[b]World's Worst Personal Advice

Make a comic about the worst possible advice you might give to someone in a tough situation. [/b]

Examples:
1. Someone forgot his wife's birthday.
2. Someone farted in his/her boss's office.
3. While drunk, someone vomited on his/her cute crush.
4. Someone broke up with a long-term significant other.
5. Someone failed a big exam.
6. Someone sniffs crack as a hobby.
etc.

The rules:
1. Single panels, strips and series are permitted.
2. I find in-jokes, Asian girl 'sucky sucky' jokes, and butt porn unfunny. Post at your own discretion (or lack thereof).
3. Bonus points will be awarded for correct usage of the English language, unless you are typing on a non-Qwerty keyboard; then your confusion is understandable.
4. Judging in about one week or so.

Happy stripping,
-Q

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If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

WW32: Advice so bad it's gay by fpd 12-05-04

I just met the cutest girl, but she doesn't seem interested in me. What should I do? You should have gay sex with me. How is that going to help? Wouldn't that be entirely counter-productive? Not at all. When she thinks you're gay, she'll try her hardest to convert you. Couldn't I just borrow some fashion tips from the queer eye guys and act like I'm gay? No, no. She would spot your phoniness. For this con to work, you have to go all the way.

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

WW 32: Mistakes That Ruined Us All by BigFrank105 12-06-04

I hate America so much! Ach! It brings me much displeasure! Please Abdul, do something to ease your troubles. Why don't you learn to fly airplane instead? Say George, why don't you enter politics like your dad? Thats a good idea, Mr. Magical Monkey! Come on Fossey! We need something to put Nokia back in the black! Well, how about this "N-Gage" idea that Marketing came up with...?

Ambition by Scyess 12-06-04

*bleep!* *ching* *squirp* *squirp* yatta!!! My God... I just realized that I've spent 142 of the last 168 hours playing a video game from 1986. What are you doing?! You can't stop now! You're about to level up! Are you crazy, man??!? *ching* *ching* *bleep!* yatta!!!

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"Old" is the old new.

WW 32: The Bad-Advice Fairy by biped 12-06-04

Swallow the coyote in one gulp.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

WW- Is it really? by xxausrottenxx 12-08-04

in my dorm room just make a comic about butt porn jokes

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xx( o Y o. )xx

WW32: Such professionalism. by SpideyChris 12-09-04

911, this is Sharon. How can I help you? Ohthankgod! Listen, I wasn't watching my baby, and she got in the medicine cabinet, and she took all these pills and now she's having a seizure! Hrm... Crap. I don't think I've had my break burrito yet... She bit off her tongue! Right off! The dog ran under the couch with it! What should I do? Yeeeeaaaah... Force some bleach or something down her throat. The chemicals'll neutralize each other out. I have Mr. Clean! Mr. Clean has bleach, right?

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Use your weapons, they are designed to inflict damage!

The next WW should be "WW things to say when your kids ask if theres a Santa Claus" or something like that

World's Worst Advice :: WW32 by jerico2day 12-10-04

So uh... I fell on this nail thing... and uh, hey, why'd you give me this hammer? Well if ya pull it out, you're gonna bleed to death. So, pound it in. **Can't... Resist....** Do it do it! Ya know you want to! Sucky sucky! Damnit, I think I lost the compo to because of the previous panel! You know what you have to do.

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~J2D~

Judging tomorrow evening, so get those last-minute entries in!

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If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

And now the results which you have waited so patiently for. But first, a la Academy Awards, let's celebrate fifty years of funny mustaches in this short film retrospective!

...

Most of the comics were pretty good and I had a tough time picking the winner.

Third place goes to Scyess, for the entry

Ambition by Scyess 12-06-04

*bleep!* *ching* *squirp* *squirp* yatta!!! My God... I just realized that I've spent 142 of the last 168 hours playing a video game from 1986. What are you doing?! You can't stop now! You're about to level up! Are you crazy, man??!? *ching* *ching* *bleep!* yatta!!!

Second place goes to SpideyChris, for the entry

WW32: Such professionalism. by SpideyChris 12-09-04

911, this is Sharon. How can I help you? Ohthankgod! Listen, I wasn't watching my baby, and she got in the medicine cabinet, and she took all these pills and now she's having a seizure! Hrm... Crap. I don't think I've had my break burrito yet... She bit off her tongue! Right off! The dog ran under the couch with it! What should I do? Yeeeeaaaah... Force some bleach or something down her throat. The chemicals'll neutralize each other out. I have Mr. Clean! Mr. Clean has bleach, right?

First place , and the honour of running the next World's Worst competition goes to fpd, for the entry

WW32: Advice so bad it's gay by fpd 12-05-04

I just met the cutest girl, but she doesn't seem interested in me. What should I do? You should have gay sex with me. How is that going to help? Wouldn't that be entirely counter-productive? Not at all. When she thinks you're gay, she'll try her hardest to convert you. Couldn't I just borrow some fashion tips from the queer eye guys and act like I'm gay? No, no. She would spot your phoniness. For this con to work, you have to go all the way.

Thanks to all who participated! I'll see you all around the universe.

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If you can't beat your computer at chess, try kickboxing.

I have to wait for the muse, but I expect to start a new contest by tomorrow.

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.