Good:

Here's my list. See if you can spot the fake entries! Circle them on your screen with red pen.

[list]
[*]Got a pretty decent job which I enjoy, is very easy and pays well
[*]Bought a swank new Passat
[*]Started taking Aikido lessons and passed the test for my first kyu rank
[*]Started a fledgling company with some friends
[*]Read the Wheel of Time series again; got three books further into it this time
[*]Solved Fermat's last theorem.
[*]Got to drive a BMW M5
[*]Learned I have a half sister I didn't know about
[*]Found a fantastic new friend
[*]Climbed K2 with no oxygen and no socks
[*]Got a new 16x CD burner
[*]Just for fun picked up a part time job teaching swimming at my health club
[*]Met bunner and finally bought him that drink I owed him. Found him to be throroughly fascinating and damned funny.
[*]Got a laptop and wired the house with Ethernet
[*]My wife started moonlighting and increased our income dramatically. (see laptop, above)
[*]Conquered Portugal
[/list]

Bad:

Either nothing really bad ever happens to me or I forget about it. I can't really come up with anything aside from my dog occaisonally pooping in the basement.

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

quote:

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Good:

Here's my list. See if you can spot the fake entries! Circle them on your screen with red pen.

[list]
[*]Got a pretty decent job which I enjoy, is very easy and pays well
[*]Bought a swank new Passat
[*]Started taking Aikido lessons and passed the test for my first kyu rank
[*]Solved Fermat's last theorem.
[*]Got to drive a BMW M5
[*]Learned I have a half sister I didn't know about
[*]Found a fantastic new friend
[*]Climbed K2 with no oxygen and no socks
[*]Got a laptop and wired the house with Ethernet
[*]My wife started moonlighting and increased our income dramatically. (see laptop, above)
[*]Conquered Portugal
[/list]

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quote:

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quote:

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Good:
Went the whole summer only masturbating once (and yes, it is true).

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Forgive my ignorance, but how is this good?

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quote:

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[list]
[*]Got a pretty decent job which I enjoy, is very easy and pays well
[*]FAKE - Bought a swank new Passat
[*]Started taking Aikido lessons and passed the test for my first kyu rank-[/list]

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Fake: Conquered Portugal

Logic: He could have bought Portugal for the price of the Passat and the Laptop, and saved himself from some small arms fire and possible pitchfork injuries.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

I dunno. That part about bunner being fascinating is a little too rich to be real. The rest seems true, though.

Again, for those of you playing at home, this was sarcasm.

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

Fake:Solved Fermat's last theorem.
Logic:Because Fermat may return from the dead to write more theorems, there's no way we can be sure that his current last one will always be the last one.

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My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. -Weird Al Yankovic

Is this needed at the end of all your posts from now on? Tell everyone who doesn't realize it's sarcasm to fuck off.

Ah, Scots.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

There are over 38,000 bridges in the United States.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

quote:

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- puking on my dad
- puking on my dad (again)
- puking on my dad (yeah, im stupid again)

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Cholesteatoma?

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Ah, Scots...

Andy beat me to it. I really should read through the thread before posting, but I'm hungover...

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

Highlights:

[list]
[*]I bought my first house
[*]I was not a victim of my company's "force management plan," which resulted in half of the company looking for new jobs.
[*]I discovered Stripcreator and have made a bunch of virtual friends. They all rock, except that spunkhoover Gabe Billings.
[/list]

Lowlights:

[list]
[*]My cat developed diabetes.
[*]We lost some pay due to the actions of a union which purportedly represents my interests.
[*]My wife would like me to include in this list the fact that I discovered Stripcreator.
[/list]

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

The Good
[list]
[*]Cruising along at uni, getting good marks.
[*]Got a new PC.
[*]Found SC.com (well, lowpass.com/stripcreator originally) and watched it gather a great community.
[*]Made a lot of art, on paper, on the PC, and with both, which I was very proud of.
[*]My wife is still under the impression that I am a wonderful husband and a great partner to share her life with.
[*]Finally got to see TMBG live.
[/list]

The Bad
[list]
[*]Pretty much all of August - burglary, car crash, major money troubles, and a double-whammy of bronchitis and laryngitis.
[*]WTC - nuff said.
[*]Went for a job interview, went really well, but the slack bastard was too busy to get back to me about it.
[*]The money situation is really fucking bad right now.
[*]Got evicted again!
[*]Had a major falling out with another online community I was in, and lost a bunch of e-friends.
[/list]

There are more, but it is nudging 5am right now...

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This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

Not one of my better decades, but here goes:

The Good

* I am not currently on fire.
* I recovered from a knee injury and should be ready to tackle an active, fast-paced lifestyle (in the unlikely event that I actually develope one).
* I'm surrounded by fans. All of them electric.

The Bad

* My stock fund report for the past year reads simply "Ka-boom".
* I don't understand my job.
* I've failed to escape my deteriorating neighborhood. And my neighbors won't share thier crack.
* Each year the single life seems less a sign of free-wheelin' independence and more like a red 'L' stapled to my forhead.
* I have a drinking problem that is increasingly difficult to overcome. It's called "tolerance".

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

Is this needed at the end of all your posts from now on? Tell everyone who doesn't realize it's sarcasm to fuck off.

That approach wasn't working. I decided to diversify.

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I am a delicate fucking flower. https://beacons.ai/jesskent

quote:

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Worst:
1)Now I'm looking for work with two young kids I'm hoping to keep in private schools and a new mortgage to support. (Lara - what do you do for a living and where did you find that Seattle job? We might be neighbors. Look me up when you get here.)

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[Click to view comic: 'If Gabe Had Really Proven Fermat's Last Theorem']

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Good
- The new cats getting comfortable as part of our family
- Crossing 40 with no particularly ill effects
- Having an interesting job
- Celebrating three relatives' 90th birthdays!
- Being led down the rabbit hole into stripcreator
- Two great trips to Canada
- Finishing in the money in a session of a championship-level bridge event
- An audience with The King

Bad
- Politics, assholes, and lack of adequate supporting personnel at work
- 9/11 and its aftermath
- Retirement investments that seem to be managed by monkeys, only not as well
- A mysterious problem with the home computer that everyone passes the buck about, and won't fix, but renders it virtually incapable of doing some basic and needed stuff.

Ugly
That I've forgotten whatever else should be on those two lists

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

quote:

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Good
- Being led down the rabbit hole into stripcreator

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Bad: All I can remember is my cat dying, but I'm sure there was something else. Oh yeah, all my retirement funds surely tanked. I'm afraid to open the statement.

Good: New kittens and furniture. Still alive and employed.

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What others say about boorite!

quote:

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Good:
...Went the whole summer only masturbating once (and yes, it is true).

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quote:

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Good: New kittens and furniture. Still alive and employed.

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Are you sure this doesn't go into the ugly column?

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.