FTC templete

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work.

by boloboffin, 10-01-06

There's the first panel. Give us a second or even a third.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

ftc by dcomposed 10-01-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. Your giant penis, however, is working marvelously.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

My Comical Romance by RedfeatheR 10-01-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. Can we just sexfuck then? What does "sexfuck" mean? Well... I'd describe it as when you-- Yes

FTC95: Star-Crossed by fpd 10-02-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. I thought that anal probe meant something. No one has ever been so intimate with me before. Your perception, not mine. How can you treat me like this? Are you just the probe 'em and leave 'em type? Why on Zeta do I always get stuck probing the crazies?

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FPD is the foremost plague on discussion boards. Do your part to stomp out FPD.

Lady and the Framp by fundemented 10-03-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. But... I bought you a puppy! I took you to the nicest restaurant in the galaxy! I even sang you Peter Frampton! That was Framp? Ye- FUCK MY ASS

FTC 95: See You Next Wednesday by biped 10-05-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. (*sigh*) This wonderful old classic film is so romantic. It just makes me want to go right out and fuck a horse. Guess what? The theater manager anticipated that reaction, so he's pimpin' horse whores in the lobby! See a great movie--fuck a horse. It's just like those hazy old golden days of the cinema. Yeah--except back then, you got to fuck Mickey Rooney and Buddy Hackett in the ass!

FTC 95: The Poor Lovesick Oaf by biped 10-05-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. You don't like the flowers? Then h-how about this? It's...it's your mom's head. Freshly decapitated, and decorated with-- Oh, for Pete's sake. First daisies, now this--I've never seen such clumsy and ill-conceived courting. (*sniff*) I guess maybe I should tell the little aliens in advance that I'll kill them if they don't love me.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

hisashiburi

FTC 95: Attemptation by Scyess 10-05-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. Your pathetic attempts at violence will never work, either. How about crossdressing? I'm sorry. I won't tell you what happens in the season finale of Lost.

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"Old" is the old new.

Dear God, has it already almost been a week?

Get 'em in - judging tommorrow evening...

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Ftc: nine-five - Stroke twice for love by wankered 10-08-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. For you have taught me alot of how your species express their love. Who needs romance when I can have a satisfying wank.

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Signature? Why, havn't we all made the move to chip & PIN!?

FTC 95: See You Next Wednesday by biped 10-05-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. (*sigh*) This wonderful old classic film is so romantic. It just makes me want to go right out and fuck a horse. Guess what? The theater manager anticipated that reaction, so he's pimpin' horse whores in the lobby! See a great movie--fuck a horse. It's just like those hazy old golden days of the cinema. Yeah--except back then, you got to fuck Mickey Rooney and Buddy Hackett in the ass!

The winning comic: biped!!!!!!!

FTC 95: The Poor Lovesick Oaf by biped 10-05-06

Your pathetic attempts at romance will never work. You don't like the flowers? Then h-how about this? It's...it's your mom's head. Freshly decapitated, and decorated with-- Oh, for Pete's sake. First daisies, now this--I've never seen such clumsy and ill-conceived courting. (*sniff*) I guess maybe I should tell the little aliens in advance that I'll kill them if they don't love me.

The runner up!

Thanks for the entries, creators.

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You can take the heart out of the hooker but you can't take the hooker out of the heart. -- Frankenhooker

Awesome! Thanks.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I think something along the lines of "thanks for all the great entries" is typically a better ego stroke, but if you don't feel it you don't feel it. I can certainly appreciate your honesty!