CC 164: Contains Course Language by bonwag 1-10-03

I'd like to enrol for the language course. Language, Coarse. Sure. Here are the materials.   *   Having reviewed the materials, I'd like to withdraw my enrolment. Well, Shit.

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exit, pursued by a bear

Contest 164 by il_schmucko 1-10-03

What do you think about good ol' Middle Mississippi State? Oh, it's okay. Classes are easy. Well, sounds like you're full of school spirit. Though I must admit, I was expecting something more out of "Intro to White Power."

Contest 164b by il_schmucko 1-10-03

Good morning, class, and welcome to Your Mom 201. As many of you may know, this is just like "Your Mom 101: Survey of Your Mom," only with a more intensive lab component. Seriously. I did today's experiment three times last night.

Contest 164c by il_schmucko 1-10-03

Welcome, and congratulations on being part of the inaugural session of Comparative Abnormal Psychology. Are there any questions so far? Oddly enough, yes.

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"I don't know who you are, schmucko, but you rule." - lara7 | christ@myself.com

good thing these aren't serial.

Contest 164d by il_schmucko 1-10-03

Whatcha doing? Weaving a basket. Oh? I thought that was just a cliche. What are you talking about? You know--"Underwater Basket Weaving." Nope--I'm taking "Intermediate Sheepfucking." This is just a hobby.

Contest 164e by il_schmucko 1-10-03

All right, man--what the hell was up with your final project? Are you trying to wreck the curve for everyone? I mean, seriously--some of us need to pass this class to graduate, you know. If I'd known you were going to be in Bondage and Submission 101, I wouldn't have even signed up. Whatever. Wanna get high?

Contest 164f by il_schmucko 1-10-03

Dude, I am so stoked! I totally aced my Regurgitation project! Glad you brought it up! I gotta cram tonight, though. I have a tough Date Rape final tomorrow. I'd say you'll nail that one. Who knew they'd turn Phi Psi into a major? Who knew I'd flunk out of my Punnery class?

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"I don't know who you are, schmucko, but you rule." - lara7 | christ@myself.com

Rush Job by kaufman 1-10-03

Hey G-man, we're road-tripping up to Tech for the big game this weekend. Care to come along? I'd love to, but my term project is due in a week, I haven't started, and I really don't have time to spare. ... Let there be light.

CC 164: Return to Santa by kaufman 1-10-03

Good morning. I know there was a typo in the catalogue, but this class if for people who want to learn to be Elvis impersonators.

Would you believe "Morris?" by kaufman 1-10-03

Hi, I'm considering taking your Introduction to Suicide Bombing class this fall. Can you tell me a bit about it? We begin with a study of creation of explosives from household items, move on to inciting ignorant populi, and then spin doct... You get an A+. What did you say your name was?

F.S.U. by kaufman 1-10-03

I'm taking Tools 101 this year. I hear Professor Larson is incredible.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

CC 164: Riding the Sillybus by Namgubed 1-10-03

Welcome to Inside Humor 101! Please state your name and declared major. Doctor. Pedantic. TOBOR. MANRAPE! Cowboy. Physics. fuck.

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Philosophy 404: Intro to Nihilism by boorite 1-10-03

Nihilism is the belief that all values are baseless and that nothing can be known or communicated. No it isn't! Yes, it is. A true nihilist would believe in nothing, have no loyalties, and no purpose other than, perhaps, an impulse to destroy. What a crock of shit! Nice try. I'm still going to make you read Nietzsche. Awww, can't we just burn the place down?

Philosophy 404: All about Nothing by boorite 1-10-03

Has nihilism given us a cold, inhuman world where nothingness, incoherence, and absurdity triumph? Mr. Tobor? ARGLE BARGLE BIG GULP FUCKER HA HA HA BOOGER SHOES! Very close, but incorrect. The answer is: There's no way to tell, and it doesn't matter anyway. Rats.

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What others say about boorite!

Eugenics 101 by boorite 1-10-03

First, let us discuss zee Normal Distribution, or "bell curve." Most of you, I suspect, are B and C students... ...a few are D, and fewer still are F students... ...at zee end of zis course, ALL VILL BE 'A' STUDENTS! Mwa hahahaha! *ahem*

Eugenics 101: The "finals" solution by boorite 1-10-03

Dude, I ACED my Eugenics exam. Sweet! Yeah, you wouldn't believe how many people flunked it. Bummer. Nah, prof said they could retake it after they finish their showers. SHOWERS?

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What others say about boorite!

