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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

quote:
Thanks. :)

Uh... why is he lying to her?


Because he got his degree at Haverford?
Because they promised to love each other for better or worse, for richer or poorer, today, tomorrow, and for haver?
Because it's pathological behaver?
Because she likes the film To Haver Have Not?
Because she's buying a stairway to havering?
Because her name is Grace, and while driving through Maryland, he saw a sign that read "Havre de Grace"?
Because the songwriter couldn't spell "heifer"?

HTH!

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-04-02 7:38am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

Now I haver headache.

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9-04-02 7:44am (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

You were lying on the wrong side of your head again last night, eh?

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-04-02 7:46am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

No, I heard some Bee Gees earlier tonight, and their high-pitched voices caused the headache. I can't stand falsetto.

(There's always time for a punfest.)

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9-04-02 7:55am (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

I understand. I always found their musical fabric ate at my very eardrums.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-04-02 7:59am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

The two brothers who are The Proclaimers are well-qualified to talk of havering, since they were brough up on a cattle stud. Like all kids, they got stuck with the dirty jobs... if anyone knows bull shit, they do.

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9-04-02 8:29am (new)
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kaufman
Director of Cats

Member Rated:

Later they sold movie-themed snacks, such as chocolate ecLiarLiars, If It's Tuesday, These Must Be Belgian Waffalse, and Terminator 2 Judgement Day shish kebabs.

---
ken.kaufman@gmail.com

9-04-02 8:39am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

If you can't stand falsetto, stay away from Chicago. They're quite noisy this time of year

That didn't work right.

9-04-02 8:43am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

Hey... if I cat is called to testify in court, and refuses to stand, but instead lies... does it commit purrjury?

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9-04-02 9:03am (new)
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KajunFirefly
chooby digital (in stereo)

Member Rated:

"Flower" by Eels
Written by E

Turn the ugly light off God,
Wanna feel the night,
Everyday it shines down on me,
Don't you think that I see?
Don't you think that I see?
What it's all about?
Hard to look the other way,
While the world passes me by,
And everyone is trying to bum me out.

It's a pretty big world God,
And I am awful small,
Every day they rain down on me,
Flower in a hail storm,
Flower in a hail storm,
I'm living for the drought,
I could throw it back at them,
But then I play their game,
Everyone is trying to bum me out.

When I came into this world, they slapped me,
and every day since then I'm slapped again,
Tomorrow's King, an unsightly coward,
You see I know I'm gonna win.

Turn the ugly light off God,
Don't wanna see my face,
Every day it will betray me,
Don't you think that I know,
Don't you think that I know,
What their talking about?
If they step on me tonight, they're gonna pay someday,
Everyone is trying to bum me out.

"Manchild" by Eels
Written by E

Everytime you crave for me,
I'm here,
And anything you hunger for,
I'll share,
And I will be quietly standing by,
While slowly, I am dying, inside.

Hold me in your arms,
and let me be the one,
Who can feel, like I am a child, in love.

Everytime I talk to you,
You're down,
And every time you need a laugh,
I'm around,
And when you forget I'm here,
I'm not,
It isn't really me that you've forgot.

Hold me in your arms,
and let me be the one,
Who can feel, like I am a child, in love.

Whisper now, and tell me how,
You'll watch me and tell me somehow,
I'm gonna be your man.

---
Dad was flammable

9-09-02 11:17am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Bleed American
Jimmy Eat World

i'm not alone because the t.v.'s on
i'm not crazy because i take the right pills every day and rest
clean your conscience
clear your thoughts with speyside
with your grain

salt sweat sugar on the asphalt
our hearts littering the topsoil
tune in
we can get the last call
sign up
it's the picket line or the parade
our lives
our coal

i bled the greed from my arm
won't they give it a rest now?
now?
now?
now?

[hr]
Learn To Fly
Foo Fighters

Run and tell all of the angels
This could take all night
Think I need a devil to help me get things right
Hook me up a new revolution
Cause this one is a lie
We sat around laughing and watched the last one die
I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for a complication
Looking cause I'm tired of lying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly
I think I'm done nursing the patience
I can wait one night
I'd give it all away if you give me one last try
We'll live happily ever trapped if you just save my life
Run and tell the angels that everything is alright
I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for a complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly
Make my way back home when I learn to
Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try and make this life my own
Fly along with me, I can't quite make it alone
Try and make this life my own
I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for a complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to
I'm looking to the sky to save me
Looking for a sign of life
Looking for something to help me burn out bright
I'm looking for a complication
Looking cause I'm tired of trying
Make my way back home when I learn to fly
Make my way back home when I learn to fly
Make my way back home when I learn to, learn to, learn to…
[hr]
I have no idea what this song means but it's cool. It was on the Titan AE, but I've heard some of the rest of the bands work. They worship Oasis, supposedly.

