like cooking, but my greatest creation was my attempt to rip off the tuna salad the local deli made for $8 a freakin pound. I did a damn good job, too.

For every two cans of tuna, you need:

Two slices red onion, diced
Four wedges green apple, also diced
Three ground garlic cloves
About 1/4th cup of alfalfa sprouts

It's just like some overpriced restaraunt's.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

I got this recipe out of "The New Basics" cookbook. I make this pie every for every Thanksgiving and Christmas gathering. If I'm going to see my wife's family, I have to leave one behind for my family!

Hint #1: Increase the all the dough ingredients by 50% and it will make your life easier when you try to fit the dough into the pie dish. If you have extra dough and filling, make little mini-pies using a cupcake tin.

Hint #2: Granny Smith apples. Trust no other.

Apple of Her Eye Pie

Pastry:
3 cups Unbleached All-Purpose flour
1/4 cup Sugar
1 tsp. Dry mustard
Pinch of Salt
8 TBL Unsalted butter, cold (1 stick)
1/3 cup Sharp Cheddar cheese, shredded
6-8 TBL Ice water

Filling:
8 Tart apples (ie. Granny Smith, etc.)
4 TBL Unsalted butter, melted
1/2 cup + 2 TBL Sugar
2 TBL Cornstarch
3/4 tsp. Cinnamon
1 tsp. Grated lemon zest
1 tsp. Vanilla

Topping:
1 tsp. Sugar
Pinch of Cinnamon

Prepare the pastry dough: Combine the flour, sugar, mustard and salt in a mixing bowl and toss well to blend. Using a pastry blender, 2 knives or your fingertips, cut in the butter and shortening until the mixture forms small clumps. Then add the cheese and work it in until the mixture resembles coarse crumbs.

Sprinkle the water, 2 tablespoons at a time, over the mixture and toss with a fork until the mixture can be gathered into a ball. Knead it once or twice in the bowl and divide it into slightly unequal halves. Wrap both halves and chill in the fridge for 45 min.

Meanwhile, preheat the oven to 350 degrees.

Prepare the filling: Peel, core and halve the apples; cut them into 1" chunks. Combine the apples and melted butter in a large bowl. Add the remaining filling ingredients and toss until the apples are evenly coated.

Roll the smaller portion of the chilled dough out on a lightly floured surface to form a 12" circle. Transfer it to a 10" pie plate and press it into the bottom and sides of the plate. Trim the dough, leaving a 1" overhang. Reserve any excess dough.

Roll the larger portion of dough out to form a slightly larger circle.

Fill the pie plate with the apple mixture, mounding it slightly. Brush the edge of the bottom crust with water, then transfer the top crust over the apples, tucking it slightly inside the rim. Trim off any excess, allowing a 1" overhang again. Seal the edges of the crusts together with a fork and crimp decoratively. Trim away any remaining excess pastry.

Prepare the Topping: Mix together the sugar and cinnamon. Prick the top crust with a fork in several places and cut a small vent in the center. Brush the top lightly with water and sprinkle it with the cinnamon sugar. If you like, cut out shapes, such as leaves or apples, from the dough trimmings and decorate the top crust with them.

Bake until the filling is bubbling and the top is golden, about 1 1/4 hours. (I usually cook the pie for an hour, let it cool, and freeze it. That way when I thaw and reheat it, it won't be overcooked).

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Next time you make an omelette, try using half and half and 9 eggs. Do it in a large saute pan and coat it with clarified butter and spray it with Pam(tm) first, cook the botom and middle, then cook the top under the broiler. When you release it, slide it off onto a large plate whole. It's like pan quiche. About 2" around the edges. Whip the living crap out of the eggs and half and half, too. Mmmmmm.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

This is the spaghetti that I attempted to foist off on everybody at the Cleveland Munch Meet, btw:

BUNNERGHETTI:
This is my basic, tarted-up spaghetti sauce w/ capellini recipe. It's actually quite good.
1/2 - White Onion / large
4 - cloves Fresh Garlic
2 - Oz. Good Red Wine (No screw top crap)
1- Lb. Fresh mushrooms
3- Lbs. Lean Ground Beef.
Salt
Pepper
Italian Spice Blend
Crushed Rosemary
Garlic Powder
Olive Oil
2- Pkgs. Angel Hair Spaghetti
4- Cans Hunts Garlic and Cheese Flavoured Spaghetti Sauce (Tres Cheap)
1- Jar High End, Snooty, Big Deal Spaghetti Sauce (Your Choice)
1- Lb. Fresh grated Romano Cheese
Take a LARGE skillet and put the ground beef into it and chop it up with the edge of a non-stick plastic spatula as it cooks so that you have small, crumbled bits of beef.
Dice the 1/2 White Onion and add to the beef as it cooks. Stir in. Ditto the garlic cloves.
As the beef cooks, add salt, pepper, onion powder, and a dash of the Italian Seasoning blend and a dash of the garlic powder.
When the beef is thoroughly cooked, drain the fat off with a colander and put the beef into a large stockpot.
Clean, de-stem and slice fresh mushrooms. Put olive oil in the just-washed skillet and saute the mushroom slices until tender and browned.
Add cooked mushrooms, oil and all, to the beef mixture.
Add the 4 cans of Hunts spaghetti sauce and the jar of snazzy, expensive spaghetti sauce to the beef and mushroom mixture and stir thoroughly over medium heat.
Add a few dashes of crushed rosemary, Italian seasonings blend, garlic powder and the wine to the sauce as it cooks and stir.
Set a large stock pot full of cold water to boil on the stove. Add 2 Oz. Olive oil and salt liberally. When it starts boiling, add the Angel Hair spaghetti and boil until desired done-ness is apparent. (Eat a couple as it boils.)
Thoroughly rinse and drain cooked spaghetti in colander using COLD water.
Make sure the spaghetti drains completely.
Put some of the spaghetti on a plate, top with sauce, dust with Romano cheese.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.