Peanuts Goes to College by kaufman 1-10-03

College is the pinnacle of human achievement, Charlie Brown. Never again will we have such an opportunity to learn and grow. Do you really think so, Linus? To be frank, I'm really dreading freshman year. Oh, come now. It's a chance to spread your wings after the strangulation of adolescence. That's what they say, but I'm just not very excited about my schedule this semester. It can't be that bad, Charlie Brown. Tell me, what are you taking? Football Kicking, Kite Flying, Remedial Dog Feeding, and Wanh Wanh Wanh Wanh 101.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Judge fuck please note: Mine is not a joke about Tobor. It's just that Tobor is in the class, and the word balloon points to him. Thank you.

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What others say about boorite!

You're right about nihilism.

I just thot you'd like to know that.

"God is dead." - Nietzsche

"Nietzsche is dead." -God

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Ham-fisted ham fisting.

CC 164: Classy by NeoVid 1-10-03

Well, class, due to lack of attendance, the school was planning to eliminate Subterfuge 101. This was due to the fact that none of you were ever sure that you were actually in this class. However, I was able to convince them that I would get more students if they simply changed the name of the class to "Introduction to Politics."

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

If there is one thing a lot of people at this site seem to know about is nihilism.

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Welcome to Bohemia. Population: a lot Cash flow: a little

Sometimes I replace "humor" with raging cynicism. Forgive me.

Money Shot by kaufman 1-10-03

Look at this! They're offering Pornography 101. Screw PoliSci, I'm signing up for that instead. I wouldn't do that if I were you. I've heard things. What are you, gay? I'm taking that class, and nothing you say will stop me. Fine, but don't say I didn't warn you. The next day WELL? How was porn class? Sucked. Every five minutes she stopped the film and asked for $100 more tuition.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Thought I'd give it a try...

CC 164 - Give a hoot! by Buffylavalamp 1-11-03

Meanwhile... Oh. Reading a book? Yup. Is it good? Yup. I'm functionally illiterate. Internet Chatrooms 101. Third door on your left.

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Please remember to spay and neuter your elected representatives.

Every Day in Every Way by itsclark 1-11-03

Am I in the right class for my "personal developement" course? Your LATE, you skinny miserable little freak! But I... Sit down and quit disrupting my class. The very sight of you makes me sick! Now then... Who can give me the three principles of self-esteem?

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

I'm back, or something.

Thesis by papabearyg 1-11-03

Okay. Concentrate.You can do this. It's just a thesis...a BA thesis, even. "What I Did On My Summer Vacation..."

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...Objectivity is so subjective...

And another:

Don't Mock My Art: Theses I Haven't Considered. by papabearyg 1-11-03

Underwater Basket Weaving: It's Not Just for Stoners! The 1001 Uses of Hemp That Don't Include A Bong! Sociopolitical Ramifications of Hopscotch! Poke'mon and the Developement of Adolescent Gender! All Your Theses Are Belong To Us! Computer Technology In Higher Education: Educational Tool, or Waste of Time?

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...Objectivity is so subjective...

The CC Fuck is Running. - Pt1 by Kevin_Keegans_Perm 1-09-03

Hi , im here for "Follow the White Rabbit 101" Youre not really here you know. Its all in your mind. Now if you take the blue pill , this course will continue. And if i take the red pill? Youll be a battery powering a light bulb for the rest of your life. Decisions , Decisions .... Did i mention the big breasted chicks in tight fitting rubber?

CC Something or Other - That One Fuck is Running. by Kevin_Keegans_Perm 1-09-03

So this is the matrix huh. Yep. Everyone here is a battery , or lives in a big city underground hiding from the computers that destroyed the world as you know it. And the chicks with big chests and rubber outfits? They all live below ground,look like Winona Rider , and wear outfits that look like sackcloths. I KNEW i shoulda taken "Understanding Lesbianism and your inner sexuality" Wait until you see Dinner. Iron Chef it aint my friend.

CC Thing thats ... ah FUCK IT! - Part 3 by Kevin_Keegans_Perm 1-11-03

So i saved the world, proved im "The one" and made Hugo Weaving explode. Now what? What , no prophetic words , no coaxing, no crazy tactical analysis? They havent written the fucking script for the sequel yet nigga. Whatchu want from me?

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"Life Sucks, Then you Die. The bit inbetween isnt very funny either"

That is the most ignorant fucking thing I've ever read.

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~But now you realize / He's not selling any alibis~

That is the most ignorant fucking thing I've ever read.

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"That is the most ignorant fucking thing I've ever read."-akirajim

I actually took all the courses in the middle panel. I never took Chemistry, however.

CC 164: Tales from my transcript (a true story) by lara7 1-12-03

Professor, I'm having trouble remembering what some of these abbreviations on my transcript mean. Well, it has been over 10 years since you got your BA. What courses are you referring to? "Elem Germ", "Sem Rom Med Ren Civ" and "Mus & Musm Metds" Ah. Those are Elementary German, Seminar in Roman, Medieval and Renaissance Civilization, and Museology and Museum Methods. Okay, fine. Now, explain this one: "Anal. Chem."? Raar.

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.