Dutch Treat by ragu4u 6-02-10

In A Peruvian Morgue.... Not ANOTHER body. What's going on? You haven't seen anthing yet, doctor. And why would you say that? I understand Joran van der Sloot is dating again.

At Home With "Umpire" Jim Joyce by ragu4u 6-03-10

You of all people gotta know; that call I made was a good one. He was safe by a mile. Hmmm... I realize it ruined that pitcher's perfect game but I call em as I see em. You have to agree. It was plain as the nose on your face. C'mon, say something, mom. Look at me, boy. I'm down here. And yer mom's in the kitchen.

ragu4u wrote:

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At Home With "Umpire" Jim Joyce by ragu4u 6-03-10

You of all people gotta know; that call I made was a good one. He was safe by a mile. Hmmm... I realize it ruined that pitcher's perfect game but I call em as I see em. You have to agree. It was plain as the nose on your face. C'mon, say something, mom. Look at me, boy. I'm down here. And yer mom's in the kitchen.

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Duely noted.

Daddy's Lil Girl by ragu4u 6-04-10

Will you give my little girl a couple rides around the valley? I'd like to say yes but... why the gun? Just in case you try to say no. She's THAT bad, huh? Ask her yourself. She gets one 2 minute phone call a week. Oh my, a 3 yr. old on "work release". I hope she doesn't wear spurs!

Better Than A Cold Shower by ragu4u 6-04-10

Why do you want to borrow the car? It isn't running. I just wanna screw my girfriend in the backseat. Well get your mom's bra and panties outta there first. So, you tapped mom's ass in the backseat yourself, huh pops? Actually, I thought you did it. Forget the car. I just went limp.

Torah, Torah, Torah by ragu4u 6-05-10

I'm here with Helen Thomas. Helen, what should the Jews in Israel do? Go home to Germany and Poland, and stop occupying Palestine. The Jews came from Poland? Sure, haven't you seen "Shindler's List?" ..and furthermore... Hey Helen, in all my life my lips NEVER tasted kielbasa!

Solitude by ragu4u 6-05-10

Check! CheckMATE! Playing against myself is nowhere near as fun as playing WITH myself!

The Freshman by ragu4u 6-05-10

I must meet her, but what to say? "Hello", is dumb. So is ,"How are you"? Why do I never know what to say? I'm sure the right words will come to me, tho. Whoa! NICE tits!

500,000 Died For THIS?

Don't you be makin slavery illegal! Then who's gonna flip the country's burgers?

by ragu4u, 6-06-10

Bull-Sheet

Uh uh. Homey don't buy that "Ghost of Christmas Past" bullshit!

by ragu4u, 6-06-10

How Annoying! by ragu4u 6-06-10

Hi ya, pear! Oh no. You're the Annoying Orange from YouTube, right? Maybe I yam and maybe I yam not. heheheh...and, oh yeah...KNIFE!! Stop with the stupid puns and crazy laugh, already; and I'm not falling for that "knife" bit. I wasn't born yesterday, you dweebish fruit. Orange gonna love this. This pear guy be "big time" juicy.

"Two Bros" Heating & Cooling by ragu4u 6-07-10

Our first day open and STILL no calls? Well, we did get one call from a Chinese guy but... But what? I told him to "buzz off". WHY? Well, what would have told a Chinaman who asked for a first class "Bro Job"?

Nice tits! ...erm, I mean, excellent comics.

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Whore House Novice

You the gal I'm supposed to nail?

by ragu4u, 6-07-10

"Back In The High Life Again" by ragu4u 6-08-10

Aruba, Jamaica...ooh I wanna take ya to... Aren't you Joran van der Sloot, killer extraodinaire? Who wants to know, my funky mama? My boss, Greta Van Sustern. And she STILL wants a piece o YOU! Oh this bitch gonna be dying a thousand deaths. I know THAT! Hey wait. STOP! We go "LIVE" right after O'Rielly.

The Bigger They Are... by ragu4u 6-08-10

What happened to you? Well, in 1998 I...I... You what? ...I bit Mark McGuire. Who's he?

Persh-AUR is HELL! by ragu4u 6-09-10

So now you're putting H.I.V. needles into the roadside bombs, huh? "The Art of Tactics" Another course worth every penny from... ...your "University of Feenix".

"Thanks Dad" by ragu4u 6-09-10

Hey, ya little squirt, get offa my sidewalk. My dad says you can't call me names. Your dad? The broken down fireman? I don't sweat him. My daddy ain't bwoken down....much. Father of the Month... Aaaaaaak! This oughta spin your hat around straight, punk!

Top o the World by ragu4u 6-09-10

And why does THIS room cost me $35,000.000 per night? This IS the "Four Seasons New York" penthouse, sir. But 35 grand? C'mon! The percs, sir. Don't forget the percs. Such as? Trained bedbugs, sir. Almost unheard of in this racket.

Yes, but are they THOROUGHBRED trained bed bugs?!

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I will rate you hard, and unendingly.

Just One Smart Remark! by ragu4u 6-09-10

You must be Zeus. And you must be heading south. I don't th.... ...ink so! You called him Zeus, didn't ya?

Give Dad "A Clue" For Father's Day by ragu4u 6-10-10

I wonder what goes on down here in my rumpus room? Hey son, why are the keys on the keyboard all sticky? What do you mean, the two girls knocked over the one cup?

A Word To The Wise by ragu4u 6-10-10

Oh Lord, please don't let me hear it again. What are you; some kinda WISE guy? Oh Zeus, please don't let me hear it again. Well you better WISE up. Oh Budda, please don't let me hea......aw, what the fuck. Hey...I'm talkin to you, WISE guy.

Plan "B"

"FLASH", Nelson Mandella's grand daughter killed in auto crash returning from World Cup event. Screw it, mates. Let's just go see "Invictus".

by ragu4u, 6-11-10