Cosmic Castaway
Electrasy
Lose my head to the chemical freeway
Comin' up on overload
In a mystic new dimension
Purify and sanctify me
What, so I'm in no end game
Move my piece right off the board
Losing sure is easy so I am no more

But I'm not broken, in my dream I win
In here I'm nothing, a Cosmic Castaway

In my head I'm a chemical dreamer
Speed up to burn out mode
Comin' up in the 5th dimension
Beautify don't crucify me, yeah
So I need no mind game poisoning my lonely soul
Losing sure is easy so I am no more

But I'm not broken, in my dream I win
And I take over, coz I'm no loser
And I'm in and you're not, bad dreams don't stop
But I'm all screwed up, a Cosmic Castaway
a Cosmic Castaway, a Cosmic Castaway

And I want but have not
Bad dreams, lust thoughts
In here with no pain, you hurt me again
And I want but have none
I should beat the alien

But here I'm no one, a Cosmic Castaway
a Cosmic Castaway, a Cosmic Castaway
a Cosmic Castaway.

9-09-02 11:52am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

Well, that was one of the least subtle drug-use allusive songs I have ever heard of...

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

9-09-02 7:26pm (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Ah. That was painfully obvious and flew right over my head.

9-10-02 8:31am (new)
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kramer_vs_kramer
Stripcreator Newbie

Member Rated:

Surely this is a Bad Thing?

9-12-02 9:56am (new)
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skagg
Comic Overlord

Member Rated:

well its a stupid move considering how many better religions are out there

---
Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

9-13-02 8:05am (new)
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gabe_billings
President and CEO of Wirthlingsux Inc.

Member Rated:

Boy Named Sue
Johnny Cash
written by Shel Silverstein

My daddy left home when I was three
And he didn't leave much to ma and me
Just this old guitar and an empty bottle of booze.
Now, I don't blame him cause he run and hid
But the meanest thing that he ever did
Was before he left, he went and named me "Sue."

Well, he must o' thought that was quite a joke
And it got a lot of laughs from a' lots of folks,
It seems I had to fight my whole life through.
Some gal would giggle and I'd get red
And some guy'd laugh and I'd bust his head,
I tell ya, life ain't easy for a boy named Sue.

Well, I grew up quick and I grew up mean,
My fist got hard and my wits got keen,
I'd roam from town to town to hide my shame.
But I made a vow to the moon and stars
That I'd search the honky-tonks and bars
And kill that man who gave me that awful name.

Well, it was Gatlinburg in mid-July
And I just hit town and my throat was dry,
I thought I'd stop and have myself a brew.
At an old saloon on a street of mud,
There at a table, dealing stud,
Sat the dirty, mangy dog that named me Sue.

Well, I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
From a worn-out picture that my mother'd had,
And I knew that scar on his cheek and his evil eye.
He was big and bent and gray and old,
And I looked at him and my blood ran cold
And I said: My name is Sue! How do you do?
Now you're gonna die!!

Well, I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he went down, but to my surprise,
He come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear.
But I busted a chair right across his teeth
And we crashed through the wall and into the street
Kicking and a' gouging in the mud and the blood and the beer.

I tell ya, I've fought tougher men
But I really can't remember when,
He kicked like a mule and he bit like a crocodile.
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss,
He went for his gun and I pulled mine first,
He stood there lookin' at me and I saw him smile.

And he said: Son, this world is rough
And if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
And I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along.
So I give ya that name and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
And it's the name that helped to make you strong.

Now you just fought one hell of a fight
And I know you hate me, and you got the right
To kill me now, and I wouldn't blame you if you do.
But ya ought to thank me, before I die,
For the gravel in ya guts and the spit in ya eye
Cause I'm the son-of-a-bitch that named you Sue.

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
And I called him my pa, and he called me his son,
And I came away with a different point of view.
And I think about him, now and then,
Every time I try and every time I win,
And if I ever have a son, I think I'm gonna name him
Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!

