Yes, you are a "random fathead."  That means that you must hit the "random" button and make a one-panel comic from the first panel of the first comic that randomly appears.  Same background, same characters, your dialogue.  No cheating and clicking "random" until you find a comic that suits you, or making one up and pretending you came upon it randomly.  Sure, no one will know, but the guilt of doing something so heinous, so soul-destroyingly vile, will eat away at you for the rest of your life, leaving you only a shell of your former self, which nobody can deny.

This, plus the fact that you are a fathead, makes you a "random fathead" for the purposes of this contest.  Have fun!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

I hit the random button

The real Highway to Hell isn't nearly as fun as the song.

by HCRoyall, 3-26-07

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

I hit the random button

Ralph never believed us about the man-eating prairie chicken. Poor Ralph.

by HCRoyall, 3-26-07

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

I hit the random button

Dog-On-Ball's secret home life. Now for a brandy and a relaxing sit with the paper. I do hope my stocks are doing well.

by HCRoyall, 3-26-07

I hit the random button

"Just act cool," I told myself. "He'll never suspect a fireman would commit arson."

by HCRoyall, 3-26-07

I hit the random button

"This ain't no town for a cowboy no more," he said, and walked off into the sunset. Two weeks later the Feds nabbed him in Scranton on drug trafficking and murder charges.

by HCRoyall, 3-26-07

I have this contest in the bag.

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

That cowboy one was awesome.

Random Fathead

Frank's attempt at replacing casual Friday with enema Tuesday didn't go over so well ...and that's why I'm announcing mandatory enemas for all empl- JESUS CHRIST I GOTTA SHIT!

by gabe_billings, 3-26-07

Random Fathead

Cleetus is not impressed with avant garde modern art Well fuck, I could shit on a canvas and smear it around with my cat, too. BUT I DON'T, 'CAUSE MY MOMMA RAISED ME RIGHT!

by gabe_billings, 3-26-07

Random Fathead

So you've traveled far to ask a question of the Goat of the Forest. What troubles you, child? How do I get rid of that not-so-fresh-feeling?

by gabe_billings, 3-26-07

Random Fathead

HOLY SHIT! IT'S A TORNADO! IT JUST RIPPED THE BUS APART AND MY BENCH IN HALF! Eh, we can buff that shit out.

by gabe_billings, 3-26-07

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100 pounds of shit in a 25 pound sack.

OPC 34: No registration required

OK. We'll both go three paces forward, and then I will count to three. I don't know. A duel without guns just doesn't feel right.

by lukket, 3-26-07

OPC 34: Bothering Heights

./ Heathcliff, it's me, your Cathy, I've come home. I´m so cold, '/ Ah. That's why they called it a bush.

by lukket, 3-26-07

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troelsea at gmail dot com

Random: ...What the?

Shaggy's brother Edward had his own carrtoon about sleuthing, but it was canned 3 minutes after it premeired. Gee, Mr. Dangerfinger. I hope we don't find any ghost pirates here in Ann Arbor. You know what? This blows... and that's coming from your own drug trip.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random: Corporate Downsizing

The office just wasn't the same without Frakenberry.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random: The Tragic Life of Anusless Eddy

Look, I'm sorry. Its not my fault that I was born without an anus. This worse day of Tobor's life.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random: Pull out before Iraq gets Pregnate.

Troop numbers have gotten so low, the army was forced to hire chickens and the mentally handicap. BaCAWK! Bib bib bubber bib bubber bibby boob boob bom boom.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random: AsianGirl2 is still in Asia.

There was something ... strange about the way Asiangirl1 sold booze. Sake Sake, Five Dolla!

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

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Shame on Us for All We Have Done. May God Have Mercy on Our Dirty Little Hearts.

OPC 34: 2 2 +

Honey, I'm home! Say isn't that guy that just visited you the one we saw yesterday in America's Most Wanted? Honey!? I'm just on my way out. Don't mind me.

by lukket, 3-27-07

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troelsea at gmail dot com

Random: Reading Fine Print.

Due to a loophole, drinking and driving is still illegal, but pulling over first isn't.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random: Paperwork Planet.

Rather than fire procrastonators, the people of Beelbla 7 take a different approach... I told you, I'll have this all done by Sunday.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

Random Vidreo Games.

After Courtney Love obtained the rights to Pong, video gaming was never the same.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

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Shame on Us for All We Have Done. May God Have Mercy on Our Dirty Little Hearts.

random comic 1

Pointing and laughing, the bee informed Gabe of the folly in coming to the red light district prior to developing pubes. Birds and bees sure knew a lot about sex, but why did they have to be so blunt?

by chopper, 3-29-07

random comic 2

Nobody had told Maura that Canada sucked this much...

by chopper, 3-29-07

random comic 3

Hey kid, I just killed the second coming of Christ. IM TELLING DAD!

by chopper, 3-29-07

random comic 4

JESUS CHRIST MAN WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR ROOM? New Carpet.

by chopper, 3-29-07

random comic 5

the laughing factory was subsequently repainted in yellow, the color of hate.

by chopper, 3-29-07

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I dont Know Karate But I sure Know Ka-razy

RCL - OPC 34

Never a fan of fairy tales, Death had waited a long time for this day... Now where is that pedophile-ass wolf at?

