CC68: Tobor Visits the Rathskeller by wirthling 10-01-01

Hang on there, Big Red! You gotta be twenty-one to enter. Can I see your I.D.? TOBOR NOT NEED I.D.!!! DOES NOT TOBOR LOOK AT LEAST TWENTY-ONE? I don't see any rust on those hinges, pal! No I.D., no drinky! RAAAR!!! UH, OK. TOBOR WILL PROVIDE IDENTIFICATION TO FLESHY SENTINEL!!! This is the title for a 1978 Chevy Malibu. You don't look anything like a Chevy Malibu, bub. VROOOOM!!! BEEP BEEP?

Uh, a human is technically an animal. And Tobor is an animal - a party animal! Heh heh. Oy.

I was going to use an animal but I thought that the explodingdog guy worked much better. I figured that kaufman already has us all beat anyway...

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

CC68: Tobor Gets a Study Date by wirthling 10-01-01

Hey, Tobor, I was wondering if you could help me study tonight for our physics exam. YES!!! TOBOR WILL GET LUCKY TONIGHT!!! I was hoping you could help me bone up on hydraulics. If you're up for it, we can make it an all-night cram session! RAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAARRR!!! GACK! Tobor! Are you OK?! fatal exception 0E at 013F:0000663D

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Damn you Wirthling. I nearly sprayed my Guinness Extra Stout all over the keyboard. The keys would have never stopped sticking.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Creamed Corn by fuzzyman 10-01-01

Good morning, class. Can anyone tell me who invented corn--- ZZZzzzzzz OOH! OHH! I KNOW THE ANSWER! Yes, Tobor? ZZZzzzzzz TOBOR INVENTED CORNHOLING. TOBOR IS THE MASTER! ASSUME THE POSITION, AND I WILL SHOW YOU, FLESHLING. Tobor, this is Native American Agriculture 101. Mmmmm... corn. NATIVE AMERICANS INVENTED CORNHOLING?

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

I dont vote in this one , but oh god , that wins by a clear mile.

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

Yes, those are real knowledge transmutations. Will lecture for food.

Midterm Lecture: Introduction to Artificial Intelligence by kaufman 10-01-01

... so through the process of *abstraction*, the robot simplifies its knowledge base, maintaining only information relevant to its task. The opposite transmutation, the augmentation of a description, is called *concretion*. Can anyone give me an example? Ooh, ooh, Dr. Kaufman, like this! Yeah, right, Shanahan, you're just lucky I have a sense of humor. Hey, we agree in principle, we just differ in the cementics.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

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See this takes place in a dorm, but i didn't know how to make sure.

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Tobor Shaketh his Collegiate Speare by NastyPope 10-01-01

So, Mr... Tobor is it? yes? good. Tell us a little why you want to be a drama major. For as long as Tobor remembers, Tobor has had difficulty expressing true feelings. Tobor wants world to see true self. Days and Nights become blurred as Tobor works tirelessly to become a true Shakespearian actor. How now, spirit! Wither wander you? Over Hill, Over grass, Tobor will cornhole Puck's ASS!!!! Over park, over... LINE!!! Several months have passed... To Cornhole or not to Cornhole, that is the question. Wether tis nobler to suffer the violent_anal_dialations, or by putting sand in the vaseline, end them.

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At least im still funny .....looking. http://www.carrionfields.com

CC68 by ObiJo 10-02-01

KARAOKE?!! TOBOR CAN'T SING!!! TOBOR'S ROOMMATES ALWAYS DO STUFF TOBOR CAN'T DO!!! TOBOR FEELS LEFT OUT!!! RAAAAR!!! Trust me this time, big guy. Later... You RAAAAR!!! So beautiful To me.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC68: College changes a Man by ObiJo 10-02-01

Age 5 cornhole! raaar! Age 15 CORNHOLE!!! RAAAAR!!! Age 25 NACHOS!!! RAAAR!!! Anything to drink with that?

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC68: To Bore or Not to Bore by ObiJo 10-02-01

What's wrong? It's just a little hit. I mean, unless you're scared. SCARED?!! TOBOR CORNHOLE MERE SUGGESTION!!! PASS TOBOR FIRE STICK!!! 2 Hours later Dude, we've ALL thought about it, right? Just THINKING about it doesn't make you gay, right? Homefry? The next morning Man, you were acting REALLY gay last night. RAAAAR?

