Hey, Kaufman, I went and bought a bottle.

I got lucky with my selection. Picked it up at the New Hampshire State Liquor Store while traveling this weekend. Not a badly-rated wine for $25 bucks. We'll see if it's any good in a year or two.

The bottle is a keeper, though. It's molded with big creases that form the shape of a Pope's hat and a more detailed pope's hat within it. Plus, just in case you don't know what you bought big letters over that are molded to say CHATEAUNEUF DU PAPE.

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...Trot and Cap'n Bill were free from anxiety and care. Button-Bright never worried about anything. The Scarecrow, not being able to sleep, looked out of the window and tried to count the stars.

Oooooooohhh... firm and muscular, with rustic tannins!

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Who is? The Pope?

Whiskey is so much simpler. I bought this bottle of Black Velvet last week for $8. It has a black plastic cap on it and you twist it off and start chugging. It has a delicate bouquet of... actually, it just tastes like ass and gets you really soused. It does have what the experts call "frangibility" -- if you find yourself on the losing end of a bar fight, you can smack the base abruptly against a wall and wave the jagged edge at your opponent while you make a break for the alleyway.

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"You'll burn for this. Burn in jail!"

I'll never understand you whiskey connoiseurs.

Good whiskey is basicaly like beer on steroids.

I have been a Jack Daniel's drinker for over 25 years. It has a tart, sweet, mellow taste and the Jack Daniel's charcoal filtering process removes all of the heads and tails after distillation. Smooth as a baby's arse, that booze is.

And it get's you fuckoff hammered, yeah.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

More of a vodka man, myself.

If it's spirits we're talking, I bow to Pierre Smirnoff, otherwise a nice big sweaty pint of Tenent's will do me.

Velvet, preferably.

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Dad was flammable

That is absolutely false. I never liked alcohol until I tried my first scotch. I love the stuff; I still can't stand beer.

I never cared so much for JD, but your good scotch whiskey has very smooth flavor with hints of smoke, peat, fruitness, nutiness, and/or salt air, depending on which you get.

Beer just tastes like barley left rotting in big vats of stagnant water for a week. Which is essentially what it is.

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"Old" is the old new.

No, it isn't even vaguely false. Beer and whiskey are made somewhat alike, I have read. I don't like beer, either. As far as Scotch, I'd rather drink paint thinner.

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I wanted my half in the middle and I wound up on the edge.

Ditto. Ever had a Rusty Nail? It's mixed with scotch and drambui, tastes like turpentine... blech.

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“It is only with the heart that one sees rightly; what is essential is invisible to the eye.” - The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry (1945)

Is that the one with its own exit from the thruway? Gotta love that. Don't drink and drive, but hey, here's some liquor right off the damn thruway! ;)

Of course, I stocked up for the camping trip, but hey...

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I has a flavor!

i like ale

plain and simple

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Who knows what fear lurks in the hearts of men? MIKE BOBSICO KNOWS! And if you give him a decent tip when he delivers your mail , he might tell you.

I was drinking about a pint of whiskey a day, and boy does that fuck up your stomach! I'd recommend a Chateau Maalox '03.

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What others say about boorite!

Now, hold it a second, I used to be a bartender and I can tell you that, um, that as far as, um, as far, er...OK, I can't remember. I drank far more than I poured. I think.

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"And Wirthling isn't worth the paper he isn't printed on."

I firmly recommend single malt scotch, well worth the price.

On the other hand, I'm so cheap that I don't serve it to my friends. I just fill up an empty bottle with a good blended scotch, and serve that to them.

Learn that trick from a friend who worked in a really nice restaurant. He kept several empty bottles of Dom Perignon. When he wanted to impress (lay) a girl he brought home, he served her some "Dom". While she was settling in, he loudly popped the cork on an inexpensive champagne. Then quickly decant it into a chilled empty bottle. It worked like a charm, and impressed the panties off many a girl.

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

quote:

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When he wanted to impress (lay) a girl he brought home, he served her some "Dom". While she was settling in, he loudly popped the cork on an inexpensive champagne. Then quickly decant it into a chilled empty bottle. It worked like a charm, and impressed the panties off many a girl.

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There are actually two types of whisky. The Scottish type (spelled whisky) and the Irish type (spelled whiskey). American bourbons are based on the Irish type which is why you Yanks spell it whiskey. Also Scotch can only be called scotch if it is matured for at least 8 years. I used to live near the oldest working distillery is Scotland so I accidentally picked up all this information. This is unfortunate since whisky makes me barf.

Chateauneuf du Pape in a pretty good red wine. The 1988 is a particularly good vintage. We cracked open a bottle of that for my brothers 18th and it was pretty nice. Of course, it is overpriced anywhere except France.

My personal preference for drinking is beer or a good export strength vodka chilled in the freezer till it goes all syrupy. That's good drinkin'. Absolut blue rules.

That Dom Perignon thing is the cheesiest thing I've ever heard. That guy must have thought he was the bomb and he must've screened the women carefully so that he only found women dumb enough to fall for that shit.

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My nuts look disturbingly like cooking apples. Should I see a doctor about it?

Yes, they did tend to be blondes with bra sizes larger than their IQs.

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

Well, duh. Blondes with IQs of 36C or higher are quite rare.

(I assume we're talking hexadecimal?)

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Well, duh. Blondes with IQs of 36C or higher are quite rare.

(I assume we're talking hexadecimal?)

But there's always the chance that that *one* goddess like uberblonde exists in n-dimensional space somewhere and is secretly plotting our downfall as we speak...

"Fear me mankind! With my 876 IQ and ample breasts the days of your chauvanistic humour are numbered!"

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Please replace the handset, and try again.

Pardon my plagiarism of your tagline, Spankling, but a woman with an IQ of 876?

[grovel]

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

Of course you are assuming that they were real blondes. I never got the chance to see if their handbag matched their shoes.

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"Nothing expresses the brutal grandeur of rectal polyps and anal fistulae quite like the mother-tongue of Goethe."

Three out of four brunettes are dyeing to be blonde.

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ken.kaufman@gmail.com

As for my take on the Dom- story, if it isn't Cristall(sp) my panties don't budge!

Ha.

And I am a blonde with an IQ larger than my bra size. Which happens to be bigger than the generic 36C, thankyouverymuch.

ass.

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dcomposed:11-06-05: If I was a viking invading your village, you'd be the first to get raped.
Crabby: 10/5/06: i would love to feed you fresh fruit while bathing you.

quote:

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And I am a blonde with an IQ larger than my bra size. Which happens to be bigger than the generic 36C, thankyouverymuch.

ass.

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