Here are some comic strips I made using the "Stripcreator" program or application or whatever it's called. 

Mr. Nightmare by biped 7-02-09

Ha ha! You still listen to CDs! Don't you even HAVE an iPod? Sh-sh-shut up...SH-SH-SHUT UP... HA HA HA HA!!! STUTTERING STANLEY!!! STUTTERING STANLEY!!! HAAAAAA HA HA!!! SHUT UP, YOU FREAK!!! Cole...do you want the Pop Tart? NO! I want IPODS!

Various People Express Their Regrets About Michael Jackson by biped 6-29-09

My main regret is that Michael will never get to see the next "Transformers" movie. My main regret is that Michael never got a chance to be the guest killer on "Matlock." My main regret is that Michael never got to see how many licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop. My main regret is that Michael never got to have a fun sleepover with Madonna's new children. My main regret is that Michael never got to be "Michael Jackstone" on "The Flintstones." My main regret is that Rip Torn wouldn't let Michael be Agent M in "Men in Black II."

CC428: Stool Time by biped 6-24-09

Hmm, it sez here: "Shit always rolls downhill." Wow! It really does! YAAAAAAAA!!! That was the worst picnic EVER! I'm still combing SHIT out of my hair!

CC428: Just the Factoids, Ma'am by biped 6-15-09

Wow, listen to what it says here in "Fun Factoids"! It says: "The actual names of the famous 'three wise monkeys' are--" I hate "factoids" and I think that anyone who finds them interesting is a cock...sucking... fuckhead. "--Mizaru (See no evil), Mikazaru (Hear no evil), and Mazaru (Speak no evil)." Jeepers, I didn't know that! Fuckhead. Later, at Granny's house... --Mitsubishi, M-Mr. Miyagi, and...uhh... Fuckhead. Well, I'll be hornswoggled!

Doggy Mega-Bites by biped 5-26-09

OMIGOD!!! IT'S DOGGY MEGA-BITES, THE DOG WHO BITES EVERYBODY!!! Mom!!! Doggy Mega-Bites BIT me!!! Well, of course he did, sweetie. Doggy Mega-Bites bites everybody. Doggy Mega-Bites has never bited me. He will, Sis...he will.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Meatloaf Moose by biped 5-20-09

Mmm-mmm...I sure wouldn't mind having some delicious meatloaf for dinner tonight. HELP US, MEATLOAF MOOSE!!! Couldn't you just make some?

Reign Man by biped 4-27-09

Better to REIGN IN HELL than to serve in Heaven! Right, motherfucker? HAW HAW HAW! (GASP!) Later... Well, here I am! When does my reign begin? Err...excuse me? Well, I only got assraped 10,000 times today, so I can't complain. How's about you? It's my birthday, so I get to drink a million gallons of diseased dog piss! Mmm-boy!

Half-Bakey Flakey by biped 4-09-09

Hi, I'm "Flakey" Nakerson. I'm always all-the-way naked underneath my clothes (tee hee) PFFFT! So the fuck what? Everybody's naked under their fucken clothes... DUMBASS!!! Mommy...M-Mommy... (sob) you... you said I was "special"... y-you said... It is time for you to take that spiritual journey into the wilderness now. Goodbye, Flakey.

CC423: Captain Chip in: "Fappy Easter" by biped 4-08-09

This is a very special Easter, because we have--a very special surprise guest! Hi, everybody! And now I'll tell you all about the time I defeated the League of Villainy! One day, I was-- Err...aren't you going to...you know..."wank" it for us, uhh, Captain Wanker? I--huh? But I thought...I was under the impression that... that...I...uhh... (SOB) OH, MY GOD!!! THIS IS HORRIBLE!!! NNNFFF... NNNNNFFFF... UUUNNNGGHHH!!! GO, YOU MAGNIFICENT BASTARD, GO!!!

The Unreported Scan by biped 4-04-09

Captain, I've finished my preliminary scan of the planet and found it to be extremely rich in-- Let me guess, Spock. "Dogshit." You have found the planet to be extremely rich in dogshit. This is most distressing. Every time I attempt to make a report to the captain lately, he finishes my sentences with the word "dogshit." Oh, I told him to do that. As ship's clown, I felt it would relieve much of the pent-up tension around here. "Ship's clown", indeed. I must say without reservation that I am entirely-- Let me guess, Spock. "Dogshit." You are entirely dogshit.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

CC423: Easter 2.0 by biped 4-08-09

Wow! The Easter Bunny's here, and it's--RON JEREMY?!?!? Hiya, Billy. Where's your mom? What...who...(GASP)... UNNH... UNNNHH... UNNNNGGGHHH!!! Hey, where's my fuckin' eggs?!? Did the Easter Bunny come yet, Billy? Yeah...all over Mom's ass.