I guess I'll go with the manimal loophole again. Or you can just not accept it. I usually don't believe in submitting so many anyways. I just liked these too much.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC-LXVIII - Reading Tobor loud and clear... by DexX 10-02-01

During the final exam... Damn! Tobor does not know answers to any of this shit... That puny fleshling seems confident... Tum te tum... *scratch scratch* *rustle* *cough* RAARR!!! TELL TOBOR ANSWER TO QUESTION FOUR, OR TOBOR WILL CORNHOLE YOU RIGHT NOW!!! What the fuck...? ...and it is the decision of this committee that Tobor Robot will be expelled for academic misconduct... *sigh* Tobor wishes manufacturer had installed whisper capabilities...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

CC68- Tobor joins Geek Squad by kramer_vs_kramer 10-02-01

Hi there. Can I interest you in joining the university gaming society? RAAR! TOBOR ONLY INTERESTED IN CORNHOLING GAMES! There's no cornholing I'm afraid. It's strictly live roleplaying where we run around the woods in loincloths. TOBOR LIKES PUTTING WOOD IN LOINCLOTHS. TOBOR WISHES TO JOIN. Well you're more than welcome to come along with us. Do you have a weapon? I have a latex samurai sword. I call it DragonSmiter. LATEX? TOBOR NOT INTO THAT. SOON YOU WILL FACE TOBOR'S MIGHTY STAFF, ARSESPLITTER.

CC 68: Zzzz... by BigEvilDan 10-02-01

...and if we identify two seperate bases for the vector space... ...we can convert the linear transformation into a simple mxn matrix... RARR!!!! After class... Well I appreciate the sentiment, Tobor, a simple nudge would wake me up next time. BUT TOBOR NEED SOMETHING TO KEEP HIM OCCUPIED AS WELL!!

I was considering taking the manimal route on this one, but I decided to play within the spirit of the rules.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

CC 68: Anime Antics by itsclark 10-02-01

College of the Hentai Arts and Sciences: OK class! Once again, each of you will receive a lab specimen similar to THIS ONE. However, in light of last week's little incident... ...Mr. Tobor will be receiving a replacement specimen. May I REMIND you, Mr. Tobor, that this IS a lab specimen and NOT A HAND PUPPET!! RAARR!! TOBOR NOT NOMINATED "CLASS CLOWN" FOR NOTHING!

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Well everyone I've decided to end this one a little early. About 5 hours early. I was gonna end it later tonight because I thought my girlfriend was coming over after school but now shes at home so I'll just end it now. Hope this doesn't make anyone to mad.

Here's the finalists:
kaufman - PHYSICS 101 made me spit out cereal everywhere.
vekktor - That was easily one of the worst TOBOR strips I've ever seen. Since your a newbie maybe you haven't picked up on the in-joke yet.
wirthling - TOBOR gets a study date was brillant.
ObiJo - TOBOR karaoke!
But there can only be one winning strip and that strip is........

CC 68: Physics 101 by kaufman 10-01-01

... which approaches zero as the torque increases. Thus, Max's Theorem spells out the requirements for graviton generation. Any questions? TOBOR DON'T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT.

I hope no one is to angry about me ending this contest early.

CC 68- Tobor has enough "A-levels" for University by lara7 10-02-01

Freshman History Class, week 2 Who can tell me what happened to the British monarchy in the 1640's? Yes, Tobor? RAAAR! ROUNDHEADS WILL CROMWELL YOU! Uh, close enough. And by what right did Cromwell dissolve the Parliament? RAAR! MANDATE!! DIVINE MANDATE! Apple polishing brainiac... Teacher's pet...

I think I should get extra points for the "a-levels" joke, especially since I'm not British.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

TOBOR HAVE MASSIVE PAINTBRUSH by Spankling 10-02-01

Just fabulous! The use of motion in the paints sends me reeling! And you say the artist is a new freshman? Yep. An unknown. He got into the institute by cornholing the museum's curator - nearly split the guy in two. Oh... That old queen must have loved that. So where is the artist now? Working the room. I think the curator is looking for seconds. I could do wonders for your career big red. Let's leave these philistines for a quickie in the Monet room. TOBOR ONLY FINISH WIPING YOUR FILTH OFF ON THESE WALLS! TOBOR WANT SOMEONE NEW - HE THINK BALD GUY LOOK TIGHT!

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"Jelly-belly gigglin, dancin and a-wigglin, honey that's the way I am!" Janice the Muppet

I *thought* I got it. I also tried to intentionally break every rule of TOBOR I could find. So much for pushing the bounds of a cultural icon... :)

But hey, I got noticed...

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VEKKTOR: Winner of the coveted "Worst TOBOR Strip Crabby Has Ever Seen Award", 1 year running.

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I *thought* I got it. I also tried to intentionally break every rule of TOBOR I could find. So much for pushing the bounds of a cultural icon... :)

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vekktor - That was easily one of the worst TOBOR strips I've ever seen. Since your a newbie maybe you haven't picked up on the in-joke yet.

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But kaufman's is great excuse to post Cowboy Physics again. :)

Cowboy physics by max 1-06-01

One day at the ranch... So I says, "Well, them rotor turbines ain't gonna generate gravitons by themselves!" Ha, ha! What the fuck are you talking about?

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III

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vekktor - That was easily one of the worst TOBOR strips I've ever seen. Since your a newbie maybe you haven't picked up on the in-joke yet.

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In attempt to redeem myself and restore the hallowed name of TOBOR...

BTW It's a shame it ended early. Spankling's comic is great.

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