Father's Day is upon us. It is a time to celebrate the man who helped raise us and instill within us those good old-fashioned virtues. The man who imparted his wisdom on life, love, and responsibility to us again and again. The giving and caring male figure who.....wait a minute...

My father was a huge jackass who beat me and left me and my mother without paying us any child support. So FUCK HIM! FUCK HIM RIGHT IN THE EAR!!!

And that's what I want you to do, strippers! I want you to show me your best candidates for the Worst Father of the Year Award! Judging shall take place Monday night at 11pm SCT. Anything goes, so get to it...AND THEN GET YOUR ASS OUTSIDE AND MOW THE LAWN!!!

Sorry...I missed therapy...again...

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If it wasn't for bad luck I wouldn't have no luck at all. D'OH!

CC 125: Biological father's day by NeoVid 6-14-02

This is supposed to be a contest about bad fathers, but I don't know what it's like to have one. And I'm way better off than anyone who never had their real father. Morning, son. Hey, Dad.

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"Only things I approve of should exist." -some guy on the internet

Kestorkian by ObiJo 6-14-02

The stork visits the Kevorkian household... Googly woogly. Goo gah haha! Issy bissy baby waby. Gah gaACHOO! I'll grab a pillow. Goo?

I disqualify myself from this contest. Too busy with gabe's mom.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

Dad? by ObiJo 6-14-02

My boy told me there was a contest to see who had the worst father. I feigned interest. Then set him on fire. Feigning interest will cost me with the judges.

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC 125: Worst. Father. Ever. by dcomposed 6-14-02

I love my daughter.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

I never thought I'd say this, but...

Goddamn, that was funny dcomposed!

thank you, Drexle.
I did a print screen of that and it is now my screensaver.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

Borrowed AND recycled! Beat THAT!

Wonderous Stories, by Jack Handey by Namgubed 3-16-02

Daddy, what makes it rain? That's just God crying. But why is God crying? Probably because of something you did.

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"There's no point in beating a dead horse ... except, of course, for the pure joy of it." - A. Whitney Brown

Excellent strip Namgubed.

Perhaps this is accepted elsewhere but as far as I know it's really really gay.

Worst Father possible! by Bazilla 6-14-02

Daaaad! Where are you!? RAAAAAR! HI SON!

I was going to do another one, but it seems dcomposed beat me to it,so now it's rather pointless.

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

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Batman created by Bob Kane

CC 125: blame it on the kids by dcomposed 6-14-02

have a beer, Sally. come on, take you're pants off, you'll enjoy it. you the reason your mother left us.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

OK, who's learnt dcomposed's password?

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I am not 16 going on not 17, I know that I'm naive.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

I admit it, I'm really deisel.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

I feel faint... dcomposed is on a roll tonight, folks!

there getting worse.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

Whew! Okay, we're back to a normal level of suckitude. All systems are operating at normal capacity once again.

Police Doubt Fire Was Arson by TheElPaso 6-14-02

Just cause I dress funny doesn't mean I'm a bad father, does it?

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My love for you is like diarrhea, I just can't hold it in. -Weird Al Yankovic

I knew it was shit befor I posted it.

I alredy used up a whole year worth of funny today.
and evn then my comics still sucked.

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Batman created by Bob Kane

CC125: post surgery dad (a true story) by lara7 6-15-02

Visiting dad on Sunday, March 6: Honey, did I ever tell you my favorite joke? See, this guy gets a job doing man on the street interviews... Oh no, not again... Visiting dad on Sunday, March 13: ...then the guy says, "Ar, go fuck yourself!" Haha! Isn't that a great joke? Yes, dad, that's pretty funny. Visiting dad on Sunday, March 20: Would you like to hear a joke? See, this guy gets a job doing man on the street interviews... Sisyphus has nothing on me.

Not only is this a true story, this pretty much happened every week for 7-10 years. Dad didn't really know any better; he wasn't being a jerk- he sincerely thought he'd never told me this joke.

This is what you all can look forward to when your parents start to lose it. Not that I'm bitter, of course...

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When they invent BookFace, I'm -there-.

CC125: a family legacy by rickward 6-15-02

Dad... Yeah, what is it? I just want you to know that I really appreciate you letting me live here after college and stuff... you're the best Dad ever. Aww, shucks, son. Come on outside with me-- I want to tell you a story about MY daddy. And don't come back until I can't take care of myself! He only does this because he loves me.

I am n00b, hear me roar. *rrrrowwrr*

Wickity Whacked by ObiJo 6-15-02

Hey, dad. Where's mom?

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I ate a hooker half a bottle of knife.

CC 125: It Builds Character by BigEvilDan 6-15-02

Seriously Dad, can't you just snap your fingers and forgive their sins? Maybe if you weren't such a whiner, son.

CC 125: Home Alone VII by BigEvilDan 6-15-02

What is it, honey? I knew we forgot something! We left Kevin at home again! Of course we did, honey. We decided it's less expensive than buying that security system, remember? Oh, right. Let's go hit the bar, then.

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"Oh, look, a joke! How original! Thank you, but if I wanted my emotions stimulated pleasurably, I'd get a whore." - Donald B. Jones III