Captain Chip Comes (Back) Again 1 by biped 5-06-07

Well, it's all set--we just got Kristy Taters to be the female lead in your new comeback movie. KRISTY TATERS? Nnngghh...excuse me while I go...MMMFFFF... "relieve" myself... Is this...uh...going to be a problem during filming, Captain Chip? Nnnnffff...NO! I can...handle it...I can... UNNNGGGGHHHH!!! I'm ready for the next scene. Where's Captain Chip? He's in his trailer, uh...getting into character.

Captain Chip Comes (Back) Again 2 by biped 5-06-07

Oh, Captain Chip! Thank you for saving me from the evil Doctor-- CUT! Excuse me, Kristy--something suddenly came up. Back in a jiff! Look, the studio is thinking of replacing you with The Rock and turning this into a "Die Hard" clone. Ngggfff...NO!!! I can "die harder" than that limp noodle! I just need a second to...to... UNNNNGGGHH!!! Oh, Captain Chip, thank you for--OH MY GOD!!! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!? I CAN'T HELP IT!!! MY TESTICLES CONSTANTLY GENERATE FREAKISH QUANTITIES OF SEMEN, AND --UNNNNNGGGGH!!!

Captain Chip Comes (Back) Again 3 by biped 5-06-07

What do you mean, I'm "off the picture"? We're getting someone with a less urgent sexual drive, Captain Chip. Like Ron Jeremy. "I think I'm wearing too many clothes, tee-hee! I'd better start taking them off!" Bump-BUMPA-bump... Oh, Kristy! We could've been co-stars in the greatest love story ever told! Nfff... NNNNFFFFFF... Oh, Biff "Two-Bags" McGurk! Thank you for saving me from the evil Doctor-- CUT! Sorry, Kristy--I have to go empty my colostomy bags. My bowels just moved.

Captain Chip Comes (Back) Again 4 by biped 5-06-07

Well, at least you don't have a raging boner during every fucking scene. Ha-ha...those discarded outtakes with Captain Chip were funny. Have you thought about putting them on the Internet? "I CAN'T HELP IT!!! MY TESTICLES CONSTANTLY GENERATE FREAKISH QUANTITIES OF SEMEN, AND -- --UNNNNNGGGGH!!!" WHAT THE FUCK?!? Well, your lawsuit was successful, Captain Chip. You're back on the picture. Not only that, but my "Whacky Outtakes" DVD is selling like hotcakes!

Captain Chip Comes (Back) Again 5 by biped 5-06-07

However, I'm afraid we've had to let Kristy go. Captain Chip, meet your new co-star. Will this be one of those new "talking pictures"? MY GOD, Captain Chip--she's 98 FUCKING YEARS OLD! SHE HAS A SEXY SMILE!!! AND...THOSE LEGS!!! YOU'RE A MAN-- SURELY YOU--NNNFFF... NNNNFFFFFF... UNNNNNGGGHHH!!! I'm confused... we're getting what, now? Just say "I do" when I wiggle my pinky, Eunice!

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Hooray for Captain Chip!

---
It was such a waste of everyone’s time and money that even the Tokyo stadium’s rape robots apologized– something they were programmed specifically never to do.

biped, you are a genius. Now excuse me while I go... relieve myself.

---
I has a flavor!

brilliant! i demand more! MORE!

---
Kill Whitey.

Your wonderful comments are so gratifying that I...err...excuse me.

BTW,  here are the rest of Captain Chip's adventures if anyone would like to see them.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?!  FINISH THE FUCKING STORY!!

---
Ham-fisted ham fisting.

Fantastic comics.

   

---
The dictator of love and his weapon of mass destruction

ArtemisStrong

They live happily ever after!

HotRodDeathToll

Thanks, yaaaaay!

 

 

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Apologies in advance, but after much careful consideration and extensive soul-searching, I have decided to bump this "Captain Chip" thread.

---
Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.