by crackpanther, 3-29-07

I hit the random button

Santa had a sweet deal going until Twinkle blew the cover on his cocaine smuggling operation.

by HCRoyall, 3-29-07

I hit the random button

He just walked out the door, never to bee seen again, and all because I asked if he wanted his salad tossed.

by HCRoyall, 3-29-07

I hit the random button

To be fair, the eighteen-car pileup in the middle of suburbia was pretty amazing, but I was a snowman living with a piece of bacon...

by HCRoyall, 3-29-07

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It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

OPC - contest

First day of class at Stripcreator Mutant Academy - I can teleport. Lewlawzl!

by crackpanther, 3-29-07

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Our liability coverage is zero. Our balls however are enormous.

i hit random 2

Coming soon to Fox! When Pants Become Toilets! Oh god. Fucking Indian food.

by finn34, 3-31-07

i hit random 3

Next on Frontline : To Catch A Chicken Predator I'm going to go change my shirt! When you get back, I'm going to fuck the shit of you.

by finn34, 3-31-07

i hit random 4

Next on MTV's Cribs : Ton Loc's Hotel Room! I got the bed over there. That's for doin' the Wild Thing, y'knowwha'msayin?

by finn34, 3-31-07

i hit random 5

Coming soon on Fox! When Celebrities Take Dumps 4 : Scarlett Johannson's Private Tapes Fucking Indian food.

by finn34, 3-31-07

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Our liability coverage is zero. Our balls however are enormous.

Judge this soon I will.  Submit last-minute entries you should.

Begun, the "random fathead" wars have.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Random: Rand's Dumb.

This comic could be anything. It could be a joke about penises. It could be a joke about old men. It could even be commentary on our current sociio-political environment. ... Too bad we're out of sp

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

Random: Yes, there's a typo. Get used to it.

Creating a bin for overnight deliveries is the best idea this hospitlal's ever come up with.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

Random: Jesus saves (insert pun here).

Polite Farting Technique Number 464: Pretend you have to go in your friend's pantry for deep musing.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

Random: DOM.

We now return to Getting Nailed on the Afterschool Special Hour. C'mon, Tommy... Everybody's doing it. Don't be such a chicken!

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

Random: Random(e)

Excuse me. Which way is the beach? That wa--OH MY GOD ITS A FUCKING ALIEN!!!

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

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Shame on Us for All We Have Done. May God Have Mercy on Our Dirty Little Hearts.

Random: I made this one on Coke!

I don't think this is what your friend meant by saying "you need to nail a fat ass." Just close your eyes and think happy thoughts, Ernie.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

Random: Why do I keep on bring politics into this? Cuz.

The only way the political situation in the white house could go from worse to even more worse. OH SWEET JESUS, MY FUCKING BODY IS IN HALF! KARL ROVE STRIKES AGAIN!

by 80_Million_Fleas, 4-02-07

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Shame on Us for All We Have Done. May God Have Mercy on Our Dirty Little Hearts.

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The following statement its true. The previous statement is false

Lots of wonderful entries this time.  I mean lots.  Reading them, I was so obviously enjoying myself that Mr. Ed asked, "Whaaaat's up, Wilbur?" and I shot him in the face.  I ain't Wilbur, fuckhead.

If I don't mention your comic, that doesn't mean it wasn't good.  It doesn't even mean it wasn't as good as the ones I mention.  It just means that I started picking some of the ones I liked best and then kept finding more that I liked and replacing the ones I'd already picked, and I just eventually got tired of doing that and went with the ones that were there at the point that I got tired of doing it.

I liked this one:

Random Vidreo Games.

After Courtney Love obtained the rights to Pong, video gaming was never the same.

by 80_Million_Fleas, 3-27-07

This was amusing:

random comic 2

Nobody had told Maura that Canada sucked this much...

by chopper, 3-29-07

And this one:

I hit the random button

To be fair, the eighteen-car pileup in the middle of suburbia was pretty amazing, but I was a snowman living with a piece of bacon...

by HCRoyall, 3-29-07

But this one made me laugh out loud for some reason, and thus is the winner:

random comic 5

the laughing factory was subsequently repainted in yellow, the color of hate.

by chopper, 3-29-07

Congratulations, Chopper! 

It was a wonderful contest and all of your comics have enriched my life immensely.  Suddenly, the air smells a little sweeter.  Colors are brighter.  Taking a shit seems more cathartic.  And when I accidentally ripped out my big toenail a few minutes ago, I thought, "Ahhhh...that feels good."  If I got hit by a train right now, it would be okay, because I got to experience this contest first.  Of course, I would think, "Why is there a train in my house?"  But it wouldn't matter.  Nothing would matter.  Except my phantom Smurf collection.  It's like when people lose a limb but claim they can still feel it, and it's called "phantom" something.  I lost my Smurf collection, and--oh, who am trying to kid?  I never had any fucking Smurf collection.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Oh Snap I actually won something?

Ok, hrrmmm.

Id like to thank God and Kramer for making this victory possible.

Massive respect to the other contestants, I honestly think some of you had me beat, especially the "sake sake" girl had me dying...

Also an honourable mention to my man the cowboy in lockup, stay strong brotherman.

Now If you kindly direct me towards the free drinks and my award...

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I dont Know Karate But I sure Know Ka-razy