---
100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

9-14-02 7:47am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

I Am a Viking
Yngwie Malmsteen

I am a Viking in going out to war
And I've got death upon my mind
As I was leavin' oh yesterday
I've got no fear in my heart

*Chorus*
As the shores of my home disappear
I sail over the sea without fear
Dragon ships are charging through the waves
Just want to sail away into the sea yeah yeah

I am a warrior my mind is set to kill
Life or death is on the line
I am a slayer and you will taste my steel
I've got your life right in my hand

As the shores of my home disappear
I sail over the sea without fear
Dragon ships are charging through the waves
Just want to sail away into the sea yeah yeah

You are a loser and it's such a shame
That you're a fool and you don't know
That in a viking I'll walk all over you
And by my sword you will die

As the shores of my home disappear
I sail over the sea without fear
Dragon ships are charging through the waves
Just want to sail away into the sea yeah yeah
Mmmm

9-17-02 5:45pm (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Another one of teh best songs evar!

I was walking down the High Street
When I heard footsteps behind me
And there was a little old man (Hello)
In scarlet and grey, shuffling away (laughter)
Well he trotted back to my house
And he sat beside the telly (Oaah..)
With his tiny hands on his tummy
Chuckling away, laughing all day (laughter)

Oh, I ought to report you to the Gnome office
(Gnome Office)
Yes
(Hahahahaha)

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you don't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me"
Said the laughing Gnome

Well I gave him roasted toadstools and a glass of dandelion wine (Burp, pardon)
Then I put him on a train to Eastbourne
Carried his bag and gave him a fag
(Haven't you got a light boy?)
"Here, where do you come from?"
(Gnome-man's land, hahihihi)
"Oh, really?"

In the morning when I woke up
He was sitting on the edge of my bed
With his brother whose name was Fred
He'd bought him along to sing me a song

Right, let's hear it
Here, what's that clicking noise?
(That's Fred, he's a "metrognome", haha)

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you don't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me"

(Own up, I'm a gnome, ain't I right, haha)
"Haven't you got an 'ome to go to?"
(No, we're gnomads)
"Didn't they teach you to get your hair cut at school? you look like a rolling gnome."
(No, not at the London School of Ecognomics)

Now they're staying up the chimney
And we're living on caviar and honey (hooray!)
Cause they're earning me lots of money
Writing comedy prose for radio shows
It's the-er (what?)
It's the Gnome service of course

Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you don't catch me"
Ha ha ha, oh, dear me

(Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me"
Ha ha ha, hee hee hee
"I'm a laughing Gnome and you can't catch me")

(One more time, yeah)

9-18-02 11:18am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

Oops, that last one was

The Laughing Gnome
David Bowie

9-18-02 3:09pm (new)
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evil_d
Riding through your town with his head on fire

Member Rated:

I think the lyrics to this one are interesting. Something else that's interesting is that it's written by a man, apparently from a man's point of view, but sung by a woman. She's got a good voice, though -- kind of a Mae West type.

Want it all back
[i]Words: Tim Jensen
Music and arrangement: Yoko Kanno
Vocals: Mai Yamane
Album: [/i]Cowboy Bebop: No Disc (OST 2)

You said you wanted to see Paris
So I took you to the movie
"Bon Amie" or something French like that
And then you said you were embarrassed
Because I never bought you jewelry
Television shopping fixed all that

Funny thing
'Cause I haven't seen you lately
When I called your house
It wasn't you who told me

I heard it all
from your Dad
I used up all my money on you baby
and I want it back

I want it back
I used up all my money tryin' to please ya
Now I want it back

Want it all back
Want it all back

Do you remember late last winter
You said that you had nothin' to wear
Those fake fur pajamas looked real nice

I couldn't take you to Miami
But took you to the ocean and we
Had some blue Hawaii on the beach

Let me think
If I add up all you owe me
And include my time
I might make it through the summer

And I guess that
ain't too bad
I used up all my money on you baby
and I want it back

I want it back
I used up all my money tryin' to please ya
Now I want it back

Want it all back
Said I want it all back
Gimme my money all back
Want my money all back

---------------------------------

This one just seems appropriate to this thread.

Songs Remain
[i]Artist: H2O
Album: Go[/i]

Well those 5 years are gone now
So I got a plan that's new
I'm seeing the future
But I can't forget my roots
'Cause it's still not a concept
Someone made up on TV
It's still something real
Way down deep inside of you and me

[Chorus]
All the bands we love the most
All the songs that gave us hope
Reasons we're still here today
People change but songs remain

Songs remain
Songs remain in our hearts now
No matter what we do
And I know you can feel it
Despite our different views
If we make a connection, we'll have both sides to see
And no one can take that away from you
And no one can take that away from me

[Chorus]

And when you put that music on
You can feel it, you just know it, it's right for you
And even though the times have changed
That spirit, I still feel it, it carries on
And even though your life has changed
That spirit, you still feel it, it carries on
It carries on in every song

[Chorus x3]

Of course, the words alone really don't do justice to the songs... try to find the MP3s or buy the albums.