Awwwwww... by biped 3-31-09

Sorry Arnold, but they only gave Mr. Drummond two free tickets to the circus, and he's taking me. What'choo talkin' bout, Willis? (sigh) The penguin just isn't working out. I'm afraid we're going to have to concede to Gary Coleman's contract demands. NO!!! What the show needs is MORE penguins--not LESS!!! --so we're not going to the circus at all, Arnold. We're all going to... Disneyland. WOW! Thanks, Mr. Drummond. I mean...Dad.

The Bleeps of Creepy Greep by biped 3-31-09

Now listen, Creepy Greep...this is going to be a live network broadcast, so please...please refrain from excessive profanity. SHITFUCKPISS!!! FUCK!!! SHIT!!! TITS!!! ASS!!! MOTHERFUCKER!!! (sigh) I tried reasoning with him, but it was no use. Better keep your finger right on that ten-second delay button. Yes, sir. [BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP][BLEEP] Well, that's your [BLEEP] opinion.

The Incident by biped 3-29-09

Billy, I think we should do something nice for our new neighbor so she'll feel welcome to the neighborhood. Hi. Would you like for me to mow your lawn? GASP!!! SEXUAL HARRASSMENT!!! HELP!!! POLICE!!! No, he didn't actually touch me. It was more of an emotional rape. Whew. I can sure relate to that.

Sally's Dance Fever by biped 3-23-09

I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! Wha--why are you saying that silly thing over and over, sweetie? I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! Sally, please... you've been saying that ALL DAY. Now, just pipe down and go to bed, dear... I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! I GOT ANTS IN MY PANTS, SO I BREAKDANCE!!! SHUT UP!!! SHUUUUUT UUUUUUUUP!!!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

Oh, Butt Up, Luca by biped 3-20-09

Don Corleone... I am honored and grateful...dat you have invited me...to your daughter's-- Oh, butt up, Luca. Just butt up. Don Corleone...I'm gonna butt up now, because I know dat you are busy.

Why Family Circus Is Only One Panel: 11/26/87 by biped 3-19-09

I wish we could have GRUEL for breakfast. Oliver Twist even wanted seconds. Just as I thought--the little bastard's been into our fucking weed again.

Biff McGurk's Greatest Adventure by biped 3-08-09

BIFF!!! THE WORLD IS ABOUT TO BE DESTROYED AND ONLY YOU CAN SAVE US!!! Oh, my god! Tell me what I have to do. Later... Whew! Thank you, Biff. You saved the entire world. You're welcome.

CC419 - Bad thing, Worse thing. by biped 3-06-09

Bad thing... (groan)... I'm experiencing shortness of breath, and...and chest p-pains... Oh, my god, Dave. This could be serious. I'll drive you to the emergency room right away. Worse thing... (groan)... I'm-- FOOD FIGHT!!!!!

Sally in TV Land 3 by biped 2-19-09

"...and in other news, today the whole world is laughing at the new superhero with the appallingly unfortunate name of 'Shit Man.'" Ha, ha! Why does he call himself "Shit Man", Katie? "Well, Sally...it's because he's from an alien planet where the word 'shit' means 'selfless valor.' But now...he's just up 'shit creek.'" Ha, ha! Oops, I have to go pee-pee. Be right back, Katie. "Okay, Sally. I'll hold off on the rest of that story until you get back. Meanwhile, here's Al with the extended weather forecast." SALLY! ASK AL IF DADDY WILL BE ABLE TO PLAY GOLF THIS AFTERNOON!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

The Pomposity of Porky Meatloaf by biped 2-12-09

Hello. I'm Porky Meatloaf. And I am vastly, almost inconceivably superior to each and every one of you lesser beings. Why...your POMPOSITY is ASTOUNDING! Thank you. --------POST-ANNOUNCEMENT ENTERTAINMENT------- Woof woof! Please drive safely.

Friday the 13th by biped 2-13-09

Don't flaunt your butthole, Mitzi. It is unseemly for a young lady to do that. But Mummy, my butthole is soooo beauuu-ti-ful, la la laaaa... HOLY SHIT!!! CHECK OUT THAT DOGGY'S BUTTHOLE!!! ...the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. Ever. Ever, ever...ever... (sigh) Heh, heh--well, I think I'll go back to work now. I didn't really want a break.

