Slightly Exaggerated by The_young_scot 5-31-06

The Past Hey mum, I just got my HND in, so thats me accepted to university now! Thats nice son, have you done those dishes yet? Those dishes won't do themself's you know. The Present Hey, wanna hear me play the bass line I've been trying to learn for 3 months?  No  The Future? It would appear that I have suddenly burst into flame Hey look! Football!

Why I Don't Like Watching Football With my Dad by The_young_scot 5-31-06

This happens EVERYTIME God look at that, the stadiums half empty! It's pathetic! And I don't like the way the grass is cut either! This game is rubbish! The ref is rubbish! The commentators are rubbish! Can I change the channel?  No

Degrees of pain by The_young_scot 6-24-06

Hey mum! My exam results came in, I passed! I've got a degree! Thats nice. Get a job. Well done son, you're allowed a beer tonight! I'm 20 Hey sis! My exam results came in, I passed! I've got a degree! ................ Did you just grunt at me?

Upchucking by The_young_scot 7-03-06

*huurrrrkk* Jamie, are you being sick? No, I just wanted to air out the contents of my stomach *huurrrrkk* Do you want me to get the basin Oh god! What the fuck is that?!? Is that moving?!? *huurrrrkk* I'll go get the basin

Upchucking 2: Upchuck With a Vengance by The_young_scot 7-03-06

Apparently I'm half dragon, with the ability to vomit PURE LIQUID FIRE *huurrrrkk* Oh fuck, I'm not sure what that was, but I'm pretty sure I need it to live Dad? Are you there? I'd hate to think my wit was going to wa-*huurrrkk* Gah! WHY IS MY VOMIT BLACK?!

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

I found these most amusing.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

i vomit a lot.

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Kill Whitey.