Based on an unproduced film script I wrote in college and to be continued at a later date, I present... Bronson Pinchot, Bruce Willis and Rachel Weisz in: A NAKED MAN IN A CLOTHED BODY.

A Naked Man In A Clothed Body (1) by UnknownEric 7-12-04

Hi there. Hi. I'm naked, you know. What the fuck just happened?

A Naked Man In A Clothed Body (2) by UnknownEric 7-12-04

Hello, ma'am. My name is Wes. Nice to meet you, sonny. By the way, I'm naked. Come back so I can get a better look at that sweet ass!

A Naked Man In A Clothed Body (3) by UnknownEric 7-12-04

At the local newspaper. Boss! Boss! I have tomorrow's front page scoop! There's a fully clothed man going around telling people he's naked! That's the most exciting thing since that circus midget stopped by the local malt shop! We should just kill ourselves. I'll get the pills.

A Naked Man In A Clothed Body (4) by UnknownEric 7-12-04

Kerra, have you heard about the guy who thinks he's naked? Actually, Rob, I was just going to bring him up. Why's that? I'm leaving you for him. You're leaving me for the "naked guy?" I'm not just hurt... I'm publicly humiliated. You think that's bad, just wait till I show everyone those pictures of you...

A Naked Man In A Clothed Body (5) by UnknownEric 7-12-04

Hi, Rob. What can I do for you? I want you to arrest a man on indecent exposure charges. Who? The guy who thinks he's naked but isn't? There isn't a law against that... Can you make one?

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I has a flavor!

I was Stately Wayne Manor's penpal for a couple of years. He used to write articles for various magazines (mostly about wrestling, movies, popular culture, humor, etc.) and also had some stories printed in Weekly World News in which he portrayed himself as "The World's Most Conceited Man." Anyway, I had a letter about Edward D. Wood, Jr. printed in "Fangoria" once, and he wrote to me about it, and we corresponded for a couple of years.

Oh yeah, I liked the "False Naked Claim" Guy.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I loved the third one the best. Good show, mate.

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The giant three-phallused phallus of Uzbekistan will one day squirt the cosmic jizz of revenge all over Canada.