The Return Of The Dysfunctional Dillards 1 by biped 6-12-05

Hey, Mom! I just MURDERED ALFRED HITCHCOCK! Alfred Hitchcock's ALREADY DEAD, you fuckin' LIAR! Oh well, he LOOKED like fucking Alfred Hitchcock... anyway, what the fuck's for SUPPER? CAT TURDS, ya fucking little TWERP! MOMMY'S NOT KIDDING -- WAAAAA-HAAA-HAAAA!!! THE CAT TURDS TASTED HORRIBLE AND SHE MADE ME EAT -- SHUT THE FUCK UP, Sis!!!

The Return Of The Dysfunctional Dillards 2 by biped 6-12-05

I'll fuckin' KILL Bobby for tellin' me to SHUT UP! Where's that butcher knife -- MOM! SALLY'S PLOTTING TO KILL ME! Well, SOMEBODY oughtta, ya little SHIT! FUCK YOU!!! AND COOK ME SOME FUCKING DINNER!!! WHATSAMATTER -- CAT TURDS AIN'T GOOD ENOUGH FOR YA, MISTER ROCKEFELLER? "Cat turds" for supper -- AGAIN? Go take your pills, ya fucking retard!

The Return Of The Dysfunctional Dillards 3 by biped 6-12-05

Sure was nice of Dad to take us out to eat! Almost makes me sorta LIKE the fucking BASTARD! But I'm already full of CAT TURDS!!! WAAAAA-HAAAA-HAAAAA!!! Wha -- where am I? What the fuck happened -- YOU HAD ONE OF YOUR SPELLS, YA FUCKIN' DITZ! NOW SHUT UP AND EAT YOUR FUCKIN' OYSTER PUFFS! "OYSTER PUFFS"? But they're made outta leftover membranes, and -- They're CHEAP! You want something that TASTES GOOD, YOU pay for it, DICKHEAD!!!

The Return Of The Dysfunctional Dillards 4 by biped 6-12-05

BLEEEEECHHHH!!! Oh man, I'm throwing my fucking GUTS up! FUCK DAD, that fucking shit-for-brains COCKSUCKER! SHUT UP, I'M THROWIN' UP OYSTER PUFFS AND CAT TURDS, FUCKFACE!!! BLEEEEECCCCHHH!!! Well FUCK, let's have SEX, you fucking SKANK-ASS WHORE! I AIN'T DRUNK ENOUGH YET, YOU SHIT-EATIN' FAG-ASS FUCKIN' DWARF! Next morning... EAT YOUR FUCKIN' "HITLER'S RUNNY-ASS SHIT" FLAKES, SHITHEAD! FUCK YOU, MOMMY, I HATE YOU! WAAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA-HAAAAAAA!!!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

BRILLIANT!!!