---
The what mentioned above is total fiction. Please don't take it seriously!

9-23-02 5:37pm (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

The Doug Anthony All Stars used to do this one, but I don't know if they wrote it. I rarely fails to bring tears to my eyes. They were generally a very obscene comedy act, but this serious one just stabs me right through the heart...

Warsong
as performed by The Doug Anthony All Stars

With a downwind blast from his doughy arse,
Like a lance of fire he shot up the mast,
As he mumbled blasphemous epitaphs:

"I am the sailor."

And the captain cried with a mighty heave-ho,
"Enemy sighted on the starboard bow.
"Load your cannons, let 'em go,
"For God is on our side, boys."

In the dust and sand of a foreign land,
Hands afire, he buried his friend.
He beat his brow, and cursing foul he said:

"I am the soldier."

And the private laughed as he reached the bluff,
His gun barrel smoking, "Enough's enough.
"We've done more damage than old Macduff,
"And God is full of pride, boys."

He flew through the flak on the first attack,
A bomb bay opened on a missiles back.
"Here's the payload," he crudely spat:

"I am the airman."

And the General sighed, "This is our last stand,
"Let every man say 'Amen',
"For we'll not see daylight again,
"And tonight we'll meet our God, boys."

Well the airman plunged into the pines,
And the sailor drowned in the briny brine,
And the soldier in haste put his foot on a mine...

And it comes to all in time, boys.
For on the day they died, boys,
God was on the other side, boys.

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

9-25-02 12:58am (new)
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JrnymnNate
I fling the shoddy polo stick

Member Rated:

I think this should have gone here awhile ago...

Overreacting
Brad

When there's no place you feel at home
And you think you'd be better of alone
When you think there's no reason to try
And you hate yourself and wanna die
When your filled with anxiety
and everyone's your enemy
When you wish you were with someone else
and you wanna go out and kill yourself

Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...
Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...

When you get yourself depressed
'cause you think you can't do your best
When you write youself a stupid song
to remind yourself that you're (a god?)

Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...
Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...

(guitar solo)

Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...
Ohhh, ohhh oh, you're overreacting...

9-25-02 10:10am (new)
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DexX
What the Cat Dragged In

Member Rated:

Got Peter Gabriel new album Up today. it is very very good. It's funny, though... after nine tracks of brassy and rude drums and electronica, the last track is a quiet, simple, beautiful thing, little more than voice and piano... a pleasant, gentle shock.

The Drop
by Peter Gabriel
moving down the fuselage
toward the open door
catch you looking down outside
to see what lies ahead

one by one
you watch them fall
fall through cloud
one by one
you watch them fall
no idea where they’re going
but down

where they’ve gone
where they’ve gone

watching as the sun goes down
i sit inside this plane
notice how the city lights
are like the nerves inside the brain

one by one
they’re going out
you watch them dim
one by one
you watch them fall
and wonder where they’re falling to

---
This signature has performed an illegal operation and has been shut down.

9-27-02 12:00am (new)
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pita
La fille qui a joué avec le feu

Member Rated:

I'M MOVIN' ON by I don't know who but I like the song:

I've dealt with my ghosts and I've faced all my demons
Finally content with a past I regret
I've found you find strength in your moments of weakness
For once I'm at peace with myself
I've been burdened with blame
Trapped in the past too long
I'm movin' on...
I've lived in this place and I know all the faces
Each one is different but they're always the same
They mean no harm but it's time that I face it
They'll never allow me to change
But I never dreamed home
would end up where I don't belong
I'm movin' on...
I sold what I could and packed what I couldn't
Stopped to fill up on my way out of town
I've loved like I should but lived like I shouldn't
I had to lose everything to find out
Maybe forgiveness will find me
somewhere down this road
I'm movin' on...

---
“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

9-27-02 8:15pm (new)
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attitudechicka
is never bored.

Member Rated:

quote:
I'M MOVIN' ON by I don't know who but I like the song:

Rascal Flats

---
Mediocrity at its most average.

9-28-02 8:25pm (new)
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