A Nurse Bigguns Valentine by biped 2-15-09

GUESS WHAT, MOMMY!!! ME AM IN LOVE!!!! WITH THE GARBAGE MAN YAAAAAAY!!!! That's wonderful, sweetie. Maybe you'll get married, and I'll have grandkids to spoil. An hour later... MOMMY, ME GOT MAD AND SAWED HIM DOWN THE MIDDLE LIKE BOARDS AND BUILDED YOU A MEAT NICKY-NACK SHELF!!! HA HAA!!! Oh...that's (gulp) nice... I'm looking for a missing garbage man. Have you-- HIM GAVE ME AN UGLY VALENTINE CARD--ME BLACKED OUT--THEN HIM A MEAT NICKY-NACK SHELF HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!

JOEY AND TINA!!! AND JOEY'S MOM!!! IN "VALENTINE'S DAY"!!! by biped 2-15-09

I THINK YOU ARE REALLY SWELL TINA!!! WOULD YOU BE MY GIRLFRIEND AND WE CAN GO OUT FOR SODAS AND STUFF!!! NO, JOEY!!! IT IS VALENTINE'S DAY AND YOU DIDN'T MENTION IT OR GET ME A CARD OR ANYTHING!!! HOLY CATS, MOM!!! TINA IS AWESOME BUT SHE HATES ME!!! WHAT THE HECK DID I DO WRONG!!! GIRLS LIKE IT WHEN YOU BUY THEM THINGS LIKE PRETTY FLOWERS, JOEY!!! IT MAKES THEM FEEL SPECIAL!!! I CAN'T AFFORD ANY FLOWERS BUT LOOK!!! HERE'S A STORE WHERE YOU CAN LOOK AT A TON OF THEM FOR FREE!!! NEAT, HUH!!! NO, JOEY!!! YOU ARE SO DUMB!!! GIRLS DON'T JUST WANT TO LOOK AT FLOWERS, YOU HAVE TO BUY THEM FOR US!!!

Danny Girls by biped 2-03-09

Hi! I'm Danny Girls! And I can turn INTO girls! Bull. Let's see it. TA-DAAAAAA!!! See? Holy SHIT! Let's have SEX! Sorry...I only turn into lesbians.

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

A Tribute To Crabby 2004 by biped 1-31-09

Well, here we are in 2004. I'll be right back to show you to your table. Okay. I was in your diner today, and the waiter never came back. Yes, he thought it would be funny to just disappear.

The Vortex of Horror Horse by biped 1-28-09

YAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAAA-AAAAAAAAAAA!!! HA HA HA!!! Mommy, where's Daddy? Oh, he's in his vortex of horror, terrorizing another hapless victim. ...and when I grow up, I want to terrorize people in my very own vortex of horror just like my daddy, Horror Horse. The end.

"Centrifuge" Jones by biped 1-23-09

GASP! It's "Centrifuge" Jones, the all-time greatest Mack Daddy of ALL-TIME! Yo, wut up, Fuck Face. (sigh) He's so cool... Hello, DeWilbur. How was your day? FUCK you, Mom!!!

Charlie Company Gotta Boo-Boo by biped 1-14-09

I've got it, J.B. The next big thing. What is it, Farnsworth? War movies...for babies. It's a huge untapped market. Holy shit, get those fuckers into production ASAP. WAAAAAAA!!! ME GOTTA BIG BOO-BOO!!! IT HURTY!!! ME GOTTA BIG BIG BOO-BOO!!! WAAA-HA-HAAAAAA!!!

The Tender Meatballs by biped 1-08-09

Edna--I wish you'd quit telling Burt Munson how tender his meatballs are. Huh? But, they are. What's wrong with my telling him so? Because...because... IT GIVES HIM AN ERECTION!!! OH MY GOD!!! Hello, Edna? Burt Munson. Would you mind telling me again...how tender my meatballs are? Wait...wait...okay, go. Oh, ICK!!!

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Legend, oh legend, the third wheel legend...always in the way.

The Crab Goes South by biped 12-22-08

YEEE-HAAA!!! Let's commence ta ropin' and a-ridin' and a-rasslin' them dogies, pardners! Err--sorry, Calamity Crab. This is a porn film, not a western. HEEELLLLPPP!!! GET ME OUTTA HERE!!!